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Dave Stachowiak

Leaders aren’t born, they’re made. This Monday show helps you discover leadership wisdom through insightful conversations. Independently produced weekly since 2011, Dr. Dave Stachowiak brings perspective from a thriving, global leadership academy, plus more than 15 years of leadership at Dale Carnegie. Bestselling authors, expert researchers, deep conversation, and regular dialogue with listeners have attracted 40 million downloads and over 250K followers on Spotify and Apple Podcasts. Activate your FREE membership to access the entire leadership and management library at CoachingforLeaders.com

Coaching for Leaders

Dave speaks with Erann Lincoln, an alum of the Coaching for Leaders Academy, on how she started small to build stronger relationships with her team.

Applications to the Coaching for Leaders Academy will open the first week of September. Visit the Academy page to request an early invitation.

The Power of Starting Small, with Erann Lincoln

Jenny Wood: Wild Courage
Over an 18-year career at Google, Jenny Wood grew from entry-level to executive, most recently leading a large operations team that helped drive billions of revenue per year. In 2021, she started a passion project within Google called Own Your Career, which grew to one of the largest career development programs in Google’s history. Her work has since been featured in Harvard Business Review, Entrepreneur, and Forbes, and she’s now the author of Wild Courage: Go After What You Want and Get It*.

Leadership is about serving others – and it’s also ensuring that we take care of ourselves along the way. Sometimes leaders over-index on helping their organizations and teams, to their own detriment. In this conversation, Jenny and I explore where being a little more selfish might actually be better for everyone.
Key Points

 Selfish redefined means having the courage to stand up for what you want.
 People want to join a winning team, even if they don’t say that out loud.
 Guilt is natural, but always caving to it is self-defeating.
 Don’t do work that’s not actually promotable. There’s no prize for an empty inbox.
 A belief like “I owe it to them,” may signal an over-commitment to the organization. They will not love you back.
 Appreciate truth when you get it, but don’t sign up for a burned-out boss.
 It’s inefficient to always be in the lead. Draft in another leader’s wake.

Resources Mentioned

 Wild Courage: Go After What You Want and Get It* by Jenny Wood

Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

 Align Your Calendar to What Matters, with Nir Eyal (episode 431)
 The Ways Leadership Can Derail Us, with Bill George (episode 596)
 The Path to More Joy in Work and Life, with Judith Joseph (episode 734)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

744: Where Being Selfish is Better, with Jenny Wood

Roger Kneebone: Expert
Roger Kneebone directs the Imperial College Centre for Engagement and Simulation Science and the Royal College of Music–Imperial College Centre for Performance Science. He researches what experts from different fields can learn from one another, including a creative team of clinicians, computer scientists, musicians, magicians, potters, puppeteers, tailors, and fighter pilots. He is the author of Expert: Understanding the Path to Mastery*.

Many leaders get into the roles they have because they are the experts in their work. But once you’re leading, the work is less about being the expert and more about teaching your expertise to others. In this conversation, Roger and I explore how to get better at doing this well.
Key Points

 Experts don’t often recognize that they are experts.
 A characteristic of many experts is a dissatisfaction with where they are and an awareness that they could do better.
 Experts should notice what’s missing and what would be most helpful to the less experienced person.
 Effective teachers zero in on one thing at a time, even if they notice many areas for improvement.
 Passing along expertise is not just the skills themselves but the perspective of why each skill matters.
 Land in the zone of proximal development. The skill should neither be too easy nor too difficult.

Resources Mentioned

 Expert: Understanding the Path to Mastery* by Roger Kneebone

Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

 Help People Learn Through Powerful Teaching, with Pooja Agarwal (episode 421)
 The Art of Mentoring Well, with Robert Lefkowitz (episode 599)
 How to Handle High-Pressure Situations, with Dan Dworkis (episode 701)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

743: How to Teach Your Expertise to Others, with Roger Kneebone

Sabina Nawaz: You’re the Boss
Sabina Nawaz is an executive coach who advises C-level executives and teams at Fortune 500 corporations, government agencies, nonprofits, and academic institutions. During her 14-year tenure at Microsoft, she went from managing software development teams to leading the company’s executive development and succession planning efforts for over 11,000 managers and nearly a thousand executives, advising Bill Gates and Steve Ballmer directly. She’s the author of You're the Boss: Become the Manager You Want to Be (and Others Need)*.

Every leader I know intends to be authentic. Unfortunately, we sometimes use authenticity as an excuse not to do the critical work of calibrating our actions. In this conversation, Sabina and I discuss how to avoid that trap so we can show up more genuinely for others.
Key Points

 “Yeah, but…” signals justification and holds us back from what we most need to learn.
 Your success comes despite unhelpful traits, not because of them.
 Pure authenticity is a complete fallacy. Authenticity is not singular.
 We sometimes use authenticity as an excuse not to do the important work of calibrating our actions.
 Don’t let the smokescreen of past “authenticity” get in the way of growth.
 Authenticity is not static. Reading your old past social media posts will remind you of this.
 When shifting, start with small experiments to nudge you in a new direction.

Language that may be warning signs of the authenticity trap:

 “That’s just how I am.”
 “I’m not the kind of person who…”
 “I’m not being true to myself if…”
 “That’s the way I’ve always done things, and it’s worked for me.”

Resources Mentioned

 You're the Boss: Become the Manager You Want to Be (and Others Need)* by Sabina Nawaz

Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

 How to Change Your Behavior, with BJ Fogg (episode 507)
 How to Start a Big Leadership Role, with Carol Kauffman (episode 617)
 The Habits That Hold Leaders Back, with Marshall Goldsmith (episode 696)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

742: The Problem Leaders Have With Authenticity, with Sabina Nawaz

Minda Harts: Talk to Me Nice
Minda Harts is a bestselling author, workplace consultant, and sought-after keynote speaker who is redefining what it means to build trust in the workplace. As the bestselling author of The Memo, Right Within, and You Are More Than Magic, Minda has empowered thousands to be their own best advocates and navigate workplace challenges with confidence. She has just released her newest book, Talk to Me Nice: The Seven Trust Languages for a Better Workplace.

Sometimes we assume that we’re helping by shielding people from difficult news. But as we all know, virtually everyone wants transparency from leaders. In this conversation, Minda shows us how to get better at it.
Key Points

 You’re not helping by shielding people from difficult conversations.
 Most everyone assumes baseline behaviors of employees. Employees expect reciprocity through transparency.
 We often think about transparency with information that’s known. Just as important is clarity about what’s not known.
 Even when you can’t share news, you can put time and resources into what will help people handle a new reality when it arrives.
 Transparency provides clear, honest, and timely information.
 Promote transparency in roles. A job description is a helpful starting point for this.
 Good intentions do not mean good impact. When changes happen, communicate them as quickly as practical.

Resources Mentioned

 Talk to Me Nice: The Seven Trust Languages for a Better Workplace* by Minda Harts

Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

 The Path Towards Trusting Relationships, with Edgar Schein and Peter Schein (episode 539)
 How to Help Difficult Conversations Go Better, with Sheila Heen (episode 655)
 Preparing for a Conversation with Someone You Don’t Trust, with Charles Feltman (episode 708)

Expert Partner
Are you a talent development or human resources leader seeking a coach for an internal client? Coaching for Leaders has partnered with some of the top coaches in the world, including a number of past podcast guests. Help us make an introduction by visiting our Expert Partners Page and telling us what you’re seeking in a coach.
Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

741: Getting Better at Transparency, with Minda Harts

Michael Bungay Stanier: Change Signal
Michael Bungay Stanier is best known for The Coaching Habit, the best-selling coaching book of the century and recognized as a classic. He was a Rhodes Scholar, and was recently awarded the coaching prize by Thinkers50. He's now the host of the new Change Signal podcast.

If you’re doing change right, it’s going to be messy. In this conversation, Michael Bungay Stanier returns to show us where to start, the key mindsets to have, and the first steps for getting traction.
Key Points

 If you’re doing change right, it’s going to be messy.
 Before you remove a fence, figure out why it’s there.
 Take inspiration from Emily Dickinson: “Tell all the truth but tell it slant.”
 Beware giving lip service to the emotional realities of change and then moving forward without really addressing them.
 Strategy is a living conversation. Run experiments. Fire bullets before cannonballs.
 Motivation is a critical factor in change. Better to be less efficient and have people with you than to force compliance with a “perfect” plan.

Emily Dickinson:
Tell all the truth but tell it slant —
Success in Circuit lies
Too bright for our infirm Delight
The Truth's superb surprise
As Lightning to the Children eased
With explanation kind
The Truth must dazzle gradually
Or every man be blind —
Resources Mentioned

 Change Signal podcast hosted by Michael Bungay Stanier
 The Coaching Habit* by Michael Bungay Stanier

Related Episodes

 Engaging People Through Change, with Cassandra Worthy (episode 571)
 How to Approach a Reorg, with Claire Hughes Johnson (episode 621)
 How to Prevent a Team From Repeating Mistakes, with Robert “Cujo” Teschner (episode 660)

Expert Partner
Are you a talent development or human resources leader seeking a coach for an internal client? Coaching for Leaders has partnered with some of the top coaches in the world, including a number of past podcast guests. Help us make an introduction by visiting our Expert Partners Page and telling us what you’re seeking in a coach.
Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

740: How to Lead Organizational Change, with Michael Bungay Stanier

Kevin Evers: There’s Nothing Like This
Kevin Evers is a Senior Editor at Harvard Business Review. Passionate about shaping groundbreaking research and amplifying pioneering ideas, he has edited bestselling and award-winning books on high performance, creativity, innovation, digital disruption, marketing, and strategy. He is the author of There’s Nothing Like This: The Strategic Genius of Taylor Swift*.

You may love her music. You may not. You may think she’s a business genius…or perhaps no. But one thing is for sure, you cannot ignore Taylor Swift. In this conversation, Kevin and I explore Swift’s strategic approach and what every leader can learn from her success.
Key Points

 Swift knows exactly her “job to be done” and delivers on it consistently.
 Swift treats her fans’ emotions and experiences with respect, and they respond in kind.
 Andy Grove famously said that only the paranoid survive. It’s one of many traits that helps Swift stay successful.
 Swift’s transition to pop was promotion-focused rather than prevention-focused. She led the story of her transformation.
 Not only is Swift clear on her vision, but she regularly reflects on the difficult steps to get there.
 Swift is a remarkable example of antifragility. Not only does she withstand stress and shocks, but they make her stronger.

Resources Mentioned

 There’s Nothing Like This: The Strategic Genius of Taylor Swift* by Kevin Evers

Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

 Doing Better Than Zero Sum-Thinking, with Renée Mauborgne (episode 641)
 The Reason People Make Buying Decisions, with Marcus Collins (episode 664)
 How to Keep Improving, with Maurice Ashley (episode 697)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

739: What Leaders Should Learn from Taylor Swift, with Kevin Evers

Faisal Hoque: Transcend
Faisal Hoque is an award-winning entrepreneur and innovator and founder of SHADOKA and NextChapter. He is a three-time Wall Street Journal bestselling author of the books: Reinvent, Everything Connects, and Lift. He has just released his newest book: Transcend: Unlocking Humanity in the Age of AI*.

The most compelling use cases for AI aren’t people OR AI – it’s both. Leaders who learn how to partner with AI will almost certainly open doors that many others don’t. In this episode, Faisal and I explore (a few steps on) how to get started.
Key Points

 While we think about working with AI as very different than working with people, similar mindsets and skill sets help us with both.
 Partnering well with AI means asking better questions and being genuinely interested in the answers.
 Experts are limited by their perspective. Beginners are open to possibilities. We should approach AI with a beginner’s mindset.
 Using AI well means getting more comfortable with uncertainty. We need to own our ignorance.
 Playful discovery helps with our intrinsic motivation to keep going. When using AI, find the fun that keeps you engaged.
 This technology will do the logical work far better than any human. To partner well, work to increase your emotional intelligence.

Resources Mentioned

 Transcend: Unlocking Humanity in the Age of AI by Faisal Hoque

Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

 The Way to Be More Self-Aware, with Tasha Eurich (episode 442)
 Principles for Using AI at Work, with Ethan Mollick (episode 674)
 Becoming an AI-Savvy Leader, with David De Cremer (episode 710)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

738: How to Partner Well with AI, with Faisal Hoque

Alice Ferris: GoalBusters
Alice Ferris is the Founding Partner of GoalBusters, a firm working to help small and mighty fundraising teams achieve big impact by planning practical strategies, teaching essential fundraising skills, and doing the hands-on work to turn vision into reality. She has more than 30 years of professional fundraising experience, specializing in strategic and development planning, campaign readiness and development program assessments, board and organizational training, executive leadership coaching, individual giving, and grant proposal evaluation. She’s also a graduate of the Coaching for Leaders Academy.

Fundraising is not a word that sparks joy for most leaders. In fact, many people who do fundraising never planned to have that be part of their career. And yet, almost every leader has an aspect of fundraising in their professional or personal lives. In this conversation, Alice and I explore how to get better at it.
Key Points

 Almost every leader is involved with fundraising in some capacity, either personally or professionally.
 It’s a myth that fundraising is just asking for money. Most fundraising activities happen outside of the ask.
 Consider fundraising goals for must-do activities, maintaining the current state, and aspirational growth.
 Most people share health issues with their immediate family and close friends. When your organization is facing headwinds, tell your donors how they can help.
 Dedicated attention to fundraising is key for both prioritization and relationship continuity.
 Connectors, experts, and closers are all essential roles in the fundraising process. Play to the strengths of both staff and volunteers to fill these roles well.

Resources Mentioned

 Connect with Alice on LinkedIn
 GoalBusters

Related Episodes

 How to Lead Top-Line Growth, with Tim Sanders (episode 299)
 How an Executive Aligns with a Board, with Joan Garry (episode 662)
 The Reason People Make Buying Decisions, with Marcus Collins (episode 664)

Expert Partner
Beginning a career transition? Feeling stagnant in your current role? Scott Barlow and his team may be able to help as official partners of Coaching for Leaders. To discover more about how his team can support you, get in touch on our expert partners page.
Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

737: How to Fundraise for Leaders Who Never Wanted to Fundraise, with Alice Ferris

Matt Dixon: The Activator Advantage
Matt Dixon is Founding Partner of DCM Insights, a global training and advisory firm, and a leading expert in business development and client experience. His first book The Challenger Sale was a #1 Amazon and Wall Street Journal bestseller, and translated in a dozen languages. His newest book with colleagues Rory Channer, Karen Freeman, and Ted McKenna is The Activator Advantage: What Today’s Rainmakers Do Differently*.

At lot of us know the traits of the kind of person who’s successful at attracting new business. What many of us don’t know, is that what’s working today is actually different than what we traditionally think. In this conversation, Matt and I a take a detailed look at the professionals who are landing the most new business – and what they’re doing that works.
Key Points

 The loyalty that once existed between professionals and their clients has changed substantially in recent years.
 A type of professional called an activator represents the highest performance in business development.
 Activators assume their best clients will leave at some point and are consistently working to build a pipeline of opportunities.
 Many professionals tend to protect client relationships. In contrast, activators actively bring colleagues into these relationships.
 Activators don’t wait for inquiries. They make opportunities happen by building relationships before paid work begins.
 Activators go way past birthdays and factual knowledge about others. They discover what’s important to their clients as individuals.
 Activators go way past “as is” content and work hard to thoughtfully connect it to a prospect or client’s situation.

Resources Mentioned

 The Activator Advantage: What Today’s Rainmakers Do Differently* by Matt Dixon, Rory Channer, Karen Freeman, and Ted McKenna

Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

 The Surprising Truth About Influencing Others, with Daniel Pink (episode 84)
 How to Become the Person You Want to Be, with James Clear (episode 376)
 The Way to Earn Attention, with Raja Rajamannar (episode 521)

Expert Partner
Finding it hard to make an impression in a noisy marketplace? Many listeners have reached out to David Hutchens to help their organizations get traction through the power of story. If you’re planning an offsite or training to get better, get in touch with us to start the conversation with David or any of our other expert partners.
Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

736: How High Performers Land New Business, with Matt Dixon

Erica Dhawan: Digital Body Language
Erica Dhawan is a globally recognized leadership expert and keynote speaker helping organizations and leaders innovate faster and further, together. Named as one of the top management professionals around the world by Global Gurus, she is the founder and CEO of Cotential, a company that has helped leaders and teams leverage twenty-first-century collaboration skills.

Erica’s writing has appeared in dozens of publications, including Fast Company and Harvard Business Review. She is the co-author of Get Big Things Done* and the author of the new book, Digital Body Language: How to Build Trust and Connection, No Matter the Distance*.

In this conversation, Erica and I highlight common missteps that cause leaders to generate unnecessary anxiety from their communication. We discuss how brevity, response time, passive aggressiveness, and formality can work against us — and what we can adjust on our own behaviors to do better.
Key Points

 In a way, all of us are now immigrants, processing more interactions in a digital world that is less familiar.
 Excessive brevity may save a few keystrokes or seconds in the moment, but can generate lots of extra work for the team and organization.
 Reduce anxiety by being explicit about our expectations on response time and teaching others what to expect from us.
 Changing tone and formality without explanation can be jarring.
 Seemingly unimportant choices like who we list first on emails can generate assumptions from those we’re communicating to.

Resources Mentioned

 Digital Body Language: How to Build Trust and Connection, No Matter the Distance* by Erica Dhawan
 The Digital Body Language Expert Course

Related Episodes

 How to Balance Care and Accountability When Leading Remotely, with Jonathan Raymond (episode 464)
 How to Run an Online Meeting, with Bonni Stachowiak (episode 472)
 How to Be Present, with Dave Crenshaw (episode 511)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

528: Where You May Be Provoking Anxiety, with Erica Dhawan

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