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Liz Iacuzzi

Hosted by Tyler Measom and Liz Iacuzzi, Was I In A Cult? is a documentary-style podcast showcasing individuals who have been in, and most importantly, successfully left a cult. Told first-hand by the experiencer themself, these are raw, riveting and inspirational tales of what it means to be a survivor. Using levity and info-tainment, the show humanizes the cultic experience and may leave some of our listeners asking themselves "Wait, Was I In A Cult?"

If you or someone you know has been in a cult and want to share your story, contact us at info@wasiinacult.com. We'd love to hear from you.

Was I In A Cult?

Hi faithful listeners - 
 
We're going to have to delay release of this episode until we get a behind the scenes technical issue sorted out. Please don't look behind the red curtain.

ATTENTION LISTENERS: SLIGHT EPISODE RELEASE DELAY

CONTENT WARNING: This episode discusses sexual assault. Not in graphic detail, but please listen accordingly.
 
For 19 years, Lizzie Ens lived in one of the most conservative Amish sects in America: the Swartzentruber Amish. Last week you learned about her upbringing and all facets of living a life off the grid with no electricity, no indoor plumbing, and very little autonomy over her own life.
 
In Part 2, the horse-and-buggy postcard version of Amish life disappears fast.
 
Lizzie takes us inside the bizarre dating ritual called "bundling," and into the darker corners of the community — sexual assault, shunning, suppression, and the impossible weight of knowing that leaving means leaving everything behind. Including her twin sister.
 
Eventually, she realizes something terrifying: if she doesn't escape now… she may never escape at all.
 
 
 
What follows is one of the wildest escape stories we've ever covered.
 
__________________________________
 
RESOURCES:
 
 RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) Bailing Out Benji 
__________________________________
 
FIND LIZZIE:
 
Instagram: @lizzieens_wellness / TikTok: @lizzieh_wellness
 
Book: Amish Renegade: The Anthropology of an Amish Girl Turned Global CEO
 
Website: undietyou.com
 
_____________________________________
 
FOLLOW US → For more culty content — follow us on Instagram & TikTok → @wasiinacult
 
SUPPORT THE SHOW
 Join our Patreon! Get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes conversations. (And our forever gratitude)
 
HAVE A CULTY STORY?
 Email us → info@wasiinacult.com

Swartzentruber Amish — PT2: "Promoted to Wearer of Jeans"

Many people picture a peaceful, technology-free life of butter churning, candle making, and horse-drawn buggies. But for today's guest, the reality behind the plain dresses and pastoral image was far more restrictive, and far more dangerous.
 
Lizzie grew up in one of the strictest Amish sects in the country: the Swartzentruber Amish. No electricity. No indoor plumbing. No music. No photographs. No Rumspringa. And absolutely no preparation for life outside the community.
 
In this first part of a two-part conversation, Lizzie shares what it was like growing up under intense control, the rigid rules imposed on women, and how isolation and fear kept members obedient. She also opens up about the early cracks in her belief system—and the impossible choices that eventually led her to attempt an escape.
 
 __________________________________
 
FIND LIZZIE:
 
Instagram: @lizzieens_wellness / TikTok: @lizzieh_wellness
 
Book: Amish Renegade: The Anthropology of an Amish Girl Turned Global CEO
 
Website: undietyou.com
 
_____________________________________
 
FOLLOW US → For more culty content — follow us on Instagram & TikTok → @wasiinacult
 
SUPPORT THE SHOW
 Join our Patreon! Get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes conversations. (And our forever gratitude)
 
 
 
HAVE A CULTY STORY?
 Email us → info@wasiinacult.com

Swartzentruber Amish — PT1: "Promoted to Housework"

Four hours into a hostage situation between a man and a woman, the man walks out the door. In that moment, the woman's primal instinct kicks in: "Grab your kids and RUN." 
 
Later, she learns that action may have saved her life. He wasn't just leaving. He was going to get a gun. And the man? It was her husband.
 
 At 33-years-old, Tia Levings walked away from the Christian Patriarchy system that dictated her body, her voice, and her life for 13 years.
 
If there were ever a guest who embodies the entire ethos of this show, it's Tia Levings. A badass is an understatement.
 
Now a New York Times bestselling author of "A Well-Trained Wife" and featured in "Shiny Happy People," Tia joins us to unpack: 
 
'Trad wives' and how this movement is far from just churned butter on Instagram. The wedding night she finally has language for. The daughter she lost. How, and more importantly why, the Christian Patriarchy movement has surged over the past decade.
 
 And her new book. "I Belong to Me." The survival guide she wishes she had access to when she first got out. It's now our #1 recommendation for anyone leaving a high-control group. A non-judgmental, non-preachy, non-guru self-help book? Who knew?!
 
Tia is brilliant, funny, and unflinchingly honest. And if you leave with one thing, let it be her words: "If you can't speak in your power, you can't f*ck in your power." 
 
NOTE to our Patreon subscribers:
 You can watch the full, unedited two-and-a-half-hour interview with Tia now on our Patreon. Thank you for being on this journey with us.
 FIND TIA: 
Website: tialevings.com
 
Socials @TiaLevingsWriter: Instagram, TikTok, Facebook
 
Substack: tialevings.substack.com — where she does real-time religious deconstruction
 
TIA'S BOOKS:
 
"I Belong to Me: A Survivor's Guide to Recovery and Hope After Religious Trauma"

 "A Well-Trained Wife: My Escape from Christian Patriarchy" (now in paperback)
 
 
 
FOLLOW US → For more culty content — follow us on Instagram & TikTok → @wasiinacult
 
SUPPORT THE SHOW
 Join our Patreon! Get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes conversations. (And our forever gratitude)
 
 
 
HAVE A CULTY STORY?
 Email us → info@wasiinacult.com

Christian Patriarchy: "The OG 'Trad Wife'"

**PLEASE NOTE: This episode originally aired in Oct 2024. Since, there have been quite a few updates to both the cult and story. Tune into the episode to hear more.**
 
____
 
In Part 2 of Angela's story, the realities of Falun Gong's grip on her family deepen. Angela reflects on the emotional toll of a cult that prioritized spiritual salvation over physical health—even as her mother's condition worsens. But escaping isn't easy when your family remains deep in the cult's ideologies… Angela's journey out of this cult is filled with heartbreaking revelations and the resilience that defines a true "surthirver."
 
_____
 
FOLLOW US → For more culty content — follow us on Instagram & TikTok → @wasiinacult
 
SUPPORT THE SHOW
 
Join our Patreon! Get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes conversations. (And our forever gratitude)
 
HAVE A CULTY STORY?
 
Email us → info@wasiinacult.com

Shen Yun/Falun Gong is Still a Cult! Pt2 [UPDATE]

**PLEASE NOTE: This episode originally aired in Oct 2024. Since, there have been quite a few updates to both the cult and story. Tune into the episode to hear more.**
 
____
 
When her mother fell sick, young Angela had no idea that she would spend her childhood growing up in a dangerous cult. Falun Gong, a Chinese spiritual movement-slash-religion-slash-cult, known for its Shen Yun dancers and its ties to 'The Epoch Times' entangled her family in its facade of meditation and enlightenment. In this two-part episode, Angela recounts her experience in a world where karma is not just a bitch, but a force that can dictate life and death… with suffering seen as a path to salvation and modern medicine demonized as an obstacle to spiritual purity. And just when you think it can't get any wilder, the Capitol Insurrection storms into the story… 
 

 
This is Part 1 of Angela's powerful story. 
 
_____
 
FOLLOW US → For more culty content — follow us on Instagram & TikTok → @wasiinacult
 
SUPPORT THE SHOW
 
Join our Patreon! Get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes conversations. (And our forever gratitude)
 
HAVE A CULTY STORY?
 
Email us → info@wasiinacult.com

SHOW ANNOUNCEMENT & Shen Yun/Falun Gong is Still a Cult! Pt1 [UPDATE]

As a young teenager, Darls Centola was searching for something steady in a chaotic world. What she found was the Jehovah's Witnesses—a religion that felt warm, structured, and safe.
 
What she didn't expect to find… was him.
 
Not the King of Pop. Not the global icon. Not Michael Jackson. 
 
Just Michael. 
 
A shy, curious, thoughtful teenage boy looking to her for religious guidance. 
 
What unfolds is almost impossibly pure. Two kids hiding behind their school not to smoke pot, but to talk about faith and opening orphanages one day—all while trying (and failing) to suppress feelings they aren't allowed to feel. 
 
Because inside their dogma, a crush isn't just a crush. It could get you killed at Armageddon. And as their bond deepens... so does the control. 
 
Until the belief system that brought them together… is the very thing that tears them apart.
 
This isn't a story about fame. It's not a takedown. And it's not a defense.
 
It's about first love. 
 
And a deeply human, intimate look at a version of someone the world thinks it already understands, set against the very real, very damaging impact of cult abuse.
 
And the uncomfortable truth that both light and darkness can exist at the same time.
 
______________
 
Today, Darls Centola is a licensed clinical social worker, educator and EMDR consultant with a focus on the impact of spiritual abuse and high control systems. 
 
She has written a memoir about the innocent and heartbreaking time in her life inside a cult with teenage Michael Jackson from the POV of that young girl. A time that didn't just change her life... but may have quietly shaped his too.
 
Purchase Darls' memoir here: "Finding Truth with Michael: A Memoir of Friendship, Faith and First Love"
 
Find Darls' workbook and other resources on her website: findingtruthwithmichael.com 
 
FOLLOW US → For more culty content — follow us on Instagram & TikTok → @wasiinacult
 
SUPPORT THE SHOW
 
Join our Patreon! Get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes conversations. (And our forever gratitude)
 
HAVE A CULTY STORY?
 
Email us → info@wasiinacult.com

Jehovah's Witnesses: "Michael Jackson Was Just 'Michael' to Me"

If Part 1 was the seduction… this is the unraveling.
 
By now, Celeste is fully in - the "true believer" phase we like to call it. The relationships feel real. The stakes feel real. And the consequences for questioning it? Also very real.
 
Because inside this world, there are rules. Rewards for loyalty. Punishments for doubt. And what once felt magical begins to shift. The cracks start to show. And Celeste is forced to confront a terrifying possibility:
 
What if none of this is real?
 
What follows is a slow, psychological tug-of-war between belief and reality - until one discovery changes everything.
 
After all, the most shocking part wasn't that there were vampires on the internet.
 
It was who was pretending to be them. 
 
______
 

 
FOLLOW CELESTE → Instagram @celestemott | Tiktok @celestemoth
 
FOLLOW US → For more culty content — follow us on Instagram & TikTok → @wasiinacult
 
SUPPORT THE SHOW
 
Join our Patreon! Get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes conversations. (And our forever gratitude)
 
HAVE A CULTY STORY?
 
Email us → info@wasiinacult.com

Online Vampire Cult - Pt2: "404: Vampire Not Found"

At 16, Celeste Mott was alone, grieving, and searching - for meaning, for connection, for something that felt bigger than her small, suburban life.
 
And then she found them.
 
An online world inspired by Anne Rice.
 
Dark. Seductive. Intelligent.
 
A place where vampires weren't just characters… they were real.
 
Or at least—that's what they lead her to believe.
 
This was the early 2000s internet— before social media, before real names, before anyone was asking who's actually behind the screen.
 
Message boards. Chat rooms. Total anonymity. The perfect environment for something to take hold… unnoticed.
 
What begins as a message board for Anne Rice fans, transforms into something far darker. Something that on the surface, sounds completely unbelievable. Except not when you know how cults operate. 
 
Because this wasn't just fandom.
 
This was belonging.
 
This was identity.
 
This was… a promise.
 
And like every good cult—it knew exactly what she needed to hear.
 
This is Part 1 of 2. 
 
______
 
FOLLOW CELESTE → Instagram @celestemott | Tiktok @celestemoth
 
FOLLOW US → For more culty content — follow us on Instagram & TikTok → @wasiinacult
 
SUPPORT THE SHOW
 
Join our Patreon! Get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes conversations. (And our forever gratitude)
 
HAVE A CULTY STORY?
 
Email us → info@wasiinacult.com

Online Vampire Cult - Pt1: "Armand Has Entered The Chat"

Michelle Dowd was born into a cult that was literally training boys to fight in God's army when the apocalypse came.
 
It started in sunny Pasadena, California when her grandfather - a former Boy Scout leader - decided the Scouts weren't strict enough and built his own organization. Boys were recruited young, drilled like soldiers, and raised to believe they were preparing for the end of the world.
 
Michelle grew up inside the group known as "The Field," running miles before breakfast, enduring military-style obedience drills, selling candy to fund the movement, and eventually living for years on a remote mountain with basically no formal education.
 
What eventually happened is almost unbelievable: a secret college application, a full scholarship, and a cult survivor with no formal education… to becoming a professor teaching critical thinking.
 
Michelle Dowd is now a writer and the author of Forager: Field Notes for Surviving a Family Cult.
 
_____________________________________
 
MICHELLE DOWD LINKS → Instagram @michelledowdz | 
 
Subscribe to Michelle's FREE WEEKLY NEWSLETTER
 
Listen to Michelle's book "Forager" on SPOTIFY FOR FREE
 
Pick up a copy of Forager: Field Notes for Surviving a Family Cult"
 
Michelle's NYT Modern Love essay: "Love in a Time of Low Expectations"
 
***
 
Tyler's mascot book mention: Where Are the Fighting Giraffes? by David Winder
 
FOLLOW US 
 
For more culty content - follow us on Instagram & TikTok → @wasiinacult
 
SUPPORT THE SHOW
 
Join our Patreon! Get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes conversations. (And our forever gratitude)
 
HAVE A CULTY STORY?
 
Email us → info@wasiinacult.com

Boys Christian League: "Training Boys for God's Army"

SHOWNOTES: 
 
"A ballet cult?" We asked the same thing. But today's brave guest, Summer Smith, shares what happens when the world of pliés and pirouettes meets dogmatic devotion. Raised in a strict religious family and molded by the intense world of competitive ballet, Summer's journey takes a surprising twist when she joins Ballet 58, a seemingly innocuous Christian ballet company in Chicago. Soon devotions blend with dance routines, and artistic discipline intertwines with cult-like control. As Summer navigates the thin line between dedication and manipulation, you'll be left questioning just how far the influence of a charismatic leader can reach. 
 
LINKS:
 
 • Follow Us: Instagram/Tik Tok: @wasiinacult
 • Support Us: https://www.patreon.com/wasiinacult
 • Have a story to share on our show? Email Us: info@wasiinacult.com
 • Find Summer and all the ex Ballet 58'ers sub Reddit: 
 
https://www.reddit.com/r/ex58/
 
 • Watch In The Balance:
 
https://vimeo.com/535912792/7551d1ed90

Ballet 58: "Pray, then plié!"

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