The School of Greatness

The Secret Skill of People Who Never Feel Lonely | Charles DuhiggThe person you turn to on your worst day isn't the funniest or the smartest. They're the one who makes you feel understood. That skill has a name: super communicator. And according to research, it's not a personality trait. It's a set of learnable habits. The same way anyone can learn to read. Charles Duhigg is a Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist and author of Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection. He spent years studying what separates the people we love talking to from everyone else, and what he found will change how you walk into every conversation. Every discussion is actually three conversations layered on top of each other: a practical one, an emotional one, and a social one. When you're having a different one than the person across from you, connection breaks down before it even starts. Super communicators know how to identify which conversation is happening and match it. They also ask 10 to 20 times more questions than the average person. Not to interrogate, but to signal: I'm here. I'm listening. You matter. Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection Amazon Ebook Audiobook Smarter Faster Better: The Transformative Power of Real Productivity Amazon Ebook Audiobook The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business Amazon Ebook Audiobook In this episode you will: • Understand why the Harvard Adult Happiness Study found that the number of deep relationships you have at age 45 predicts whether you live up to 20 years longer • Learn the looping for understanding technique, a 3-step method from Harvard's negotiation program that proves you've actually heard someone • Identify the three types of conversations (practical, emotional, and social) and how matching the wrong one destroys connection before it starts • Use bids for connection to unlock career opportunities, build deeper friendships, and get responses from people you most want to reach • Apply motivational interviewing, the same technique the CDC used to shift entrenched beliefs, to navigate conflict without arguing For more information go to https://lewishowes.com/1943 For more Greatness text PODCAST to +1 (614) 350-3960 Follow The Daily Motivation for essential highlights from The School of Greatness More SOG episodes we think you’ll love: Vanessa Van Edwards Evy Poumpouras Dr. Caroline Fleck TOPICS Charles Duhigg, Supercommunicators, looping for understanding, neural entrainment, emotional reciprocity, motivational interviewing, Harvard Adult Happiness Study, loneliness epidemic, bids for connection, deep questions Get More From Lewis! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

1949|1T 24M

Stop Living for What Others Think of You | Meg JosephsonYou're not just a people pleaser. You're running a survival response your nervous system learned to keep you safe. Most of us were taught that being agreeable, flexible, and endlessly giving was a virtue. Meg Josephson, a licensed psychotherapist and author of the New York Times bestselling book Are You Mad At Me?, says that pattern is actually a trauma response, and it's running your relationships, your sense of self, and your inner world without you even realizing it. The fawn response is the fourth threat response, alongside fight, flight, and freeze. It's the one we never get punished for. We get applauded. And that applause is exactly what makes it so hard to break. Meg breaks down the six archetypes it can take: the peacekeeper, the performer, the perfectionist, the chameleon, the caretaker, and the lone wolf. What it costs you isn't just your time or your boundaries. It's your identity. When you spend years morphing yourself to be liked in every room, you stop knowing what you actually want, feel, or believe. Meg went to a store after college and realized she didn't know her own favorite color. That's the depth of self-erasure people pleasing creates. The path out starts with one counterintuitive skill: learning to tolerate discomfort. Not fixing, not performing, not self-optimizing. Just pausing long enough to notice what's happening beneath the fawn response, and choosing something different. Are You Mad At Me? Amazon Ebook Audiobook Meg's Instagram Meg's TikTok Meg's Substack Meg's Website In this episode you will: • Understand how complex trauma and generational patterns keep the approval-seeking cycle alive across lifetimes • Build the tolerance for discomfort that breaks the people pleasing pattern and lets you show up as your full self • Discover the fawn response and why it is the one threat response society actively rewards instead of corrects • Identify which of the six people pleaser archetypes is quietly running your behavior in relationships and at work • Learn the critical difference between reassurance seeking and genuine validation, and why only one of them actually heals the root For more information go to https://lewishowes.com/1942 For more Greatness text PODCAST to +1 (614) 350-3960 Follow The Daily Motivation for essential highlights from The School of Greatness More SOG episodes we think you’ll love: Lewis Howes Solo [Stop Helping Everyone But Yourself] Emily McDonald Dr. K TOPICS Meg Josephson, people pleasing, fawn response, internal family systems, complex trauma, reassurance vs. validation, people pleaser archetypes, shame and self-blame, nervous system healing, generational trauma, Are You Mad At Me Get More From Lewis! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

1948|1T 6M

Episodes

Lyt når som helst, hvor som helst

Andre har også lyttet til ...