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The Angry Therapist

Audio-Only Episodes. Captain’s Log: No guests. No fluff. Just me, the mic, and whatever’s clawing at my insides. Think audio journaling meets back-of-the-bar confessions. Less psychobabble, more soul bleed. Raw, real, and mostly for me.

Audio + Video Episodes. You ask, I riff. Therapy meets real talk. More structure, more insight, more of the good stuff on love, dating, and tools we need to build a healthy relationship. Awesome guests. Less navel-gazing, more crowd-serving. This one’s for you.

The Angry Therapist Podcast

A 30-second, playful moment sparked this episode - and a reminder: love isn’t generic. We break down how to speak love so it lands without abandoning yourself, especially when partners differ.

What you’ll learn (10 takeaways):

 Love isn’t generic - different emotional blueprints

 How to avoid the “I’m giving everything, it’s still not enough” trap

 Building emotional safety so defenses drop

 Reducing resentment & energy burnout

 Deepening intimacy beyond the physical

 Faster conflict repair by making the nervous system feel safe

 Future-proofing with regular “What makes you feel most loved?” check-ins

 Co-regulation: why the right love calms insecure attachment

 Turning micro-moments into daily bonding rituals

 Why guessing breaks trust (love is a skill)

Try this today: Ask your partner, “What lands for you this week?” Then do one unexpected gesture in their way of receiving love (a short note, a quick chore, five phone-free minutes together, a gentle touch, a tiny gift).

If this helped, hit subscribe for practical, no-fluff relationship tools.Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Stop Guessing Their Love: Say What Lands

In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim takes you inside his personal journey of building a new life in Costa Rica - the highs, the lows, and the unexpected lessons about presence, clarity, and decision-making. From nausea-inducing dirt roads to perfect mornings surfing in Costa Rica, John unpacks how life-changing decisions aren’t made in one big moment… but in a collection of small ones.

You’ll learn:

 Why clarity about life, love, and career comes from moments, not constant certainty

 How to notice and “bank” the moments that matter when deciding whether to move abroad, who to love, or what path to take

 The challenges of living in Costa Rica - from unpaved roads to missing city comforts and the surprising joys that outweigh them

 How being present is the only way to truly capture moments (and how most of us miss them)

 Why life’s “yes” often comes from an accumulation of tiny affirmations rather than a single sign

Join the conversation! What moments have shaped your biggest life decisions? Have you noticed when your “piggy bank” of yeses finally tipped the scale? Share your story with us.

Like this episode? Please LIKE & FOLLOW for more unfiltered conversations about expat life, self-discovery, and building a life that actually feels like yours.

Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

From Nauseous Nights to Perfect Mornings | Life in Costa Rica

In today’s episode, John Kim answers raw, unfiltered listener questions on the theme of breakups and divorce — the things you’d never dare ask your therapist. 

Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sh*t You Wouldn’t Ask Your Therapist | The Truth About Breakups

In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim gets personal about the mother wound - how it quietly shapes our self-worth, love life, and sense of safety. From a surprising MDMA journey insight to stories about his Korean-American upbringing, John unpacks what it’s like to grow up without emotional warmth from mom - and how this absence leaves lasting imprints on both men and women.

You’ll learn:

 Why the mother wound isn’t just a “women’s issue”

 How emotional absence can be just as impactful as physical absence

 The different ways the mother wound shows up in men (approval seeking, caretaking confusion, fear of intimacy) and women (perfectionism, chronic self-doubt, boundary struggles)

 How it fuels unhealthy patterns like codependency, attachment insecurity, and emotional projection

 Practical steps for healing: naming the wound without blame, reparenting yourself, rewriting old relationship scripts, and doing inner child work

Join the conversation! Have you noticed the mother wound in your own relationships or self-image? What has helped you start to heal? Share your story with us.

Like this episode? Please LIKE & FOLLOW for more unfiltered conversations about love, identity, and the work of healing yourself from the inside out.

Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Loving Without Losing Me: Healing the Mother Wound

In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim unpacks the father wound - how it silently shapes our self-worth, relationships, and ideas of masculinity. Through raw personal stories and practical, street-level insights, he explores what it means to grow up with a “ghost father” and how both men and women can begin to heal.

You’ll learn:

 Why the father wound exists even if your dad was “there”

 How it shows up differently for men and women

 Why emotional absence can leave deeper scars than physical absence

 How it becomes a blueprint for love, power, and identity

 Practical ways to reparent yourself and break the cycle

Join the conversation! Do you think you have a father wound? How has it shown up in your relationships or self-image? Share your story with us.

Like this episode? Please LIKE & FOLLOW for more unfiltered conversations on relationships, self-worth, and the work of healing.

Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The Lie We Tell Men About Strength

In this episode, licensed therapists John Kim and Vanessa Bennett dive deep into healing, heartbreak, attachment styles, and codependency - all from the comfort of their bed. With real-life stories, practical insights, and the lens of depth psychology, they unpack what it really means to "heal" and why the journey is anything but linear.

You’ll learn:

 Why “healed” is a myth - and what healing actually looks like

 How depth psychology helps us make meaning from pain

 Why breakups hurt even when you’re the one who ends it

 The difference between codependency and true connection

 How to stop chasing love and start living your own life

Join the conversation! Have you struggled with anxious attachment or feeling responsible for everyone else’s emotions? What does healing mean to you? Drop a comment and share your take.

Like this episode? Please LIKE & FOLLOW for more unfiltered conversations on relationships, soul work, and the human experience.

Resources & Links:

Learn more about Vanessa HERE

Vanessa’s Inner Compass Academy HERE

Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Two Therapists in Bed Talk Breakups, Healing, and OnlyFans

In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim unpacks jealousy through raw personal stories and powerful insights. He dives into the emotional roots of jealousy, including insecurity, fear of abandonment, and core wounds — and offers real, practical tools to navigate it with compassion and clarity.

 You’ll learn:

 How jealousy actually protects us (until it doesn’t)

 The difference between healthy and toxic jealousy

 Why core wounds trigger jealousy more than reality does

 How to build trust and “jealousy-safe” relationships

Join the conversation! Share your thoughts or experiences with jealousy in the comments below. How do you handle jealousy in your relationships?

If you found value in this episode, follow the show and share it with someone who needs to hear this. For more insights on relationships, self-growth, and mental health, don’t miss upcoming episodes.

Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Love Doesn’t Kill Jealousy - It Listens to It

Today, John shares a personal take on creativity, productivity, and the pressures they carry. He explores how AI is reshaping the creative process, the quiet power of everyday moments, and why it's worth challenging traditional ideas of success. 

Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

My F*cking Feelings: An "Unproductive" Day

Today, John unpacks how childhood experiences shape our ability to express emotions and why traits often seen as flaws can actually be powerful strengths. He also highlights the importance of reframing our emotional narratives, building a strong support system, and embracing the messy—but meaningful—journey toward authenticity. 

Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠

Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠

Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're Not Too Much — They Just Weren't Equipped

Today, John unpacks the complex layers of attraction, emotional wiring, and how our childhood shapes the way we love as adults. He dives into the connection between self-worth and the partners we choose, and why so many of us find ourselves settling—in both relationships and careers.

Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠

Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠

Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why We Keep Chasing the Same Kind of Love

In this special episode of "It's Not Me, It's You," John and Vanessa host a live workshop and dive into topics they cover in their upcoming book: It's Not Me, It's You.

 
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It's Not Me, It's You: A Live Workshop

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