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10% Happier

Self-help for smart people. World-class insights and practices from experts in modern science and ancient wisdom. Hosted by veteran journalist and best-selling author, Dan Harris.

Ten Percent Happier with Dan Harris

A towering figure in the meditation world, Sharon Salzberg is part of a small group of people who helped bring meditation over from Asia to the United States. Growing up in New York City, Salzberg had a traumatic childhood and was a sophomore in college when an Asian philosophy class she chose sort of on a whim led her to find a personal and positive connection with Buddhist teachings and practices. Today, she is a meditation teacher, the cofounder of Insight Meditation Society and the author of nine books, including best-sellers "Lovingkindness," "Real Happiness" and "Real Happiness at Work." Salzberg sat down with Dan Harris to talk about her personal history, her meditation practice and her advice to beginners looking to start practicing.

Sharon Salzberg

My guest today makes a fascinating and potentially life-changing case. He argues that we need to reconsider how we view intelligence. He says that instead of viewing intelligence as the ability to think and learn, we should view it as the ability to rethink and unlearn. My guest, whose name is Adam Grant, says there is evidence that, in a fast-moving world, what he calls the “critical art of rethinking” can “position you for excellence at work and wisdom in life.” Not for nothing, in a world where many of us are stuck in our own information silos, the ability to rethink and open our minds may be one way we can dig ourselves out of our current societal divisions. Some of you may know Adam. He’s been on the show before. He’s an organizational psychologist, a TED speaker, a professor at Wharton, and the author of four New York Times bestselling books, including one that has had a big influence on me, called Give and Take, which is all about how generosity can contribute to professional success. I am happy to report that Adam has done it again: He has written a compelling and timely book. In this conversation, we talk about how to build the skill of rethinking; how the people who speak the most confidently are often the least competent; and what he calls the surprising upsides of imposter syndrome. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/adam-grant-321

The Joy of Being Wrong | Adam Grant

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers.
 
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A journalist explores one of humanity’s most brutal and unavoidable experiences.
 

 
Cody Delistraty is a writer and speechwriter, most recently working as the culture editor at the Wall Street Journal Magazine. He has written for The New York Times, The New Yorker, The Atlantic, and was the European arts columnist for The Paris Review. He has degrees in politics from New York University and in history from the University of Oxford. British Vogue named him a best young writer of the year, and he has given talks about art and creativity to companies like PwC. He lives in New York City.
 

 
In this episode we talk about:
 
 • Why our culture is so repressed when it comes to grief
 • We dive into the many experiments that Cody launched to help cope with loss; from book and laughter therapy, to psilocybin and AI
 • The concept of grief as an addiction 
 • The importance of rituals 
 • The scientific possibility of deleting our memories to avoid pain 
 • And how to live along side of grief when there is no cure
 

 

 
Related Episodes:
 
Abby Wambach On: Grief, Addiction, And Moving From External To Internal Validation
 
#583. Jennifer Senior On: Grief, Happiness, Friendship Breakups, and Why We Feel Younger Than Our Actual Age
 
Joe DiNardo, Grief and Meditation
 

 
Sign up for Dan’s newsletter here
 
Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok
 
Ten Percent Happier online bookstore
 
Subscribe to our YouTube Channel
 
Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes
 

 
Full Shownotes: https://happierapp.com/podcast/tph/cody-delistraty-872
 

 
Additional Resources:
 
Download the Happier app today: https://my.happierapp.com/link/download
 
The Grief Cure: Looking for the End of Loss

The Science Of Grief: What Helps, What Doesn’t, And Why We Don’t Talk About It Enough | Cody Delistraty

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers.
 
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Smart strategies that emerged from a brutal year. 
 

 
Sam Sanders is an award-winning reporter, radio host and podcaster. He co-hosts the podcast Vibe Check with Zach Stafford and Saeed Jones. He also currently hosts The Sam Sanders Show from KCRW. Check out the album he mentioned in the episode, Caroline Rose’s The Art of Forgetting. 
 

 
This is part 2 in a 3-part series we’re running on grief.
 

 
In this episode we talk about:
 
 • The fact that there is no right way to deal with grief 
 • The value of feeling your feelings — even though it sucks 
 • Why it can be helpful to take breaks from your grief without guilt
 • The importance of joy and play 
 • The changing nature of grief
 • What it means to be “anointed” by grief
 • And what it looks like to maintain a relationship with someone even after they’ve died
 

 

 
Related Episodes:
 
 How (and Why) to Hug Your Inner Dragons | Richard Schwartz Kryptonite for the Inner Critic | Kristin Neff The Voice in Your Head | Ethan Kross Jonathan Van Ness on Shame, Shopping, Bodies, and Hope 

 

 
Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here
 
Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok
 
Ten Percent Happier online bookstore
 
Subscribe to our YouTube Channel
 
Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes
 

 
Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/sam-sanders-873

How To Talk To Yourself When Things Suck | Sam Sanders

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers.
 
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A famed author and humorist takes a deep dive into grief (with Dr. Bianca Harris as co-host).
 

 
Sloane Crosley is the author of The New York Times bestselling books Grief Is for People, How Did You Get This Number, and I Was Told There’d Be Cake. She is also the author of Look Alive Out There, Cult Classic and The Clasp, both of which have been optioned for film. She served as editor of The Best American Travel Writing series and is featured in The Library of America's 50 Funniest American Writers, The Best American Nonrequired Reading, Phillip Lopate’s The Contemporary American Essay and others. She was the inaugural columnist for The New York Times Op-Ed "Townies" series, a contributing editor at Interview Magazine, and a columnist for The Village Voice, Vanity Fair, The Independent, Black Book, Departures and The New York Observer. She is a contributing editor at Vanity Fair. She has taught at Columbia University and The Yale Writers’ Workshop.
 

 
In this episode we talk about:
 
 • A series of consecutive losses that Sloane endured
 • The concept of cumulative grief 
 • Sloane’s version of the five stages of grief
 • Her beef with acceptance
 • Bibliotherapy as a source of healing
 • And much more
 

 
Related Episodes:
 
The Science Of Grief: What Helps, What Doesn’t, And Why We Don’t Talk About It Enough | Cody Delistraty
 
How To Talk To Yourself When Things Suck | Sam Sanders
 
#450. The Science of Loss and Recovery | Mary-Frances O’Connor
 

 
Sign up for Dan’s newsletter here
 
Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok
 
Ten Percent Happier online bookstore
 
Subscribe to our YouTube Channel
 
Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes
 

 
Full Shownotes: https://happierapp.com/podcast/tph/sloane-crosley-874
 

 
Additional Resources:
 
 • Download the Happier app today: 
https://my.happierapp.com/link/download Anxiety: The Missing Stage of Grief: A Revolutionary Approach to Understanding and Healing the Impact of Loss All My Puny Sorrows Otherwise: New & Selected Poems By Jane Kenyon

Tricky Questions About Grief: Is There A Right Way To Do It? What To Say To People In Grief? And Can You Grieve For Things? | Sloane Crosley

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers.
 
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The upside of the often misunderstood "tribalism".
 

 
Michael Morris is the Chavkin-Chang Professor of Leadership at Columbia Business School as well as a Professor in its Psychology Department. Outside of academia, Professor Morris has consulted with and conducted executive training workshops for hundreds of clients across the globe, including Fortune 100 firms, governments, and the Obama and Clinton campaigns. He lives in New York City. His latest book is called Tribal: How The Cultural Instincts That Divide Us Can Help Bring Us Together.
 
Related Episodes:
 
 How Turning Habits Into Rituals Can Help You At Home, At Work, And When You're Anxious | Michael Norton 

 
Sign up for Dan’s newsletter here
 
Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok
 
Ten Percent Happier online bookstore
 
Subscribe to our YouTube Channel
 
Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes
 

 
Full Shownotes: https://happierapp.com/podcast/tph/michael-morris-876

What Evolutionary Psychology Teaches Us About How To Influence People | Michael Morris

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers.
 
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How your blindspots hurt your decision-making— and how to fix it.
 

 
Anu Gupta is an educator, lawyer, scientist, and the founder and CEO of BE MORE with Anu, an education technology benefit corporation that trains professionals across corporate, nonprofit, and government sectors to advance DEIB and wellness by breaking bias. His work has reached 300+ organizations training more than 80,000 professionals impacting over 30 million lives. Gupta holds a JD from NYU Law, MPhil in Development Studies from Cambridge University, and BA in International Relations and Middle Eastern & Islamic Studies from NYU. As a gay immigrant of color, he came to the work of breaking bias after almost ending his life due to lifelong experiences with racism, homophobia, and Islamophobia. The realization that bias can be unlearned helped lead him out of that dark point and inspired a lifelong mission to build a global movement for social healing based on principles of mindfulness and compassion. A peer-reviewed author, he has written and spoken extensively, including on the TED stage, the Oprah Conversation, Fast Company, Newsweek, and Vogue Business. He is the author of Breaking Bias: Where Stereotypes and Prejudices Come From—and the Science-Backed Method to Unravel Them.
 

 

 

 
In this episode we talk about:
 
 • The 5 causes of bias
 • The dis-utility of shame
 • What has – and hasn’t – been working in DEI trainings
 • Contemplative practices, on and off the cushion, for breaking bias
 • And his response to skeptics 
 

 

 
Related Episodes:
 
 Why You‘re Not Seeing the World Clearly— and How to Fix It | Jessica Nordell The Self-Interested Case for Examining Your Biases | John Biewen Dolly Chugh, How Good People Fight Bias Rhonda Magee, Law Professor Using Mindfulness to Defeat Bias How to Call People In (Instead of Calling Them Out) | Loretta Ross 

 

 
Sign up for Dan’s newsletter here
 
Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok
 
Ten Percent Happier online bookstore
 
Subscribe to our YouTube Channel
 
Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes
 

 
Full Shownotes: https://happierapp.com/podcast/tph/anu-gupta-877

How To Unsubscribe From The Negative Stories You Tell About Yourself And Others | Anu Gupta

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers.
 
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Dan and Executive Producer, DJ Cashmere, pull back the curtain on what we do, how we do it—and what’s coming next.
 

 
In this episode we talk about:
 
 • An exciting New Year's series reveal and upcoming meditation challenge
 • What goes into making the show–and why we do it
 • The ins and outs of starting a new business
 • And much more
 

 
Sign up for Dan’s newsletter here
 
Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok
 
Ten Percent Happier online bookstore
 
Subscribe to our YouTube Channel
 
Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes
 

 
Full Shownotes: https://meditatehappier.com/podcast/tph/bts-878

Behind The Scenes Of The 10% Happier Podcast + A Sneak Preview Of Something Big

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers.
 
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Equanimity: what it is, what it isn’t, and how to get it. 
 
Guest Kamala Masters was one of the teachers at Dan’s first ever meditation retreat. In this episode she dives into how to develop equanimity and shares her story of learning how to practice meditation during her everyday life while raising three children on her own. 
 
Kamala Masters has been meditating since the 1970s, first with Anagarika Munindra, who was Joseph Goldstein’s first teacher, and then with the Burmese master Sayadaw U Pandita with whom she twice temporarily ordained as a Buddhist nun. More recently, she’s been training with another Burmese master we’ve talked about here on the show, Sayadaw U Tejaniya. She is a Guiding Teacher at the Insight Meditation Society, and the co-founder of the Vipassana Metta Foundation, which developed the Maui Dharma Sanctuary.
 
In this conversation we talk about: 
 
 • What is equanimity?
 • The most common misconception about equanimity
 • The near and far enemies of equanimity 
 • The power and limitations of setting intentions
 

 
Full Shownotes: https://meditatehappier.com/podcast/tph/kamala-masters-rerun
 
Where to find Kamala Masters online: 
 
Website: Vipassana Metta on Maui
 
Additional Resources:
 
Download the Happier Meditation app today.

How To Be Okay No Matter What | Kamala Masters

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers.
 
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Can mindfulness really pull you out of a spiral of self-judgment? Don’t you need to be judgmental sometimes? What’s the difference between being discerning and judgmental?
 

 
Description: 
 
Meditation and mindfulness doesn’t uproot your capacity to be judgmental, but it can help you see the value in being judgmental by learning how to work with the judging mind. 
 
La Sarmiento has been practicing Vipassana meditation since 1998. La is a mentor for the Mindfulness Meditation Teacher Certification Program, a teacher with Cloud Sangha, and a contributor to the Happier Meditation app.
 
In this episode we talk about:
 
 • How mindfulness can help us identify when we’re being judgmental
 • The difference between discernment and judgment
 • How it can be so delicious to be judgmental of others – but why it’s actually harmful to ourselves and others
 • The four questions to ask when we notice ourselves going into judgment mode 
 • How to operationalize the phrase “am I suffering right now?” 
 • Investigating the motivations behind striving for success 
 • Why owning up to being a jerk is sometimes the exact right answer
 

 
Full Shownotes: www.meditatehappier.com/podcast/tph/la-sarmiento-rerun-2024
 
Where to find La Sarmiento online: 
 
Website: www.lasarmiento.com
 
Additional Resources:
 
Download the Happier Meditation app today.

How To Be Less Judgmental (Of Other People – and Yourself) | La Sarmiento

Why are so many of us having such weird dreams these days? How do we successfully interact with family members while on lockdown? Are we all experiencing some sort of trauma? These are just some of the questions with which we grapple during this discussion with Dr. Mark Epstein. It is no exaggeration to say that Mark has played a pivotal role in my life. My then-fiancé (and now wife), Bianca, gave me one of Mark's books (called Going to Pieces Without Falling Apart) back in 2009, and it genuinely changed my life. It was my first introduction to Buddhism. And to hear someone with actual medical experience (Mark is a Harvard-trained psychiatrist) extol the virtues of meditation made me reconsider a practice I had long considered ridiculous. In this chat, we also talk about blurring the line between meditation and therapy, and the profound value of not taking yourself too seriously. Enjoy. Where to find Mark Esptein online: Website: http://markepsteinmd.com/ Twitter: @Mepstein108 / https://twitter.com/Mepstein108 Facebook: Mark Epstein, MD / https://www.facebook.com/markepstein108/ Book Mentioned: The Trauma of Everyday Life / https://www.amazon.com/Trauma-Everyday-Life-Mark-Epstein/dp/0143125745 Other Resources Mentioned: Joseph Goldstein / https://www.dharma.org/teacher/joseph-goldstein/ Roberth Thurman / https://bobthurman.com/ Ram Dass / https://www.ramdass.org/ Samuel Beckett / https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Samuel_Beckett Jack Kornfield / https://jackkornfield.com/ Additional Resources: Ten Percent Happier Live: https://tenpercent.com/live Coronavirus Sanity Guide: https://www.tenpercent.com/coronavirussanityguide Free App Access for Teachers, Healthcare, Grocery and Food Delivery, and Warehouse Workers: https://tenpercent.com/care Get more focus and clarity by bringing mindfulness to your company with a team subscription to Ten Percent Happier! Visit tenpercent.com/work to learn more. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/mark-epstein-247

Weird Dreams, Family Relationships, and Collective Trauma | Dr. Mark Epstein

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