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Jamison Dance and Dave Smith

It takes more than great code to be a great engineer. Soft Skills Engineering is a weekly advice podcast for software developers about the non-technical stuff that goes into being a great software developer.

Soft Skills Engineering

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

 1. 

I am a first time caller and full time listener of your show.
 2. 

I was released from prison a year ago and I coded for 18 years straight on all sorts of stacks as part of my job requirements in the pen. Imagine the irony when I discovered what codepen was.
 3. 

A dev told me about an opening for full remote/full stack web dev at their company. I’ve used the tech stack before but I have a non-traditional background to say the least. I’m not worried about being qualified but I have never worked in a team and I have always been responsible for production.
 4. 

I work for a large retailer in a non-coding role. I’m also doing some freelancing on upwork/fiverr, but the pay is low and the jobs are not fulfilling. I was self-employed before I was incarcerated and I know how to beat the pavement and get small time work, but this is an opportunity to work at a real software house. I don’t even care if it’s a feature factory, I just have loved coding since I was 14.
 5. 

What do I do? I am confident in my skills and ability to deliver under pressure (in a place that has pressures you can’t imagine). I have a cover letter, but a bad resume and no open source projects from this millennium. I do have a reference - a Captain I worked for said he was willing. However, the opportunity was unexpected and I have not prepared anything.
 6. 

The dev who brought me the offer was a casual friend in IRC and he told me that my resume was mentioned in some meeting. I know you have suggested in previous shows that having someone get your foot in the door is the best way but I really think that feels gross to me.
 7. 

Anyways, longtime listener of your show and first time caller. In fact, when I was in prison, a few years before I was released we finally got tablets with an incredibly limited amount of content. Your show was one of a few on coding but I really enjoy your take on the soft skills because even though I worked in a non-traditional environment, teamwork was always the focus and I listened to everything from square one (took me a long time to get there).
 8. 

So thank you for your podcast you don’t know how many times I could sit in my cell listening to your show and disappear from my cage.
 9. 

Sincerely,
Names have been change to protect the guilty
 10. 

 11. 

Second time caller from NYC! I previously wrote in as an 18-year-old CS graduate (Episode 332).
 12. 

I’ve focused intensely on work for the past 4 years, consistently working 60+ hours per week.
 13. 

I always assumed that this approach to life would eventually bear fruit, but a couple months into turning 20, I’m realizing that I haven’t really done anything memorable besides work (which is a scary realization at 20).
 14. 

While I like working hard and want to ensure the success of the company I work for, I also want to feel like I am living. How have you struck the balance between work and non-work in your lives, and how has that related to the culture of the company you were working for at the time? I should also mention the company I work for (early stage, well funded) does have a culture where it’s expected to work everyday, and 60 hours is approximately the minimum expected.
 15.

Episode 438: Software job after prison and working 60 hours per week at age 20 and feeling unfulfilled

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

 1. 

What advice would you give for working with an ineffective leader whose input is crucial to your work? I’m a senior developer for a mid-sized non-tech company with probably 60-80 devs, and in the past year I’ve been working more with a VP of software who seems to still be involved in code details, getting pulled in to production issues, in-person code reviews, etc.
 2. 

He’s a nice guy, but he seems like he’s being pulled in too many directions at once. When he schedules a meeting, there’s a 50% chance it happens on that day and time, and when we do have meetings, if we bring up questions and high level issues we need feedback on he’s quick to “take ownership” and say he’ll do X and Y. Inevitably, X and Y slip down the priority list because production issues and who knows what else, and we’re stuck waiting weeks on end for something that if he’d just delegated the work to someone else, we’d have long since moved on. But we still need his input to shape our work. How can we as lower-level developers (with a manager who isn’t involved in this project at all) help mitigate these delays?
 3. 

 4. 

I’ve recently accepted a new position after spending more than three years at my first job out of college. Currently, I’m a Senior Engineer at a large, corporate-like company (300+ people), but my new role will be at a much smaller startup (20-30 people).
 5. 

I’m excited about the change but also a bit nervous, as I know startups can be fast-paced, and I’ll need to get up to speed quickly.
 6. 

What advice do you have for setting myself up for success in this new role—both before I start and after I begin? I have a couple of weeks before my start date and want to use that time to prepare effectively.
 7.

Episode 439: Harried VP of Eng and first startup job

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

 1. 

Stefan
 2. 

Help! Most of the time people ask questions about issues that already happened. I however, would like to prevent one.
 3. 

I am a young Tech Lead and really love my responsibilities, team and especially my manager. With the help of your podcast I could even resolve my last issue regarding compensation. Of course I dutifully did my part and reallocated some of my payment increase to finance Jamisons yacht.
 4. 

My very awesome manager “Bob” is so great that he has to manage 4 teams. Naturally, because Bob and those 4 teams are doing great, Bob gets rewarded with even more work. In his “free time” Bob is a parent of two teenagers which is also not necessarily known for being a stress free environment.
 5. 

Lately I noticed that Bob is more stressed than usual. Bob told me that he wakes up in the middle of the night because he remembers missed TODOs in the job. I also see this change in his body language and general demeanour.
 6. 

Now that a very critical project is coming up, Bob, as the go to person for more work has to allocate a significant time of his day to support this project.
 7. 

I fear that Bob is on a path to burnout and this new project might be the last drop. I would really hate to get a different manager. Statistics claim it will probably be worse… Also I really wish for Bob to be well and health, too. ;)
 8. 

How can I help Bob in his situation? How do I address those concerns with him without looking condescending? We have a good and open but not close relationship, that I would not like to ruin by overstepping my bounds.
 9. 

Thank you very much. I love the podcast. You make me laugh and learn with every single episode. You rock!
 10. 

 11. 

I am a very young senior engineer at a big tech company and I think nobody really knows how young I actually am. I just turned 24 and usually in prior jobs other developers started hating me once they found out that I am this young and already in a senior role. Here at the current place, I have the feeling that all of the engineers in levels below me are already a lot older and have more years of experience under their belt. Also, I think they do not know about my age, because I never shared that in the recruiting process, nor later on. Usually people assume I am in my early 30’s and have a baby face, but when I tell them that I am a baby face because I am actually young, they become envious and things go south from there. Should I keep this a secret or am I playing too much into this?
 12. 

PS: I am also already married and have kids, so that could make them assume that I am older.
 13.

Episode 440: How do I help my boss not burn out and should I tell people I'm older than I am?

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

 1. 

I’m currently in the interviewing pipeline for an engineering position at a fairly large healthcare company. In light of the recent events surrounding UnitedHealthcare, there’s been renewed criticism towards the insurance industry as whole. I was interested in this position and the work culture seems good, but now I’m having second thoughts. If I were to accept an offer from this company, could it somehow negatively affect my career or reputation? I feel like I’m worrying over nothing, but let me know your thoughts. Also, hypothetically speaking, what would you do if you received a job offer at a company that recently had negative press?
 2. 

 3. 

Hi! I’m an internal applications engineer, and after a couple of years of propping up a couple of different small and midsized companys’ intranets with duct tape and cardboard, digging through old, unmaintained code that nonetheless runs the business, and trying to decipher the intentions and reasonings of the Developers Who Came Before, I have landed what is perhaps the dream position: the primary internal applications developer at my new company is retiring, and the business has hired me on such that we have a few months for said senior developer to catch me up and hand things off.
 4. 

I’ve been brought through the basics; how to troubleshoot day-to-day misshaps, which clients need to be handled with care, and I’ve been shown the excel workbook that will make the finance department explode if it’s edited incorrectly. What other non-technical questions should I ask my senior before he leaves?
 5. 

Thanks and thanks also for an awesome show!
 6.

Episode 441: Will working in healthcare hurt my reputation and precious wisdom

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

 1. 

I would like your advice on how I can improve my communication skills. I realize that practicing is usually the best way, but I am interested in taking online courses or learning more on becoming a better communicator. However, I am currently taking courses in CS and would like to primarily focus on that. I’m wondering what your thought are, especially when it comes to investing time in either a community college or online extension course.
 2. 

 3. 

I have to make a confession. I am a job hopper, never staying longer at a job than a year. I am getting bored quickly, I always get the feeling of the grass is greener on the other side and I keep finding myself distracted from my current job always thinking of the next step, the next job, the next big thing.
 4. 

This feeling is a double edged sword. On the one hand I know that I am aware that this repeated behaviour is not sustainable and healthy. On the other hand it helped me progress extremely in my career and climb the ladder quickly and now after five years of experience I landed at big tech in my dream job role. But I still get this old feeling of planning the next thing, finding myself distracted and losing interest and not being satisfied.
 5. 

I want to stay at the job and keep earning the big bucks for my family. What can I do to get rid of the grass is greener syndrome?
 6.

Episode 442: Improving communication skills and how to break my job hopping habit

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

 1. 

I think my team’s PM might hate me. Hate is exaggerating, but they often will give public praise to other members of my team on work they’ve done, and seem to be pretty friendly with others, but I have never gotten the same treatment. I have also not gotten negative feedback from them in the 3 years we’ve worked together, so I don’t really have any information to go off of here.
 2. 

I don’t need everyone to like me, but it feels weird to see someone act nice with everyone else and relatively cold with me. I get along pretty well with everyone else on the team, too. Would you do anything in this situation or just try to ignore it?
 3. 

 4. 

I’m a newly minted senior engineer and frequently pair with other more junior engineers to help them when they run into issues. Along with my company-provided senior engineer hat, my manager has asked me to try to take on more of a vested role in mentoring other engineers.
 5. 

One engineer I regularly assist seems to have anxiety issues. When I start reviewing their code or ask them about their debugging steps, they almost always start the conversation by telling me they’re nervous. I usually reassure them that we’re all teammates, we have a shared goal and there’s no judgement - only a desire to help them resolve whatever issue they’re encountering. While this does help somewhat, they continue to show clear signs of anxiety. I’ve also noticed the same behavior during team code reviews.
 6. 

They’ve been here for over a year, and I feel bad that they still seem to be struggling. I’d like to offer some sort of suggestion or guidance. What’s the best way to approach this? Would recommending therapy be out of line? Should I talk to my manager, or would it be better to leave it alone entirely?
 7.

Episode 443: Does my PM hate me? and My coworker has anxiety when I help

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

 1. 

After a decade as a Senior front-end engineer in companies stuck in legacy ways of working—paying lip service to true agility while clinging to control-heavy, waterfall practices—I’m frustrated and exhausted by meetings and largely apathetic, outsourced teams who don’t match my enthusiasm for product-thinking or improving things. It seems allowed and normalised everywhere I go.
 2. 

How can I escape this cycle of big tech, unfulfilled as an engineer, and find a team with a strong product engineering culture where I can do high-impact work with similarly empowered teams?
Thank you, and sorry if this is a bit verbose! Thanks guys.
Martin
 3. 

 4. 

‌
 5. 

How do you judge your competency in a technical skill and when should you include it on your resume? Should you include a skills that you haven’t used in a while, skills you’ve only used in personal projects, or skills that you feel you only have a basic understanding of?
 6. 

I’m a frontend developer and I’ve seen some job descriptions include requirements (not nice-to-haves) like backend experience, Java, CI/CD, and UI/UX design using tools like Figma and Photoshop. I could make designs or write the backend code for a basic CRUD app, but it would take me some time, especially if I’m building things from scratch. I’ve seen some resumes where the writer lists a bunch of programming languages and technical skills, and I often wonder if they truly are competent in all of those skills.
 7.

Episode 444: Surrounded by apathetic coworkers and put it on my resume?

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

 1. 

A listener named Kevin asks,
 2. 

Hey, found the show and really enjoy it! Been listening from the beginning and have noticed that one of the pieces of advice given is that you should not stay at your first job for too long, because it’s more likely that you’ve not found the best job for you. I think The Secretary Problem is the closest thing being cited.
 3. 

I tend to agree with the math, but I’m still at my first software engineering job after 5 years and don’t really want to leave. There are obviously things I don’t particularly like or people I find challenging, but for the most part, I work on interesting projects with smart people, it’s fully remote, the benefits are great, and my salary is comfortable. There have been times where I started to look for another job, only to have my current circumstances improve enough that I stopped the search.
 4. 

What advice do you have for someone like me?
 5. 

I don’t know if it’s relevant, but I’ve managed to get married, buy a house, and just recently had our first baby. The pressure to provide and be conservative with my career is building.
 6. 

Again, love the show and I hope you’ll get to answering this before I catch up. I started from the beginning in late 2024, and in mid Jan 2025, I’m just past episode 50. I’ll let you do the math.
 7. 

 8. 

As a tech lead, I joined a project two years in the making which had only one engineer doing everything, including management. In the two years, only a POC has been completed and a “pre MVP-MVP” build is in progress. There is a hangup though, the funding for the project is supposed to come from another departments budget that doesn’t want it, and work was committed by the department I am in, and a third department intended to be completed by the end of the quarter.
 9. 

I have been trying to finesse my teammate into cancelling the project or at least allow a resetting of expectations. My manager agrees with me. There seems to be a tug of war between AVPs and Directors. This has led my teammate to make some corporate aggressive comments. These are being directed in many directions, including department heads opposing the project.
 10. 

In your professional space experience, how can I help my teammate with understanding that his tactics are potentially damaging to his reputation and the project?
 11.

Episode 445: Staying at my first job and my coworker is insulting other departments

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

 1. 

A listener named Matthias (mah-TEA-as) asks,
 2. 

In episode 444 you’re talking about the problems when hiring in the age of AI. I’m a manager who’s trying to hire right now and frankly I’m at a loss. If feels like I’m wading through a sea of AI slop. What tips do you have to cut through the slop and reach actually good candidates?
 3. 

 4. 

Where I work the developers do not seem to “get” source code control systems like git. I’m not a developer but have worked with developers at previous jobs and usually the developers instituted good source control practices themselves.
 5. 

Our developers know they should push their code to the repo but only do it weekly/monthly, treating it as a “backup”. Some back up their laptops using tools like Time Machine so think have taken care of safeguarding their source code that way.
 6. 

How can I convince them that working in git, committing their code as they go, pushing regularly, branching/merging, tying code updates to tickets, etc will benefit them far more in the long run?
 7.

Episode 446: Wading through AI slop and they don't get git

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

 1. 

I am a mid level engineer overleveled as a senior engineer in a FAANG company. I got super lucky landing this high paying remote job, but dang… I did underestimate the expectations for my senior level. I had no FAANG experience before, just working at startups, flat hierarchies, just doing the heavy lifting coding.
 2. 

Now it is all about impact and multiplying impact across the team. I am told I should do less IC work and more leading of projects and owning initiatives.
 3. 

Can you give me some general advice on what actions I can take to get from the mid-level to senior-level? I am not really sure, what taking ownership really means in practice… These just seem like empty phrases to me without a meaning…
 4. 

 5. 

I have had a bit of time, while running a 40 minute build, so I looked into open pull requests. One PR caught my eye and I started to read through it and left a comment with a suggestion for a small change. All in all sounds good probably, but the caveat to this is, that the PR was marked as Draft.
 6. 

I was thinking that it would be useful for the author of the PR to already get some suggestions during development, but the response got me thinking. The author passive aggressively mentioned that the PR is in Draft and that there is more work to do.
 7. 

Am I the jerk for commenting on a draft PR? Second question, what other things should I pay attention to in code reviews to not be a jerk?
 8.

Episode 447: Overleveled at FAANG and accidental draft feedback

This week Jamison and Dave answer these questions:

 1. 

We have a great intern, who is smart and has good ideas but is also very quiet.
 2. 

She’s got a great deal of potential, and I want to tell her that being more vocal and assertive can help her greatly, both in her career and in life.
 3. 

How can I give her this feedback, without it sounding like a criticism of her personality, or her introverted tendencies?”
 4. 

 5. 

Recently a team member was let go. I am the team lead so I played a role in their termination. While they weren’t a good fit for the team, I’d still like to be in touch and help them improve their skills. Should I steer clear of this? My gut says yes but my heart says no.
 6.

Episode 97: A Quiet Intern and Hearts and Guts

Lyt når som helst, hvor som helst

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