How to Talk to Teens About Sex

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In this Sex with Emily episode, Dr. Emily brings on sex educator Dr. Emily Nagoski for a live conversation—and they get brutally honest about their own sex lives falling apart.

Why even bestselling sex experts lose their desire—and how Dr. Emily's nervous system was so shot she didn't even want orgasms.

The myth that kept her terrified to stop sex once it started: believing "blue balls" required hospitalization—and the truth that you can stop and start anytime.

A parent worried their college-age kids aren't having sex or relationships—the questions to ask instead of pushing sex on them, and why nobody dies from not having sex but people do die from loneliness.

The most important thing parents can do around sexuality: unlearn your own shame first—because your embarrassment when they ask questions teaches them more than any words ever could.

The reframe for anyone struggling with desire: what you actually want when you want sex (it's not orgasm—you can do that alone), and what you don't want when you don't want sex.

Timestamps:

0:00 - Intro

2:10 - The Five R's Framework for Difficult Conversations

4:58 - How Phones Are Destroying Teen Connection & Intimacy

7:08 - Talking to Kids About Porn: The Social Justice Approach

10:12 - What to Do When Your Kid Watches Porn (Real Parent Story)

14:34 - The Power of Repair in All Relationships

20:30 - Navigating Gender, Pronouns & Sexual Identity with Kids

28:26 - Why We Need to Stop Gendering Empathy

34:00 - Raising Sexually Healthy Humans Without Being Weird

38:30 - My Teenager Found My Vibrator: What Now?

39:46 - Five Quickfire Questions on Sex & Relationships