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ABC Australia

All In The Mind is ABC RN's weekly podcast looking into the mental universe, the mind, brain and behaviour — everything from addiction to artificial intelligence.

All In The Mind

How do you grieve a dying parent you're estranged from? Do cheaters ever change? People say love should feel 'easy', is that true?

Psychotherapist Esther Perel is back on All in the Mind, answering your questions about heartbreak, loss, and love in this extra special mailbag episode.

We've got questions on how to reconnect with estranged siblings, what to do when global conflicts impact personal relationships, and whether a first love can still feel special, even if it happens later in life.

And if you missed part one of our chat with Esther Perel, you can listen to our episode titled "Couples therapy with an AI partner? Esther Perel's just done it" here.

Esther also featured on our first episode of Mind Hacks!

Guest:

Esther PerelPsychotherapist and couples therapistAuthor, The State of Affairs and Mating in CaptivityHost, Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

Credits:

 • Presenter/producer: Sana Qadar
 • Senior producer: James Bullen
 • Producer: Rose Kerr
 • Sound engineer: Roi Huberman

More information:

If you want to hear more from Esther Perel, she chatted to Lisa Leong on This Working Life. The episode is called Esther Perel on conflict and power struggles at work.

You can catch up on more episodes of the All in the Mind podcast with journalist and presenter Sana Qadar, exploring the psychology of topics like stress, memory, communication and relationships on ABC Listen or wherever you get your podcasts.

Family estrangement and infidelity: Esther Perel answers your questions

Welcome back to All in the Mind's little sister: Mind Hacks. In this episode, cognitive neuroscientist Joel Pearson tells us how he manages his own stress (clue: it involves saunas!)

Each week on Mind Hacks, we're bringing you bonus content with special guests, featuring rapid fire questions about their mental health tips and pet peeves. It's like a psychology version of eff, marry kill!We're going to test this format out over the next few weeks, so let us know what you think, or if there's a guest you'd like us to invite back on the program for Mind Hacks. As always, you can reach us on allinthemind@abc.net.auAnd don't worry, regular All in the Mind episodes will keep dropping every Sunday.

Guest:

Professor Joel PearsonPsychologist, neuroscientistFounder and Director, Future Minds LabUniversity of New South Wales

Credits:

 • Presenter/producer: Sana Qadar
 • Senior producer: James Bullen
 • Producer: Rose Kerr
 • Sound engineer: Harvey O'Sullivan

Relevant All in the Mind episodes:

Is AI making our brains lazier?

"Scarier than killer robots": why your mind isn't ready for AI

When to trust your gut instinct, and when to ignore it

You can catch up on more episodes of the All in the Mind podcast with journalist and presenter Sana Qadar, exploring the psychology of topics like stress, memory, communication and relationships on ABC Listen or wherever you get your podcasts.

Mind Hacks: Joel Pearson

Social media gave us brain rot; will AI give us cognitive atrophy? How can we possibly learn to cope with the sheer amount of uncertainty and change heading our way?

Cognitive neuroscientist Joel Pearson is back on the show, two years after his mega popular appearance in our episode titled "Scarier than killer robots": why your mind isn't ready for AI.In this episode we cover the potential long-term impact of widescale job losses, the anxiety university students are feeling about their job prospects, the risk of cognitive atrophy when outsourcing to AI, and what we can do to be more adaptable and flexible in the age of AI.

You can catch up on more episodes of the All in the Mind podcast with journalist and presenter Sana Qadar, exploring the psychology of topics like stress, memory, communication and relationships on ABC Listen or wherever you get your podcasts.

Guest:

Professor Joel PearsonPsychologist, neuroscientistFounder and Director, Future Minds LabUniversity of New South Wales

Credits:

 • Presenter/producer: Sana Qadar
 • Senior producer: James Bullen
 • Producer: Rose Kerr
 • Sound engineer: Tim Jenkins

More info:

When to trust your gut instinct, and when to ignore it

Why being a beginner is good for you

Is AI making our brains lazier?

Introducing All in the Mind's little sister: Mind Hacks. Each week, we'll bring you bonus content with special guests, featuring rapid fire questions about their mental health tips and pet peeves. It's like a psychology version of eff, marry kill!Kicking off our first episode is none other than Esther Perel. What mental health advice would she avoid at all costs?We're going to test this format out over the next few weeks, so let us know what you think, or if there's a guest you'd like us to invite back on the program for Mind Hacks. As always, you can reach us on allinthemind@abc.net.auAnd don't worry, regular All in the Mind episodes will keep dropping every Sunday.

Guest:

Esther PerelPsychotherapist and couples therapistAuthor, The State of Affairs and Mating in CaptivityHost, Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

Credits:

 • Presenter/producer: Sana Qadar
 • Senior producer: James Bullen
 • Producer: Rose Kerr
 • Sound engineer: Michael Grossman

You can catch up on more episodes of the All in the Mind podcast with journalist and presenter Sana Qadar, exploring the psychology of topics like stress, memory, communication and relationships on ABC Listen or wherever you get your podcasts.

Mind Hacks: Esther Perel

Psychotherapist and relationship expert Esther Perel has had a lot of 'firsts' over her four decade-long career — counselling her first polyamorous relationship, or her first gay couple navigating surrogacy. Now, she's just done her first session with a man and his AI 'girlfriend'…

Did she struggle to take this ‘couple’ seriously? What kind of love can someone really form with a chatbot? And why would someone bring their AI partner to a relationship therapy session in the first place?This week, renowned psychotherapist, author, and speaker Esther Perel reflects on what’s changed in the decades she's worked as a relationship therapist; whether AI can be a helpful tool for therapy; and why we might be better off conceptualising AI companions as ‘transitional objects’ instead. Plus, join us in a few week's time for a very special mailbag episode with Esther, featuring your questions!

Guest:

Esther PerelPsychotherapist and couples therapistAuthor, The State of Affairs and Mating in CaptivityHost, Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

Credits:

 • Presenter/producer: Sana Qadar
 • Senior producer: James Bullen
 • Producer: Rose Kerr
 • Sound engineers: Harvey O'Sullivan and Emrys Cronin

You can catch up on more episodes of the All in the Mind podcast with journalist and presenter Sana Qadar, exploring the psychology of topics like stress, memory, communication and relationships on ABC Listen or wherever you get your podcasts.

Couples therapy with an AI partner? Esther Perel's just done it

Developmental paediatrician Dr Billy Garvey is returning to All in the Mind and we'd love to ask him your questions!

Billy is an expert on kids' mental health — last time he was on the show we discussed what's really going on with kids who are labelled "bad"; including insecure attachment, separation anxiety and emotional difficulties. 

He co-hosts Pop Culture Parenting and is the author of Ten things I wish you knew about your child's mental health.

So if you have any questions you'd like to put to Billy, send them to allinthemind@abc.net.au and include "question for Dr Billy Garvey" in the subject line.

And if you're looking for inspiration, you can find Dr Billy Garvey's previous episode here.

Thanks!

 - Sana and the All in the Mind team

We want your parenting questions

The siren has sounded. The scores are even. A footy player has one final chance to kick an easy goal to get his team into the finals.

He's right in front of the goals. He lines up. Kicks. Misses. The pressure of such a moment was phenomenal, and the player choked under it.

So what happens in the brain during such intense periods? Why can some people remain calm while others can't handle it?

This episode first aired in July 2024.

Guests:

Caroline AndersonPerformance psychologistLead psychologist for the Paris 2024 Australian Olympic Team

Dr Chris MesagnoSenior lecturer in sport and exercise psychology, Victoria University

Louise PotterFootballer and Darebin Falcons legend

Mary SpillaneClinical psychologist

Credits:

 • Presenter: Sana Qadar
 • Reporter/Producer: Belinda Smith
 • Producer: Rose Kerr, Petria Ladgrove
 • Sound engineer: Russell Stapleton

To view the transcript for this episode, head to its original webpage.

You can catch up on more episodes of the All in the Mind podcast with journalist and presenter Sana Qadar, exploring the psychology of topics like stress, memory, communication and relationships on ABC Listen or wherever you get your podcasts.

Why do we choke under pressure?

40 years ago, NASA experienced one of its most devastating disasters.

The Challenger space shuttle disintegrated just 73 seconds after launch, killing all seven crew members.

How had this happened? And did the culture of NASA have anything to do with it?

In this episode, we dig into a concept called 'normalisation of deviance', which has been touted as an explanation for this incident, as well as the Costa Concordia cruise ship disaster and a clinical drug trial that left six people in intensive care.

So what is 'normalisation of deviance'? How does it happen? And given its potential for harm, is there anything we can do to prevent it?

If you enjoyed this episode, check out the latest season of Science Friction, The Challenger Disaster (which is also produced by our senior producer James Bullen!)

Guests:

Dr Nejc SedlarLecturer, University of Aberdeen

Professor Sidney DekkerProfessor, Griffith University

Credits:

 • Presenter: Sana Qadar
 • Senior producer: James Bullen
 • Additional reporting/production: Fiona Pepper
 • Producer: Rose Kerr
 • Sound engineer: Roi Huberman

You can catch up on more episodes of the All in the Mind podcast with journalist and presenter Sana Qadar, exploring the psychology of topics like stress, memory, communication and relationships on ABC Listen or wherever you get your podcasts.

More information:

A qualitative systematic review on the application of the normalization of deviance phenomenon within high-risk industries.

Sidney Dekker — Drift into Failure.

Challenger: the disaster five people saw coming.

The Challenger Legacy — Science Friction.

Has NASA learned anything from the Challenger disaster?

When to trust your gut instinct, and when to ignore it

A deviation from standard design? Clinical trials, research ethics committees, and the regulatory co-construction of organizational deviance

Can 'normalisation of deviance' help to explain a catastrophe?

Renowned psychotherapist Esther Perel is coming to All in the Mind! And we'd love to ask her some of your questions.

Esther Perel is an internationally recognised couples therapist. You might know her as the author of Mating in Captivity and The State of Affairs. Family, sex, intimacy, friendship, betrayal - Esther covers it all. 

So if you have any thorny relationship questions you'd like to ask her, send them to allinthemind@abc.net.au and include "question for Esther Perel" in the subject line.

Thanks!

Got a question for Esther Perel?

Slow walkers. Unmelted cheese in a toastie. Bad formatting in documents. 

If these small annoyances make you weirdly mad, you're not alone (in fact, you're human). But when little pet peeves add up, they can contribute much bigger problems like chronic stress. So what can you do about it?

Today: why small annoyances have such an outsized impact; why judging yourself doesn't help; and how elements of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) can help you better navigate these moments (as well as the bigger challenges in life).

And if you're not a fan of radical acceptance, which was covered in a recent episode, we go deeper on what it really means.

You can catch up on more episodes of the All in the Mind podcast with journalist and presenter Sana Qadar, exploring the psychology of topics like stress, memory, communication and relationships on ABC Listen or wherever you get your podcasts.

Guest:

Dr Patricia Zurita-OnaClinical psychologistAuthor

Credits:

 • Presenter/producer: Sana Qadar
 • Senior producer: James Bullen
 • Producer: Rose Kerr
 • Sound engineer: Roi Huberman

More information:

Relationship of daily hassles, uplifts, and major life events to health status

The peculiar longevity of things not so bad

Patricia's website and resources

Other recommended listening:

Chronically stressed? These small changes can help

Difficult people and radical acceptance: answering your questions about tricky relationships

The paradox of petty problems: Why small annoyances can snowball

What does it take to go from second place, to first? Good, to great?

This is part one of our two parter on performance psychology.

A winning mindset — how top athletes think

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