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YMH Studios

Weekly, comedian best friends Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer get together in the bear cave at YMH Studios to do what bears do: make each other laugh.

2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

SPONSORS:
- Don’t miss out on all the action this week at DraftKings! Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up using https://dkng.co/bears or through my promo code BEARS.
- Don’t let financial opportunity slip through the cracks, get half off your first year with promo code BEARS at https://www.monarchmoney.com/bears
- As always, get your first month of BlueChew FREE Just use promo code BEARS at checkout and pay five bucks for shipping. https://bluechew.com 
- Sponsored by BetterHelp. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at https://betterhelp.com/bears
- Download the CFO’s Guide to AI and Machine Learning at https://NetSuite.com/BEARS.

We're sorry, guys! Tom and Bert are back in the cave with a full plate: Druski’s viral NASCAR “whiteface” sketch and the art of deep-cover character work, a big “Would you die for your country?” debate, and discuss why streaming giants (Kai, Adin, Jack, etc.) have completely remixed entertainment. Plus, Tom relives an electric college football weekend (FSU at home against Alabama = goosebumps), Bert admits he tried to move a 400-lb armoire and declared himself top 0.5% strong in the city, and the guys hatch a chaotic million-dollar plan to manage an OnlyFans creator—will it work? Is white-face really back? Is Bert making things up? Watch and find out! 

2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 305

https://tomsegura.com/tour
https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour
https://store.ymhstudios.com

Gambling problem? Call one eight hundred Gambler. In New York, call eight seven seven eight HOPENY or text HOPENY (four six seven three six nine). In Connecticut, Help is available for problem gambling. Call eight eight eight seven eight nine seven seven seven seven or visit https://ccpg.org. Please play responsibly. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (Kansas). Twenty-one plus age and eligibility varies by jurisdiction. Fees may apply in Illinois. Void in Ontario. Bonus bets expire seven days after issuance. See https://sportsbook.draftkings.com/promos. NFL Sunday Ticket offer for new subscribers only and auto-renews until cancelled. Digital games and commercial use excluded. Restrictions apply. Additional NFL Sunday Ticket terms at https://youtube.com/go/nflsundayticket/terms. Limited time offer.

Chapters 
00:00:00 - Intro
00:01:30 - Druski Doing White Face
00:10:54 - Streamers Ruined The Military
00:17:32 - Would You Die For Our Country?
00:26:25 - Kam Patterson
00:33:20 - Another Tour
00:38:25 - College Football Weekend
00:49:42 - Let's Become OF Boosters
00:59:17 - Bert's Fight With LeeAnn
01:05:28 - Wrap Up

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Is White-Face Cool Again? | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

SPONSORS:
- Don’t miss out on all the action this week at DraftKings! Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up using https://dkng.co/bears or through my promo code BEARS.
- For simple, online access to personalized and affordable care for Hair Loss, ED, Weight Loss, and more, visit https://Hims.com/BEARS
- Upgrade to ShipStation today to get a sixty-day free trial at https://www.shipstation.com/cave 

Bert and Tom are BACK in the Cave! After a memorable summer takeover by Stavvy and Chrissy D, the OG Bears return to catch up on everything—movies, standup, gambling, insane diets, and why Bert can’t stop eating 10 egg bites at once. Tom opens up about his recent cancer-screening scare, which led to a brutal five-day water fast, and accidentally dropping 25 pounds while filming El Tigre. Bert shares why his watch doesn’t fit anymore, how he tormented his director by throwing Liquid Death cans at 4 AM, and the disgusting way he measures his weight.
The Bears also dive into the future of late-night TV, Amy Poehler’s move into podcasting, their own TV and film projects, and Bert’s insane plan to bet $1,000 every week on the Bucs. Plus: family visits on set, Isla living like a diva in Bert’s trailer, Tom’s boys discovering fake cocaine, and both Bears gearing up for the upcoming NFL and NCAA football seasons! 

2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 304

https://tomsegura.com/tour
https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour
https://store.ymhstudios.com

Gambling problem? Call one eight hundred Gambler. In New York, call 8778HOPENY or text HOPENY (four six seven three six nine). In Connecticut, Help is available for problem gambling. Call eight eight eight seven eight nine seven seven seven seven or visit ccpg.org. Please play responsibly. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (Kansas). Fees may apply in IL. Twenty-one plus age and eligibility varies by jurisdiction. Void in Ontario. Bonus bets expire seven days after issuance. See sportsbook dot draftkings.com/promos. NFL Sunday Ticket offer for new subscribers only and auto-renews until cancelled. Digital games and commercial use excluded. Restrictions apply. Additional NFL Sunday Ticket terms at https://youtube.com/go/nflsundayticket/terms . Limited time offer.

Chapters 
00:00:00 - Intro
00:00:07 - The Final Episode Of 2 Bears
00:09:36 - Tom's New Movie & Free Bert
00:21:47 - Why Tom Got So Skinny
00:33:23 - Bert Is Fat
00:42:04 - Family Visits + America's Team
00:45:48 - Bert's Big Bet
00:54:05 - Is Tom Down?
00:58:49 - A Bert Game Show?
01:01:45 - Wrap Up
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Gambling With Our Lives | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

Stavros Halkias Tickets: http://stavvy.biz/tour

Chris Distefano Tickets: https://www.chrisdcomedy.com/tickets

SPONSORS:

- Eat smart at https://FactorMeals.com/bears50off and use code bears50off to get 50% off your first box, plus Free Breakfast for 1 Year.

- Order a bottle of Por Osos and some killer merch online https://drinkporosos.com

The Summer Bears’ reign has unfortunately come to an end! Stavros Halkias and Chris Distefano return for their last fill-in as hosts of 2 Bears 1 Cave, and they’re going out with a bang. From roasting Tom and Bert’s absence to spiraling into wild tangents about parenting, moving, sex robots, and pie diplomacy with the NYPD, this send-off is chaotic, hilarious, and the perfect finale.

Stavvy and Chrissy talk about the shock of how much fans loved their takeover, whether they’d ever come back as the Fall Bears, and even get Bert on the phone. Tom of course doesn’t pick up. But that's okay, because Mark Normand and Sam Morril crash the party near the end, bringing eclairs and stomach bugs to help close things out.

It’s been a wild six weeks, and the Summer Bears want to leave you with one last memory. You're welcome, f*ckers!

2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 303

https://tomsegura.com/tour

https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour

https://store.ymhstudios.com

Chapters 

00:00:00 - Intro

00:01:01 - The Summer Bears' Last Dance 

00:10:10 - Stoic Shit + Jump Scare Ad Break

00:17:14 - Moving Around & Finding Peace

00:24:12 - Bribing Cops With Pie & Being Addicted To Losing

00:33:06 - ChatGPT Sex Robots

00:41:26 - Swingers & Phoning It In With Bert

00:55:22 - Mark Normand & Sam Morril
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The Summer Bears Phone It In w/ Stavros Halkias & Chris Distefano | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

Stavros Halkias Tickets: http://stavvy.biz/tour

Chris Distefano Tickets: https://www.chrisdcomedy.com/tickets

SPONSORS:

 
Our listeners get 10% off their first month at https://betterhelp.com/bears

 
Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at https://shopify.com/bears.

 
If you’re 21+, try VIIA! For 15% off AND a free gift with your first order head to https://viia.co/BEARS and use code BEARS! #viiaparter

 
Head to https://acorns.com/BEARS or download the Acorns app to get started.

Stavros Halkias and Chris Distefano return for another sugar-fueled Summer Bears meltdown—this time with bagels, tiramisu, and enough food guilt to keep a Catholic therapist booked for years. The boys break down Chris’ ChatGPT pep talk, reminisce about Stavvy's golden toothless years, and spiral into a deep dive on Neapolitan ice cream fraud, gay NFL cheerleaders, and the politics of bagel orders. Also: Chris reveals his VO2 Max results from a flamboyant fitness coach who may or may not have called him “zaddy.”

2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 302

https://tomsegura.com/tour

https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour

https://store.ymhstudios.com

Chapters 

00:00:00 - Intro

00:01:00 - 2 Pigs, 1 Pen

00:12:45 - Catholic Guilt Vs Greek Shame

00:23:33 - Sexual Awakenings In Mom's Bed

00:30:31 - A Demeaning Offer & ChatGPT Pep Talk

00:43:50 - Social Media & Rage For The Gays

00:52:01 - Men In Women's Sports

01:00:02 - Zaddy Chris
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Audience Is Gonna Hate Us w/ Stavros Halkias & Chris Distefano | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

SPONSORS:
- Upgrade your wardrobe and save on @trueclassic at https://trueclassic.com/BEARS! #trueclassicpod 
- For simple, online access to personalized and affordable care for Hair Loss, ED, Weight Loss, and more, visit https://Hims.com/BEARS

The Summer Bears are back and Chris Distefano and Stavros Halkias are fully locked into their takeover of 2 Bears 1 Cave. With Stav in a floral shirt and Chris squeezed into a Darryl Strawberry jersey, the two dive headfirst into tales of the wild ‘86 Mets, Kevin Spacey offering unsolicited shoulder rubs, and the horrifying science of ALS—because what’s funnier than degenerative nerve disease? Stavvy also gets a massage from Chrissy, we learn about Lenny Dykstra's podcast rates, and the guys debate polyamory, prostitutes, and just how many years Bert Kreischer has left.

Speaking of Bert, he sends the guys a morbid video asking them to predict which comedian friends are not long for this world. Plus, Stav makes a strong case for becoming a Japanese-style husband, Chris recounts a near-affair that lasted 12 seconds on the LIRR, and together they fantasize about future threesomes with suspiciously supportive fans.

Is it a good episode? No. Is it packed with fake current events, conspiracy theories, open marriages, and physical touch? You bet your bottom dollar it is.

2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 301

https://tomsegura.com/tour
https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour
https://store.ymhstudios.com

Chapters 
00:00:00 - Intro
00:01:42 - Baseball Greats, Kevin Spacey, & ALS
00:10:31 - Reading Fan Comments
00:27:20 - Swingers, Cucks, & Flirty Fans
00:36:33 - Montreal Screwjobs & Polyamory Shenanigans
00:44:58 - Trisha Paytas Baby Theory
00:51:34 - Comedian Death Pool
01:00:49 - Chrissy Massages Stavvy
01:07:23 - Wrap Up

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

2 Bears, 1 Happy Ending w/ Stavros Halkias & Chris Distefano | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

Become a paid channel member of YMH to get 2 Bears, 1 Cave episodes one day early and AD-FREE here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCYIgiXwJck_Pb5Nj-wIrsqg/join

SPONSORS:
-Get control of your overall finances with Monarch Money. Use code BEARS at http://monarchmoney.com for half off your first year
-Our listeners get 10% off their first month at https://betterhelp.com/bears
-Go to https://bluechew.com to get your first month of BlueChew FREE! Just use promo code BEARS at checkout and pay five bucks for shipping.
-If your revenues are at least in the seven figures, download the free e-book “Navigating Global Trade: 3 Insights for Leaders” at https://NetSuite.com/BEARS .

The Summer Bears are back and sweatier than ever as Stavros Halkias and Chris Distefano return to the Cave for a milestone 300th episode that somehow combines deep psychological trauma, ass-eating, and cholesterol awareness in one glorious mess. Chrissy D reveals his shocking bedtime history with his mom, his late-night transition out of her bed, and how a surprise with a tongue changed the trajectory of his life—and his act. Stav explains how a 3XL shirt, childhood grilled cheese binges, and SNL reruns turned him into the hairy Greek sex symbol we know today.
The bears also dive into the state of late night TV (RIP), Jurassic Park boners, and why Bert and Tom might end up bankrupt with nothing but podcast houses and Uncrustables to their name. Plus, an unhinged Monarch Money ad read, BlueChew boners, Turkish military anal policies, and a heartfelt video message from Tom Segura himself. Are the Summer Bears destined to do this foever? Stay tuned!

2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 300

https://tomsegura.com/tour
https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour
https://store.ymhstudios.com

Chapters 
00:00:00 - Intro
00:03:58 - Big Boy Shirts
00:10:15 - Tongue Punch Your Fartbox
00:19:21 - How Did This All Happen?
00:23:48 - Sleeping In Mom's Bed
00:37:17 - Stavvy's Hangups & Chrissy Late Night
00:48:27 - Bowel Movements & Old Sitcoms
00:54:39 - Stav & Chrissy's Movie Corner
01:00:47 - New Jurassic Park
01:05:01 - A Message From Tom Segura
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are We Trapped In This Podcast Forever? w/ Stavros Halkias & Chris Distefano | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

Check out our new summer merch at https://store.ymhstudios.com/

SPONSORS:
- Eat smart at https://FactorMeals.com/bears50off and use code bears50off to get 50 percent off plus FREE shipping on your first box. 

Stavros Halkias and Chris Distefano are back for round two of Summer Bears—and things spiral immediately. Dressed in their finest “Queens County court appearance” outfits, the guys dive into tales of impersonating cops, awkward court appearances, and Chris’s brief career as a physical therapist (and even briefer run-in with medical malpractice).

The bears get uncomfortably honest about massages that went too far, AI-generated thirst traps, and whether or not Bert and Tom make smashable women. Plus: Stav drops knowledge about Benjamin Franklin’s revolutionary sexcapades, Chris reflects on losing MSG (but gaining perspective), and both dudes debate the pros and cons of fake tits, handy wives, and aging out of horniness.
It’s unhinged, unfiltered, and definitely leading to the hosts getting fired.

2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 299

https://tomsegura.com/tour
https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour
https://store.ymhstudios.com

Chapters 
00:00:00 - Intro
00:01:08 - Chrissy Court Date
00:06:15 - From Physical Therapy To Comedy
00:18:25 - Happy Ending
00:28:45 - Lady Tom & Bert
00:34:32 - Female Stavvy & Chrissy
00:43:55 - Handy Women & Unhandy Men
00:53:07 - Benjamin Franklin
00:58:32 - MSG
01:03:36 - Wrap Up

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This Episode Is Getting Us Fired w/ Stavros Halkias & Chris Distefano | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

Check out our new summer merch at https://store.ymhstudios.com/

SPONSORS:
- Upgrade your wardrobe and save on @trueclassic at https://trueclassic.com/BEARS! #trueclassicpod 
- Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at https://shopify.com/bears
- Sponsored by BetterHelp. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at https://betterhelp.com/bears

Tom and Bert are out for the summer, so Chris Distefano and Stavros Halkias are stepping in as your substitute Bears. In this unhinged takeover, they immediately derail the show with tales of cholesterol-fueled delusion, Nazi neighbors in Queens, circumcision conspiracies, radical acceptance, berberine powder, and why 4th of July is the real American holiday (sorry January 6).

The boys debate who’s the Bert and who’s the Tom in their pairing, accidentally rank the world’s races, and somehow end up talking about diabetes, Greek shame, and Japanese war crimes—all before diving into engagement stories, dad stress, and the magic of getting fat on purpose. Also, Bert checks in from his deathbed to interrupt and tells them to talk about Indian people. This episode is chaos in shorts. True summer vibes. No lessons, no structure—just greasy hot dogs, high blood pressure, and fat guy fun. It's going to be a wild summer!

2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 298

https://tomsegura.com/tour
https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour
https://store.ymhstudios.com

Chapters 
00:00:00 - Intro
00:02:00 - Who's The Tom & Who's The Bert?
00:08:23 - The Gay Family Man
00:13:56 - Bert's Request 
00:21:43 - My War Criminal Neighbor
00:27:19 - Epstein Lists, Toothless Looks, & Fat Guy Speedballs 
00:34:49 - We're Just Slowly Dying 
00:45:19 - Fourth Of July 
00:53:33 - Radical Acceptance
00:58:53 - Chrissy D's Favorite Holiday
01:05:11 - Wrap Up

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Summer Bears Takeover! w/ Stavros Halkias & Chris Distefano | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

SPONSORS:
- Start your free online visit today at https://Hims.com/BEARS.
- Go to https://quince.com/bears for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns.
- Get up to $200 off Square hardware when you sign up at https://square.com/go/bears! #squarepod 
- Order a bottle of Por Osos and some killer merch online https://drinkporosos.com

This week on 2 Bears 1 Cave, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer go deep on sports. They talk about Brett Favre's fall from grace, the greatness of the 2001 Baltimore Ravens, the unbeatable aura of Tony Siragusa, and the dynamic duo of Caitlin Clark and Sophie Cunningham. Before that, Bert shares some stories about going over to T-Pains house. The bears also discuss how violence has made the WNBA more watchable, how good the ESPN "30 For 30" documentaries are, and the most unbelievable races people participate in. Plus: Bert tells a story about how he almost chainsawed a leg off on skates, the Red Bull Flutag, rat catchers, Bert's chicken murder mystery, and more!

2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 297

https://tomsegura.com/tour
https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour
https://store.ymhstudios.com

Chapters 
00:00:00 - Intro
00:01:17 - T-Pain
00:10:08 - Brett Favre: Hero Or Villain?
00:19:15 - Tony Siragusa & The 2001 Baltimore Ravens 
00:30:38 - Caitlin Clark & Sophie Cunningham
00:37:58 - Bert Almost Lost A Leg Skating 
00:42:28 - Red Bull Flutag 
00:49:23 - The Most Insane Race
00:57:11 - Rat Collectors 
01:05:54 - Chicken Murder Mystery 
01:11:02 - Wrap Up

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Catfights Make The WNBA Interesting | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

SPONSORS:
- Order on DoorDash and save big during Summer of DashPass. Sign up today! DashPass benefits apply only to eligible orders. Terms apply.
- Sponsored by BetterHelp. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at https://betterhelp.com/bears
- Make life easier by getting harder and discover your options at https://BlueChew.com! And we’ve got a special deal for our listeners: Try your first month of BlueChew FREE when you use promo code BEARS -- just pay $5 shipping.
- If your revenues are at least in the seven figures, download the free e-book “Navigating Global Trade: 3 Insights for Leaders” at https://NetSuite.com/BEARS
- Get a 60-day free trial at https://www.shipstation.com/cave Thanks to ShipStation for sponsoring the show!

This week on 2 Bears 1 Cave, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer reunite in sunny California for a jam-packed episode full of FOMO, fatherhood, and flaming hot air balloon disasters. The bears talk about Tom’s California vacation and getting into surfing with his boys. They dig into wild parenting comparisons, Luis J. Gomez’s insane training routines, and Bert feeling FOMO for Andrew Schulz’s perfect summer life on Instagram.

Tom then drops major news about shooting a new Netflix movie called El Tigre, which leads to Bert sharing his own plans for filming the series Free Bert in Atlanta. With both Bears tied up all summer, they announce special "Summer Bears" episodes and name the two hosts Chris Distefano and Stavros Halkias. Things get political (kind of) as Bert and Tom debate who should talk about world issues—spoiler alert: it’s not them. Bert then rants about the sheer terror of hot air balloons and Tom tells another legendary Top Dog tale about how he diverted a plane so he could take a piss. Buckle up—it’s a bumpy (and hilarious) ride.

2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 296

https://tomsegura.com/tour
https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour
https://store.ymhstudios.com

Chapters 
00:00:00 - Intro
00:00:40 - Father FOMO
00:05:07 - The Summer Bears 
00:16:45 - FaceTiming Chrissy D
00:20:16 - The Middle Class Of Comedy 
00:33:09 - Bert Explains Global Politics
00:39:48 - Hot Air Balloons Are Sketch 
00:49:29 - Crazy Plane Stories
01:00:17 - Helicopters 
01:06:45 - Uber Driver Smackdown

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Summer Bears Phone It In w/ Stavros Halkias & Chris Distefano | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

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