The Science of Love, Desire and Attachment - Psychology vs your Biology

Love isn’t just a feeling, it’s a pattern. And patterns, when understood, can be changed.

We are the descendants of beings who bonded, lusted, and survived—not by chance, but by biology.

In this episode, we explore the elegant architecture of love, divided into three distinct experiences: lust, attraction, and attachment.

Each has its own hormonal symphony: testosterone’s drive, dopamine’s thrill, oxytocin’s warmth. But these chemicals, while essential, are not our destiny. We must choose how we respond to them.

The opportunity lies in seeing love not just as passion, but as a practice—a practice of self-awareness, empathy, and intentionality.

Reframe love from chaos to conscious experience.

Observe your emotions without becoming them.

Build connection that outlasts dopamine spikes.

Your biology is the system, but your awareness can evolve it.

How to Change the World

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Growth Mindset Psychology:

Sam Webster explores the psychology of happiness, satisfaction, purpose, and growth through the lens of self-improvement.

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Show: Growth Mindset, psychology of self-improvement

Episode: The Science of Love, Desire and Attachment - Psychology vs Biology

Chapters:

00:00 The 3 main components of love

01:27 Biology of Love

02:33 Lust and the role of sex hormones

05:42 Attraction and reward pathways

08:25 Attachment and bonding hormones

10:37 Love's addictive power and irrationality

11:44 Infatuation, dependence and controlling behaviours

12:51 Reckless and destructive tendencies

14:11 How we lose rational thinking

16:46 Choosing the right partner

18:02 Cultivating healthy relationship habits

18:23 Send Off Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices