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Dave Stachowiak

Leaders aren’t born; they’re made. Many leaders reach points in their careers where what worked yesterday doesn’t work today. This Monday show helps leaders thrive at these key inflection points. Independently produced weekly since 2011, Dr. Dave Stachowiak shares insights from a decade of leading a global leadership academy, plus more than 15 years of leadership at Dale Carnegie. Bestselling authors, proven leaders, expert thinkers, and deep conversation have attracted 50 million downloads and over 300,000 followers. Join the FREE membership to search the entire leadership and management library by topic at CoachingforLeaders.com

Coaching for Leaders

JP Elliott: Future of HR

JP Elliott has decades of experience as a Talent and HR executive at companies like DICK’S Sporting Goods, McAfee, and Lenovo. He’s seen the challenges HR professionals face in growing their careers and increasing their impact. He is the host of the Future of HR podcast and on a mission to help HR professionals increase their business impact and accelerate their careers.

Leadership looks a little different if you head up a support role: human resources, IT, marketing, or finance. Often, we hear the term “business partner” used to describe what these leaders should be aiming for. In this conversation, JP and I explore how to shift from simply a “business partner” to a value creator.

Key Points

 • You’re not just an HR leader. You’re a business leader with HR expertise.

 • Think like a CEO even if you’re in HR. Do this to be moving beyond an execution-only mindset.

 • Design talent strategies based on the future, not on the past.

 • Build systems that reward outcomes, not bureaucracy.

 • Build talent strategies that differentiate your business.

 • Forecast leadership needs 3-5 years out and build a pipeline for critical roles.

Four questions that CEOs are asking:

 1. Are we focused on the right strategic imperatives?

 2. Are we operating effectively and efficiently?

 3. Are we optimizing our business model to create competitive advantage?

 4. Do we have a plan for sustainable and profitable growth?

Resources Mentioned

Future of HR podcast • by JP Elliott

Interview Notes

Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

How to Start Managing Up, with Tom Henschel • (episode 433)

How to Solve the Toughest Problems, with Wendy Smith • (episode 612)

The Mindset to Help Your Organization Grow, with Tiffani Bova • (episode 633)

Discover More

Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

768: Evolving from Business Partner to Value Creator, with JP Elliott

Graham Allcott: KIND

Graham Allcott is an author, speaker, entrepreneur, and the founder of Think Productive, a leading provider of training and consultancy. He is the author of multiple books, including the bestseller How to Be a Productivity Ninja and his latest book, KIND: The Quiet Power of Kindness at Work (Amazon, Bookshop)*.

“Nice” means telling people what they want to hear. “Kind” means telling them what they need to hear. The best leaders are kind. In this conversation, Graham and I explore how we can do a better job of following through.

Key Points

 • “Nice” means telling people what they want to hear, whereas “kind” means telling them what they need to hear.

 • Kindness is both concern for others and concern for self. Just like with salted caramel, it’s best with the right balance.

 • Leaders often do better articulating vision and values than they do with getting clear on expectations of value each person should provide.

 • Being clear is an act of kindness in itself because it drives psychological safety.

 • Use a personal mantra as a concise and powerful way to consistently remind people about what’s most important.

 • Invite others to “give the last 20%” in feedback to uncover areas where clarity would help.

Resources Mentioned

KIND: The Quiet Power of Kindness at Work • by Graham Allcott (
Amazon • , 
Bookshop • )*

Rev Up for the Week • (Graham’s newsletter)

Interview Notes

Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

Five Steps to Hold People Accountable, with Jonathan Raymond • (episode 306)

How to Build Psychological Safety, with Amy Edmondson • (episode 404)

How to Give Feedback, with Russ Laraway • (episode 583)

Discover More

Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

767: Being Nice May Not Be Kind, with Graham Allcott

Ruth Gotian: Networking in the Age of AI

Ruth Gotian is the former Chief Learning Officer and Associate Professor of Education in Anaesthesiology at Weill Cornell Medicine. Thinkers50 has ranked her the #1 emerging management thinker in the world, and she’s a top LinkedIn voice in mentoring. She’s the author of The Success Factor and, with Andy Lopata, The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring.

Most of us recognize the value of building a better network, but we also know the time and dedication it takes. In this conversation, Ruth and I explore how we can use AI tools to do some of the administrative legwork so that we can spend more time on the real relationship-building.

Key Points

 • McKinsey reports that since the pandemic, most people’s networks have shrunk or stalled.

 • Consider the 90/9/1 rule: 90% of people lurk in online communities, 9% interact somewhat regularly, 1% post and lead the conversation.

 • Use AI to enhance, not replace, your communications. Invite AI to do the administrative legwork (i.e. brainstorming, proofreading) so you focus on the human aspects.

 • Ask AI to analyze speaker and attendee lists in advance at conferences in the context of your goals.

 • Consider being the person that puts together an in-person dinner or gathering at a conference. Use AI to help you prep questions and discover the best people to invite.

 • Ask AI to help complete your LinkedIn profile. An All-Star LinkedIn profile makes it substantially more likely that you’ll get surfaced to others.

Resources Mentioned

Networking in the Age of AI • by Ruth Gotian

Related Episodes

How to Grow Your Professional Network, with Tom Henschel • * (episode 279)

How to Build a Network While Still Doing Everything Else, with Ruth Gotian • * (episode 591)

The Key Elements of a Powerful Personal Brand, with Goldie Chan • * (episode 757)

Discover More

Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

766: Using AI to Make Networking Easier, with Ruth Gotian

Marty Dubin: Blindspotting

Martin Dubin is a clinical psychologist, serial entrepreneur, business coach, and adviser to C-suite executives and Silicon Valley entrepreneurs. He has founded several companies, including a multimillion-dollar health-care company where he also served as CEO. He is the author of Blindspotting: How to See What’s Holding You Back as a Leader (Amazon, Bookshop)*.

Whenever I ask leaders, “What’s getting in the way of you moving forward?” the most common answer I hear is, “Myself.” In this episode, Marty and I explore what’s likely holding you back and how you can take the first steps to get traction.

Key Points

 • Many leaders don’t recognize the need for change and succumb to an identity blindspot.

 • You don’t have to change your identity, but there’s a mismatch between role and identity, that’s a major problem.

 • Shifting your identity is not changing who you are. Identities help us to sort through people and situations so we know who we are in relation to them.

 • An identity that many have worked before can get in the way today. Common ones are: imposter, independent thinker, rule follower, unworthy, entitled, rebel, and peacemaker.

 • Look back through your calendar over the past three months and determine how well your activities match up with the identity your role demands.

 • Embody the new identity you are aiming to shift to, even if you’re not yet feeling it.

Resources Mentioned

Blindspotting: How to See What’s Holding You Back as a Leader by Marty Dubin • (
Amazon • , 
Bookshop • )*

Interview Notes

Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

Six Questions Every Leader Should Ask Themselves, with Margaret Andrews • (episode 750)

How to See What Others Miss, with Kirstin Ferguson • (episode 758)

Show Up Better, Faster, with Claude Silver • (episode 762)

Discover More

Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

765: How to See What’s Holding You Back, with Marty Dubin

Elizabeth Lotardo: Stop Solving Your Team’s Problems for Them

Elizabeth Lotardo is a consultant, writer, and online instructor who helps organizations drive emotional engagement. Elizabeth writes for Harvard Business Review, is a Top Voice on LinkedIn, and the author of Leading Yourself: Find More Joy, Meaning, and Opportunities in the Job You Already Have. She’s also the author of the Harvard Business Review article, Stop Solving Your Team’s Problems for Them.

Jumping in to solve problems feels like we’re doing important work. The issue is that leaders need to be enabling work – both for scale and to grow the skills of others. In this conversation, Elizabeth and I detailed how to get out of the trap of solving your team’s problems for them.

Key Points

 • Jumping in to solve a problem feels good in the moment for both parties, but creates long-term obstacles.

 • The other extreme, asking people to only come with solutions, often shuts down learning for both parties.

 • Shifting a habit of solving your team’s problems will feel awkward at first – both for your team and you.

 • Rather than solving the problem for them, help remove the obstacle.

 • Support doesn’t just have to come from the manager. Often, looking at the situation together will help surface what kind of support would actually help.

 • We often assume that people are coming to us for answers. Sometimes, they just need to be heard.

Five questions that will help your team step up:

 1. What have you tried?

 2. What–or who–is getting in the way of tackling this?

 3. What support do you need?

 4. What would you do if you were in my seat?

 5. Is there anything else I should know?

Resources Mentioned

Stop Solving Your Team’s Problems for Them • by Elizabeth Lotardo

Leading Yourself: Find More Joy, Meaning, and Opportunities in the Job You Already Have • by Elizabeth Lotardo (
Amazon • , 
Bookshop • )*

Related Episodes

The Way to Stop Rescuing People From Their Problems, with Michael Bungay Stanier • (episode 284)

Where Senior Leaders Can Better Support Middle Managers, with Emily Field • (episode 650)

The Key Norm of a High-Performing Team, with Vanessa Druskat • (episode 753)

Discover More

Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

764: Stop Solving Your Team’s Problems, with Elizabeth Lotardo

Eileen Collins: Through the Glass Ceiling to the Stars

Colonel Eileen M. Collins, USAF (retired), earned a place in history as the first American woman to pilot, and later to command, a space mission. She flew on the space shuttle four times, twice as commander – including the 2005 “return to flight” mission after the tragic Columbia accident. She is the subject of the documentary movie Spacewoman and author of the book Through the Glass Ceiling to the Stars: The Story of the First American Woman to Command a Space Mission (Amazon, Bookshop)*.

We all have times in our careers where all eyes are on us. In this conversation, Eileen and I explore the critical moments of her career and how she stayed grounded while soaring among the stars.

Key Points

 • Until we are tested, we don’t know what we are capable of.

 • Nerves creep in at times for all of us. When they do, it’s helpful to think about representing your role instead of representing yourself.

 • When decisions become difficult, always come back to, “What’s the mission?”

 • Train for the skill, not for the task.

 • During high-stakes times, remember your family and personal life. They will help you stay grounded.

Resources Mentioned

Through the Glass Ceiling to the Stars: The Story of the First American Woman to Command a Space Mission • by Eileen Collins (
Amazon • , 
Bookshop • )*

Spacewoman documentary • , featuring Eileen Collins

Interview Notes

Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

How to Lead and Retain High Performers, with Ruth Gotian • (episode 567)

The Way to Handle Q&A, with Matt Abrahams • (episode 681)

How to Start the Top Job, with Scott Keller • (episode 752)

Discover More

Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

763: Leading with Poise When the Stakes are High, with Eileen Collins

Claude Silver: Be Yourself at Work

Claude Silver is on a mission to revolutionize leadership, talent, and workplace culture. She is Chief Heart Officer at VaynerX and partners with CEO Gary Vaynerchuk to drive their success. Claude has earned Campaign US’s Female Frontier Award, and AdWeek’s Changing the Game Award and she’s the author of Be Yourself at Work: The Groundbreaking Power of Showing Up, Standing Out, and Leading from the Heart (Amazon, Bookshop)*.

We’ve all heard the advice to be ourselves at work. It’s easier said than done. In this conversation, Claude and I explore how we can actually move past some of the unhelpful self-talk so that we can show up better, faster.

Key Points

 • We all have songs that play in our heads. When the song isn’t working, it’s time to change it.

 • Labels are for soup cans, not people. Stop treating negative self-talk as gospel.

 • Begin by identifying the label you’ve put on yourself that’s harming you. When it’s hard to see a harmful label, use times of either reflection or agitation to help surface it.

 • Find the internal evidence for this label and record what confirms this belief and also what challenges it. If that’s hard, invite someone else (a partner, friend, or therapist) to help you see it more objectively.

 • Evolve by creating a new mantra for who you are becoming. If it doesn’t seem doable today, ask yourself if you can envision it being true in the future.

Resources Mentioned

Be Yourself at Work: The Groundbreaking Power of Showing Up, Standing Out, and Leading from the Heart • by Claude Silver (
Amazon • , 
Bookshop • )*.

Interview Notes

Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

How to Tame Your Inner Critic, with Tara Mohr • (episode 232)

How to Stand Up for Yourself, with Sunita Sah • (episode 715)

When It Feels Like You Don’t Belong, with Muriel Wilkins • (episode 756)

Discover More

Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

762: Show Up Better, Faster, with Claude Silver

Dave shares the results of the 2025 listener survey and previews what’s next for Coaching for Leaders. If you’re not already getting the weekly update and wish to receive Dave’s forthcoming FocusFive messages, join the free membership for access.

Listener Survey Results

Steve Blank: Blind to Disruption

Steve Blank is an Adjunct Professor at Stanford and co-founder of the Gordian Knot Center for National Security Innovation. Credited with launching the Lean Startup movement and the curriculums for the National Science Foundation Innovation Corps and Hacking for Defense and Diplomacy, he’s changed how startups are built, how entrepreneurship is taught, how science is commercialized, and how companies and the government innovate. Steve is the author of The Four Steps to the Epiphany and The Startup Owner’s Manual and is the author of his recent article at steveblank.com: Blind to Disruption: The CEOs Who Missed the Future.

Leaders may see the future coming, but we aren’t always incentivized to act on it. In this conversation, Steve and I discuss what we can learn from the common patterns of disruption so we don’t miss what’s next.

Key Points

 • In the 1890s, there were approximately 4,000 carriage and wagon makers in the United States. Only one company made the transition to automobiles.

 • In each of the three companies that survived, it was the founders, not hired CEOs, that drove the transition.

 • Studebaker recognized that it wasn’t in the business of carriages; it was in the business of mobility.

 • Clayton Christensen taught us that disruption begins with inferior products that incumbents don’t take seriously.

 • The real problem isn’t that companies can’t see the future. It’s that they are structurally disincentivized to act on it.

 • Parsing innovation theatre vs. innovation means paying attention to what’s actually shipping. If nothing is and you want to innovate, look elsewhere.

 • Bubbles in the market are normal. Timing may be off, but that doesn’t mean disruption isn’t happening.

Resources Mentioned

Blind to Disruption: The CEOs Who Missed the Future • by Steve Blank

Related Episodes

How to Start Seeing Around Corners, with Rita McGrath • (episode 430)

How to Build an Invincible Company, with Alex Osterwalder • (episode 470)

How to Pivot Quickly, with Steve Blank • (episode 476)

Discover More

Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

761: Notice Disruption and Innovate Through It, with Steve Blank

Shannon Minifie: Box of Crayons

Shannon Minifie is the CEO of Box of Crayons, a learning and development company that helps unleash the power of curiosity to create connected and engaged company cultures. They are the organization behind the bestselling book The Coaching Habit by Michael Bungay Stanier. Shannon and her team recently released a report along with the Harris Poll titled Navigating a Fractured Workplace: How Relational Curiosity increases engagement, trust, and productivity.

Of course, you’ve heard that being curious and coach-like will help in leadership. But sometimes the very thing we think we’re doing well is actually getting in the way. In this conversation, Shannon and I explore the kind of curiosity that leaders often miss.

Key Points

 • 5-6 hours of the average workweek is lost to the fear of making mistakes.

 • A strong majority of leaders say employees are expressing a desire for more feedback, and a majority also say that people are unable to receive hard feedback.

 • Relationships are the core of these conflicting messages. Without a relationship of trust, helpful feedback often doesn’t land that way.

 • Intellectual curiosity helps us learn what we don’t know. Relationship curiosity helps the other person learn what they don’t know.

 • Ask yourself: what is my goal in asking this question?

 • Rather than asking a question that starts with a “why,” consider asking a question that starts with a “what.”

The 7 Essential Questions:

 1. What’s on your mind?

 2. And what else?

 3. What’s the real challenge here for you?

 4. What do you want?

 5. How can I help?

 6. If you’re saying yes to this, what are you saying no to?

 7. What was most useful for you?

Resources Mentioned

Navigating a Fractured Workplace: How Relational Curiosity Increases Engagement, Trust, and Productivity • .

Interactive Learning Preview: Invest in the Power of Curiosity
The Coaching Habit • * by Michael Bungay Stanier

Interview Notes

Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

These Coaching Questions Get Results, with Michael Bungay Stanier • (episode 237)

How to Ask Better Questions, with David Marquet • (episode 454)

The Way to Be More Coach-Like, with Michael Bungay Stanier • (episode 458)

Discover More

Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

760: The Kind of Curiosity Leaders Often Miss, with Shannon Minifie

Dave speaks with Mel Rivera, an alum of the Coaching for Leaders Academy, on how she built visibility for her team.

Apply to the Coaching for Leaders Academy by Friday, September 12th.

Building Team Visibility, with Mel Rivera

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