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Todd and Cathy Adams

Zen POP is a podcast about understanding ourselves through the music, movies, and moments that shaped us. With a distinctly Gen X sensibility, we use pop culture as a mirror, reflecting our emotional patterns, relationships, blind spots, and where we’re still learning. Each episode starts with something we all know and love, then uses humor, memory, and shared reference points to go deeper into what we watch and listen to, what it reveals about us, and how those stories shape our relationships and our sense of self. We organize conversations into categories, themes, and “best of” lists because remembering together helps us understand ourselves more clearly. Listeners can also access Zen Parenting LIVE!, our premium podcast focused entirely on parenting and self-awareness, along with exclusive episodes and deeper connection with other Team Zen members. https://zenpopparenting.com/#team-zen

Zen Parenting Radio

Todd and Cathy discuss The Sure Thing (1985), Rob Reiner’s early, quietly subversive road-trip rom-com starring John Cusack as Gib Lloyd, a smart, restless college guy chasing a guaranteed hookup that slowly reveals itself to be hollow, alongside Daphne Zuniga’s Alison Bradbury, a sharp, principled counterpoint who refuses to play the “cool girl.” Set in a pre-internet, pre-cell-phone America, the film captures mid-80s college culture while exploring the tension between impulse and integrity, desire and discernment, with Anthony Edwards’ best friend serving as a cautionary caricature of male entitlement and Nicollette Sheridan’s “sure thing” functioning more as fantasy than human. They share why Reiner softened the original raunchy premise into something more meaningful and human, and how the movie quietly suggests that growth, conversation, and shared values are the real turn-ons. Todd and Cathy also dive into their regular categories, plus their five favorite John Cusack movies and their five favorite two-person road-trip films.

Say Anything

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

The Sure Thing- Episode #853

Cathy and Todd discuss Why Heated Rivalry Matters, digging into why this hockey romance has become such a cultural lightning rod and emotional touchstone. They talk about Rachel Reid’s novel and the TV adaptation, but mostly they focus on what’s really happening alongside the sex scenes: two very different expressions of masculinity learning how to coexist without hierarchy, punishment, or performance. The conversation moves from the slow-burn relationship between Shane and Ilya to why so many women, queer viewers, and romance fans trust this story and feel oddly comforted by it. They explore how the show models emotional safety, real repair, and power that doesn’t turn into harm, and why that feels rare right now. It’s a mix of pop culture, psychology, and cultural reckoning about intimacy, vulnerability, and what people are longing for in relationships today.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

Why Heated Rivalry Matters- Episode #852

Cathy and Todd discuss A Few Good Men, a courtroom drama set inside the military justice system about power, loyalty, and what happens when following orders starts to feel wrong. They go through their usual categories, talk about why the movie still works all these years later, and give props to Jo Galloway who was dismissed for being “too much,” yet was right all along. The share why this film hit so hard for people who grew up learning the rules and then had to decide when to question them. PLUS they spend the first 10 minutes discussing the Chicago Bears – Bear Down!

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

A Few Good Men Episode #851

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

Stranger Things Finale #850

We decided to re-run an old “Pop Culturing” Podcast in honor of the tragic death of Rob Reiner and his wife Michele. We will be creating 4 new Zen Pop Episodes based off of 4 other Rob Reiner films for the month of January. 

When Harry Met Sally… is a 1989 American romantic comedy film written by Nora Ephron and directed by Rob Reiner. It stars Billy Crystal as Harry and Meg Ryan as Sally. The story follows the title characters from the time they meet in Chicago just before sharing a cross-country drive, through twelve years of chance encounters in New York City. The film raises the question “Can men and women ever just be friends?” and advances many ideas about relationships that became household concepts, such as “high-maintenance” and the “transitional person”.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

When Harry Met Sally Episode #849

Cathy and Todd discuss Love Actually as part of their “Christmas movies that might not actually be Christmas movies” month. Released in November 2003 and written and directed by Richard Curtis, the film uses its London-at-Christmas setting, stacked ensemble cast, and interwoven stories of romantic, familial, awkward, and heartbreaking love to reflect a long-held worldview: messy humans and basic decency still matter. Cathy and Todd go through their categories, debate the storylines, and unpack why its message that “love is all around” became an annual ritual for so many—and what lands differently when we watch it now..

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

Love Actually – Messy Love Stories About Decent, Interconnected People Episode# 848

Cathy and Todd talk about The Family Stone and why it works so well as “a Christmas movie that isn’t really a Christmas movie”. They explore how it’s a story about family systems, grief, belonging, and what happens when someone new steps into a familiar and often fragile emotional ecosystem. They get into the best family movies, the most uncomfortable scenes, each character’s role, birth order patterns, sibling energy, and the tension Meredith brings into the house. They also look at why this messy and tender story is still such a holiday staple twenty years later.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

The Family Stone: A Movie About Change, Loss, and Letting People In Episode# 847

Cathy and Todd discuss Trading Places for “Christmas movies that might not be Christmas movies” month. John Landis’ 1983 comedy-satire dropped the same year as Return of the Jedi, Flashdance, WarGames, and Risky Business, yet still became one of the biggest hits of the year. With Dan Aykroyd, a very young Eddie Murphy (only 21!), Jamie Lee Curtis, and a plot that dives deep into class and privilege, they discuss what the movie was saying about wealth, meritocracy, and who gets access, along with the complicated, messy, and very 80s parts that would never make it past a studio today.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

Trading Places Episode# 846

Cathy and Todd discuss Die Hard, the 1988 action classic that redefined the genre, covering everything from its Christmas Eve plot and iconic Nakatomi Plaza setting to the film’s surprisingly heartfelt themes of family, reconciliation, and love. They discuss why so many (including Cathy) consider it a Christmas movie, break down the characters and casting surprises, highlight the film’s legacy and genre-shaping influence, and share the behind-the-scenes stories that made Bruce Willis’s hero an unexpected cultural icon. From Hans Gruber’s unforgettable villainy to the film’s “Die Hard in a ____” effect across decades of action films, it’s a nostalgic and big-hearted look at why this movie endures and why so many of us return to it every holiday season.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

Die Hard: The Great Christmas-Movie Debate- Episode #845

Cathy and Todd discuss the making of Toy Story, the 1995 film that changed animation forever. They explore the film’s massive cultural impact and the introduction of emotionally complex heroes like Woody and Buzz, who grew up alongside their audience. They also look at the creative forces behind the movie, including John Lasseter’s rise and fall and the way Pixar rebuilt its culture in the wake of industry reckonings. They dive into the random facts, hidden jokes, emotional details, and psychological layers that make the movie endlessly rewatchable, from Randy Newman’s music to Sid’s misunderstood chaos.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

Toy Story — The Psychology and Nostalgia That Made It a Classic- Episode #844

We had two special guests on the podcast today – Rosalind Wiseman and our daughter Jacey – you don’t want to miss this discussion about dignity, respect, Euphoria, sex ed, boy group chats and of course, Mean Girls. You can learn more about Rosalind and her work @ https://culturesofdignity.com

Time Stamps

4:20 Painting or remodeling needs? Check out Avid Co.

7:03 Mean Girls & Queen Bees & Wannabees

11:15 Hollywood high school vs real high school

11:50 Euphoria

16:42 Masterminds & Wingmen

20:29 Are girls meaner?

24:21 Boys group chats

32:00 The problem with respect

38:34 Parents gossip

40:36 Sex ed

43:12 Dignity vs respect

55:00 Teasing

57:00 Popularity

1:01:00 Getting your kids to talk to you

Resources

https://culturesofdignity.com

2020 Zen Parenting Conference

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Rosalind Wiseman-Building A Culture of Dignity: Podcast #517

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