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Todd and Cathy Adams

Zen POP Parenting blends Gen X sensibility with mindful living, emotional awareness, and the music, movies, and moments that shaped us. Parenting is the thread that runs through it all—because whether our kids are little or grown, how we connect, communicate, and make sense of ourselves and our history matters. Get access to our premium podcast, Zen Parenting LIVE!, and join other TeamZen members for exclusive episodes and deeper connection-https://zenpopparenting.com/#team-zen

Zen Parenting Radio

Cathy and Todd discuss Trading Places for “Christmas movies that might not be Christmas movies” month. John Landis’ 1983 comedy-satire dropped the same year as Return of the Jedi, Flashdance, WarGames, and Risky Business, yet still became one of the biggest hits of the year. With Dan Aykroyd, a very young Eddie Murphy (only 21!), Jamie Lee Curtis, and a plot that dives deep into class and privilege, they discuss what the movie was saying about wealth, meritocracy, and who gets access, along with the complicated, messy, and very 80s parts that would never make it past a studio today.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

Trading Places Episode# 846

Cathy and Todd discuss Die Hard, the 1988 action classic that redefined the genre, covering everything from its Christmas Eve plot and iconic Nakatomi Plaza setting to the film’s surprisingly heartfelt themes of family, reconciliation, and love. They discuss why so many (including Cathy) consider it a Christmas movie, break down the characters and casting surprises, highlight the film’s legacy and genre-shaping influence, and share the behind-the-scenes stories that made Bruce Willis’s hero an unexpected cultural icon. From Hans Gruber’s unforgettable villainy to the film’s “Die Hard in a ____” effect across decades of action films, it’s a nostalgic and big-hearted look at why this movie endures and why so many of us return to it every holiday season.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

Die Hard: The Great Christmas-Movie Debate- Episode #845

Cathy and Todd discuss the making of Toy Story, the 1995 film that changed animation forever. They explore the film’s massive cultural impact and the introduction of emotionally complex heroes like Woody and Buzz, who grew up alongside their audience. They also look at the creative forces behind the movie, including John Lasseter’s rise and fall and the way Pixar rebuilt its culture in the wake of industry reckonings. They dive into the random facts, hidden jokes, emotional details, and psychological layers that make the movie endlessly rewatchable, from Randy Newman’s music to Sid’s misunderstood chaos.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

Toy Story — The Psychology and Nostalgia That Made It a Classic- Episode #844

Cathy and Todd discuss Forrest Gump, a movie they’ve loved for years, one they even saw together when it first came out. They explore how this emotional epic serves as both parable and modern American myth, following Forrest’s innocence through some of the country’s most turbulent moments while Jenny’s life reflects a very different America marked by trauma, rebellion, and survival. They dig into the ongoing debate over whether Forrest Gump deserved to win Best Picture over Pulp Fiction and The Shawshank Redemption, and laugh about how many lines from the movie have become part of their everyday conversations. This is the third film in our Tom Hanks month – we’ve already covered Big and Cast Away, and next week we’ll wrap up with Toy Story.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

Forrest Gump: A Paradoxical Parable- Episode #843

Cathy and Todd continue Tom Hanks Month with Cast Away, the 2000 classic that came out just as the world was speeding up with email, cell phones, and the dot-com boom. They talk about how this quiet, lonely movie made such an impact and why it hit so differently in an era obsessed with productivity and control. They go through their categories and favorite scenes to share what makes the movie so memorable, and then “roll in the deep” about what makes it so meaningful – from Chuck’s relationship with Wilson to his final crossroads, and what the story says about time, survival, and what it means to really be alive.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

Cast Away: A Movie About Time, Control, and Surrender- Episode #842

To kick off Tom Hanks month, Cathy and Todd revisit Big, the 1988 classic that made him a star and reminded us what it means to grow up too fast. The movie blends humor, heart, and magic (and a somewhat inappropriate romance), letting us laugh at the absurdity of adult life while remembering what it felt like to be young. They talk about why Big still matters, why friendship is at the core of the story, and how Penny Marshall’s direction brought depth to a wild premise. They also discuss what the story reveals about growing up, parenting, and the pressure to “perform” adulthood.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

BIG and the Wisdom of Staying Young & Playful- Episode #840

Cathy and Todd discuss Se7en, David Fincher’s dark and unforgettable thriller. They talk about how the movie came together from the casting of Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman to the decision to keep Kevin Spacey’s role a secret, and how Fincher’s style changed what crime movies could be. They also dig into the story’s moral questions, the infamous ending, and why Se7en still hits just as hard today as it did in 1995. They also talk about how the film shaped Fincher’s career and how the seven deadly sins still show up in our culture.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

Se7en: The Movie That Made Us Ask What’s in the Box- Episode #839

Cathy and Todd discuss The Haunting of Hill House and how Mike Flanagan turned a classic ghost story into an emotional story of family trauma, grief, and repair. From the houses we grew up in to the ghosts we still carry, they talk about the energy that lingers and the monsters we end up sympathizing with. They discuss why Hill House hit Gen X so deeply, how it flipped horror into therapy, made the supernatural feel like emotional realism, and showed that the scariest hauntings are simply the things our families were never willing to talk about. It’s a conversation about home, loss, and what happens when we finally stop running from our ghosts and choose to accept, forgive, and integrate our past.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

The Haunting of Hill House: A Gen X Ghost Story About Grief & Family Secrets- Episode #838

Released in 2008, Twilight dropped into a perfect cultural storm with Obama’s election, iPhones taking off, emo Tumblr in full swing, and the YA craze exploding after Harry Potter. Catherine Hardwicke’s film felt raw and indie with blue-grey filters, handheld cameras, and the emotional awkwardness of being seventeen. It wasn’t polished Hollywood fantasy; it was sincere and strange, which made it real to the girls and women who saw themselves in Bella’s clumsy intensity. The story of a human girl who falls for a vampire who might kill her, mixed romance, danger, and repression in a way that was both thrilling and uncomfortable. It gave us Edward’s brooding abstinence, Jacob’s rivalry, baseball in a thunderstorm, and that unforgettable line: “Hold on tight, spider monkey.” It was about longing, isolation, and the fantasy of being truly seen, a theme that shaped a generation’s idea of love.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

Twilight, Vampires, and Werewolves- Episode #837

When Scream hit theaters in 1996, horror was stuck in a loop of sequels and fading scares. What made Scream different was its sharp, self-aware, and deeply Gen X voice. It mocked the rules of slashers while playing by them, spoke the language of VHS rentals and MTV, and turned Ghostface into an instant icon. In this episode, we look at how Scream captured a generation’s worldview, why Millennials later made it their own, and how it reshaped horror for everything that came after.

Some Ways to Support Us

 1. 

Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Order Restoring our Girls
Join Team Zen
 2. 

Links shared in this episode:

For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

This week’s sponsor(s):

Avid Co • DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.

David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780
MenLiving • – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements

Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys

Other Ways to Support Us

 • Follow us on social media 

Instagram
YouTube
Facebook
 • 

 • Buy and leave a review for 
Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World
 • Find everything ZPR on our 
Resources Page
 • Guys- Complete a 
MenLiving Connect profile

Summary

When Scream hit theaters in 1996, horror was stuck in a loop of sequels and fading scares. What made Scream different was its sharp, self-aware, and deeply Gen X voice. It mocked the rules of slashers while playing by them, spoke the language of VHS rentals and MTV, and turned Ghostface into an instant icon. In this episode, we look at how Scream captured a generation’s worldview, why Millennials later made it their own, and how it reshaped horror for everything that came after.

Horror Movies and Parenting Insights

Stuey and Kathy introduce their podcast episode, “Zen Pop Parenting,” which focuses on a deeper analysis of horror movies, including Scream, as part of their “Spooky Season” series. They discuss the movie’s themes of depth, humor, and meta-commentary on horror genres, and plan to cover Twilight and The Haunting of Hill House in upcoming episodes. Stuey mentions Kathy’s book, “Restoring Our Girls,” as a potential Halloween gift. The episode aims to explore personal connections to horror while providing entertainment and reflection.

Scream: A Gen X Horror Classic

Stuey discussed the 1996 film Scream, explaining its plot, characters, and cultural significance. He noted that the movie was a Gen X film, featuring actors of their age group, and served as a reboot of the horror genre. Stuey also compared Scream to Halloween, highlighting how the two films represented different eras of movie-watching experiences for different generations.

Movie Budget and Horror Preferences

Stuey discussed the success of a movie with a $15 million budget that grossed over $170 million worldwide. He shared his personal preferences for horror movies, explaining that he can watch them but is often distracted by the presence of a boom mic holder, unlike his partner who covers her eyes. Stuey also mentioned his experience watching the Scream series, noting that he prefers anticipation over graphic violence. He played a game of “two truths and a lie” related to the Scream franchise, and they discussed how phone etiquette has changed over time.

Scream’s Influence on Horror Films

Stuey discussed the creation and references of the horror film Scream, including its writer Kevin Williamson’s inspiration from a documentary about Danny Rowling and the use of the Ghostface mask. He highlighted the film’s influence on caller ID usage and its references to other horror movies like Halloween, Friday the 13th, and A Nightmare on Elm Street. Stuey also mentioned that Neve Campbell was nearly typecast in horror films due to her role in Scream and The Craft.

Scream Movie Trivia Discussion

Stuey shared interesting trivia about the “Scream” movie, including how Matthew Lillard wasn’t supposed to audition but landed the role of Stu, and how Courtney Cox met her husband David Arquette on set. They discussed the movie’s plot, including the motive for the killings and Stu’s unique character. Stuey also pointed out some inconsistencies in the movie, such as the ease with which the killer moves the victim and the trope of a boyfriend sneaking into his girlfriend’s bedroom, which is common in 80s movies.

Garage Door Safety in Movies

Stuey discussed the unrealistic portrayal of garage door safety in a movie scene and criticized the 1980s-style depiction of teenagers being killed by TVs. He also analyzed the rules for surviving horror movies, as outlined by the character Randy in the film Scream, which include avoiding sex, drugs, and making promises to return.

Horror Movie Rules and Tropes

Stuey discussed various horror movie tropes and rules, including not going outside for strange noises, not splitting up, and not asking who’s there. He also highlighted specific examples from the movie “Scream,” such as Sydney following her own advice by going out the front door. Stuey introduced a new category called “Hidden Gems,” which includes actors’ cameos and small details that viewers might not notice on first viewing. He mentioned Linda Blair’s brief appearance in the film and the interesting fact that the high school scenes were initially meant to be shot at Santa Rosa High School but had to be moved due to the school board’s concerns about the film’s violent content.

Scream’s Humorous and Unengaging Elements

Stuey discussed the comedic elements in the movie “Scream,” particularly focusing on the unintentional tripping of the Ghostface character, which added a humorous touch to the film. He also expressed his lack of interest in the “Hall Pass” section, specifically the character Dewey, played by David Arquette, whom he found unengaging and unnecessary to the plot. Stuey compared Dewey’s character to a less successful “Friends” episode, highlighting the lack of humor and coherence in the storyline.

Rolling in the Deep Analysis

Stuey discussed the film “Rolling in the Deep,” focusing on Sydney’s unresolved trauma from her mother’s murder and Billy’s inappropriate response to her grief. He criticized the film’s portrayal of Sydney as a tease and its misogynistic undertones. Stuey also explored themes of grief and betrayal in the movie, noting how horror films often use these emotions to create fear. He emphasized that betrayal, like grief, is a significant fear for humans due to the sense of isolation it brings.

Self-Awareness in Meta Movies

Stuey discussed the concept of meta movies, explaining that they are self-aware and comment on themselves and their genre. He used the example of “Scream” to illustrate this, noting its references to other horror movies and its self-referential nature. Stuey also mentioned that they and Todd had decided not to include “Children of the Corn” in their spooky season lineup due to its poor quality.

Horror Meta and Cultural Impact

Stuey discussed the meta aspects of horror movies, particularly Scream, and how they subvert audience expectations while still engaging with genre conventions. He noted that horror films are relatively low-risk investments for studios due to their consistent profitability, whether successful or not. Stuey also highlighted the film’s cultural impact, including its influence on subsequent meta-horror works like Scary Movie and Cabin in the Woods. The discussion concluded with a music game, where Stuey chose Nirvana’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit” to relate to the film’s self-aware critique of genre tropes, and he announced that the next meeting would focus on Twilight.

Scream: The Gen X Horror Movie About Gen X Horror Movies- Episode #836

Fear is normal. It’s normal for children to be afraid. Instead of telling them to not be afraid, let’s help them find tools to deal with their fear. Speaking of fear, Todd scared his daughter when he dressed up as Cookie Monster….his intentions were good, but it didn’t quite work out the way he planned……

Here’s the link to Cathy’s blog that we mention on the show – http://www.chicagoparent.com/community/the-self-aware-parent/2011/march/let%27s-be-clear—what-do-we-really-want-for-our-children

It Turns Out…Furry Blue Monster is Scary To 2 Year Olds

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