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Headgum & Nicole Byer

Love and dating can be messy—so let’s talk about it! On this multi-award-winning podcast, comedian Nicole Byer explores romantic highs, lows, and all the juicy stuff in between, alongside comedians, experts, and sometimes an ex or two. New episodes every Friday!

Why Won't You Date Me? with Nicole Byer

Tracie Thoms (RENT, The Devil Wears Prada 2) joins Nicole to discuss her 8-year journey to join the iconic cast of RENT, the wild logic men use to avoid commitment, and why some of them want all the benefits of a girlfriend with zero of the responsibility. Tracie also breaks down the nightmare of having dated someone who tried dictate her career, and reveals why living apart from her partner has actually been the ultimate relationship hack. Plus, why does true love make you feel sleepy? And Nicole opens up about her PMDD diagnosis.

I'm just such a big fan of RENT and so happy we have Joanne on, omg folks this is a big one for me personally. Rentheads unite!

Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

Take our listener survey and shape the future of the podcast!

Support this podcast by checking out our sponsor:

• Squarespace: Head to squarespace.com/DATEME to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code DATEME.

Follow:

All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudateme

Tour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastaken

YouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

TikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod 

Instagram: @nicolebyer

X: @nicolebyer

This is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Measuring Love & Male Delusion (w/ Tracie Thoms)

World famous relationship therapist Esther Perel has been studying relationships for over 40 years. She joins Nicole to share the most common problems couples seek therapy for, the 3 types of conflicts we fight over, and how to productively resolve them. Esther discusses how to get over "icks" while dating, and challenges us to ask ourselves: what "icks" would people find in you? They also explore exactly why modern dating feels so incredibly tough right now, the fact that therapy speak has gone mainstream thanks to shows like The Sopranos, and whether that's a good or bad thing. Plus, Esther shares a wild story about her first therapy session between a man and his AI girlfriend, and she totally flips the script on Nicole to ask the ultimate question: Would you date you?

Celebrate the 20th anniversary of her groundbreaking book, Mating in Captivity.

Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

Take our listener survey and shape the future of the podcast!

Support this podcast by checking out our sponsor:

• Chime: Chime is not just smarter banking, it is the most rewarding way to bank. Join the millions who are already banking fee free today. Head to Chime.com/DATEME.

Follow:

All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudateme

Tour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastaken

YouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

TikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod 

Instagram: @nicolebyer

X: @nicolebyer

This is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Would You Date YOU? (w/ Relationship Therapist Esther Perel)

Author Rachel Reid (Heated Rivalry) joins Nicole to chat about the wild, viral success of her steamy queer romance novels and the hit TV adaptation. She shares how she met her husband while performing a smelly, hockey-themed burlesque act, and the dynamic that keeps their 20-year one sided open marriage working for them. She discusses the creative process behind writing explicit romance between men, and exactly why she absolutely does not want to hear your glowing reviews of her work. Plus, Rachel opens up about navigating her recent Parkinson's diagnosis.

Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

Take our listener survey and shape the future of the podcast!

Support this podcast by checking out our sponsors:

• FirstLeaf: Get personalized wines, delivered. Head to TryFirstleaf.com/DATEME to sign up and you'll get 50% off your first box PLUS free shipping for an entire year

• Wayfair: Get prepped for patio season for way less. Head to Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home. Wayfair. Every style. Every home.

Follow:

All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudateme

Tour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastaken

YouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

TikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod 

Instagram: @nicolebyer

X: @nicolebyer

This is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Writing Heated Rivalry (w/ Rachel Reid)

Comedian and actor Beck Bennett (SNL, What's Our Podcast?) joins Nicole to talk about meeting his wife on a sketch shoot and how his wallet-less first date turned into a romantic, fart-filled sleepover. Beck opens up about surviving long-distance dating while shooting SNL, why he believes "love is trust," and the Joshua Tree engagement trip that ended with them sleeping in separate twin beds. He shares the creative ways he jerked off as a kid (including using a Sock'em Bopper and a vibrating pen), and Nicole admits to stealing her first vibrator from Spencer’s Gifts.

Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

Take our listener survey and shape the future of the podcast!

Support this podcast and get discounts by checking out our sponsors:

• Jones Road Beauty: Use code DATEME at jonesroadbeauty.com to get a Free Gift with your first purchase! #JonesRoadBeauty #ad 

• Warby Parker: My listeners can buy one prescription pair and get 20% off additional pairs at WarbyParker.com/DATEME — and using our link helps support the show. #WarbyParker #ad

• Squarespace: Head to squarespace.com/DATEME to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code DATEME.

Follow:

All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudateme

Tour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastaken

YouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

TikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod 

Instagram: @nicolebyer

X: @nicolebyer

This is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Farting All Night on a First Date (w/ Beck Bennett)

Voice actress Sarah Natochenny (Pokémon) joins Nicole for a chat about how voicing Ash Ketchum inspired her to become the adventurous protagonist of her own life. Sarah shares her method for vetting a first date, why she has absolutely zero tolerance for men who neg her, and why animal companions (like her cat, Pikachu) will always be better than a boyfriend. Plus, the gals discuss Cher's wild 40-year age gap relationship, share tips for traveling solo as a single woman, and Nicole recounts a horrifying road rage incident that still haunts her.

Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

Take our listener survey and shape the future of the podcast!

Support this podcast and get discounts by checking out our sponsors:

• Jones Road Beauty: Use code DATEME at jonesroadbeauty.com to get a Free Gift with your first purchase! #JonesRoadBeauty #ad 

• Cash App: Download Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/3v6r90n6 #CashAppPod. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. See terms and conditions at https://cash.app/legal/us/en-us/card-agreement. Discounts and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit http://cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.

• BetterHelp: This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/dateme today to get 10% off your first month.

• Quince: Head to quince.com/dateme for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. 

Follow:

All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudateme

Tour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastaken

YouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

TikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod 

Instagram: @nicolebyer

X: @nicolebyer

This is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Pikachu, I Choose You! (w/ Sarah Natochenny)

Fashion icon Tan France (Queer Eye, Honorable Gays) joins Nicole for a chat about how a planned "slut tour" accidentally resulted in an 18-year marriage, his secret past designing clothes for Mormon women, and why he really, really didn't want to be on Queer Eye. Tan gets real about the intense racism he faced dating in the UK - including the multiple times guys forced him to keep their dates a secret. Plus, he shares a horrifying first date story that had him walking out of dinner early, and they rip apart the bizarre new "looksmaxxing" trend.

Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

Take our listener survey and shape the future of the podcast!

Support this podcast and get discounts by checking out our sponsors:

Jones Road: Use code DATEME at jonesroadbeauty.com to get a Free Shimmer Face Oil with your first purchase! #JonesRoadBeauty #ad

Chime: Chime is not just smarter banking, it is the most rewarding way to bank. Join the millions who are already banking fee free today. Head to Chime.com/DATEME.

Squarespace: Head to squarespace.com/DATEME to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code DATEME.

Wayfair: Way Day is THE sale to shop the best deals in home – we’re talking up to 80% OFF with fast and FREE shipping on everything! Head to Wayfair.com April 25th through the 27th to shop Way Day.

Follow:

All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudateme

Tour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastaken

YouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

TikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod 

Instagram: @nicolebyer

X: @nicolebyer

This is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Looksmaxxing Is Psychotic (w/ Tan France)

Artist and actress Makhyli (Boys World) joins Nicole to chat about her experience dating while in a pop girl group. Makhyli shares how she literally created a "Build-A-Boy" slideshow presentation to manifest her current boyfriend - and it actually worked! The girls swap their worst car-date horror stories, from a guy so cheap he forced Makhyli to share a single McDonald's french fry, to a man who casually had rotting food in his backseat. Makhyli opens up about navigating relationship paranoia with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), and the two discuss tips they've picked up for dating with ADHD. Plus they chat about their love for the latest season of Love on the Spectrum.

Makhyli's new single, I Need You (Cat and Mouse) is out now!

Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

Take our listener survey and shape the future of the podcast!

Support this podcast and get discounts by checking out our sponsors:

Jones Road: Use code DATEME at jonesroadbeauty.com to get a Free Shimmer Face Oil with your first purchase! #JonesRoadBeauty #ad

Warby Parker: Our listeners can buy one prescription pair and get 20% off additional pairs at WarbyParker.com/DATEME — and using our link helps support the show.

Lola Blankets: Get 40% off your entire order at Lolablankets.com by using code DATEME at checkout. Experience the world’s #1 blanket with Lola Blankets.

Follow:

All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudateme

Tour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastaken

YouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

TikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod 

Instagram: @nicolebyer

X: @nicolebyer

This is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Dating with Borderline Personality Disorder (w/ Makhyli)

Actor Nathan Mitchell (The Boys, Ginny & Georgia) joins Nicole to discuss being in relationship limbo, and why it’s actually great to be on the same page about not being on the same page. He shares the boat date gone horribly wrong when his date air-humped a stranger, a make-out session that left him bloody, and he addresses the theories that his Ginny & Georgia character is AI. Nicole shares her experience with a man who thought a picture of a sandwich was an appropriate thirst trap. Plus, Nathan explains the importance of astrology in dating and gives Nicole a deep-dive birth chart reading that uncovers her karmic weight.

Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

Take our listener survey and shape the future of the podcast!

Support this podcast and get discounts by checking out our sponsors:

Jones Road: Use code DATEME at jonesroadbeauty.com to get a Free Shimmer Face Oil with your first purchase! #JonesRoadBeauty #ad

Wayfair: Way Day is THE sale to shop the best deals in home – we’re talking up to 80% OFF with fast and FREE shipping on everything! Head to Wayfair.com April 25th through the 27th to shop Way Day.

Cash App: Download Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/3v6r90n6 #CashAppPod. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. See terms and conditions at https://cash.app/legal/us/en-us/card-agreement. Discounts and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit http://cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.

Follow:

All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudateme

Tour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastaken

YouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

TikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod 

Instagram: @nicolebyer

X: @nicolebyer

This is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Astrology's Effect in Relationships (w/ Nathan Mitchell)

Actor and director Danielle Fishel (Boy Meets World, Girl Meets World) joins Nicole for a chat about how it felt to be treated as a "sex symbol" in the 90s before she was even an adult. Danielle talks about the gross public countdowns to her 18th birthday, and the trauma of being mocked on her own show for being "fat" at a size 4.

She shares what it was like taking Lance Bass to her high school prom during the absolute peak of *NSYNC, having Sabrina Carpenter and John Mayer in her wedding party, and details a 3-day nightmare date from her matchmaker era that might just be the worst dating story we've ever heard on this podcast. Plus, the sweet story of marrying her high school acquaintance after reconnecting on Twitter 18 years later.

Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

Want more Danielle? Check out her many podcasts!

Teen Beat - The show where she interviews other child stars and actors about their upbringings and experiences in the industry.

Pod Meets World - Fishel rewatches Boy Meets World and shares behind-the-scenes stories with her co-stars.

American Idol Official Podcast - Fishel Interviews the eliminated contestants.

Take our listener survey and shape the future of the podcast!

Support this podcast and get discounts by checking out our sponsors:

» HelloFresh: Go to HelloFresh.com/dateme10fm now to Get 10 Free meals + Free Nutribullet® Ultra Plus+ 2-in-1 Compact Kitchen System (a $189.99 value) on your 3rd box. *Free meals applied as a discount on the first box, new subscribers only, varies by plan. Disclaimer: Must order the 3rd box by May 31st, 2026.

» IQBar: Text DATE to 64000 to get 20% off all IQBAR products, plus FREE shipping. Message and data rates may apply.

» The Man of Many Fathers: Available everywhere audiobooks are sold.

» Squarespace: Head to squarespace.com/DATEME to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code DATEME.

» Betterhelp: This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/dateme today to get 10% off your first month.

Follow:

All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudateme

Tour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastaken

YouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

TikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod 

Instagram: @nicolebyer

X: @nicolebyer

This is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Life as a 90s Sex Symbol (w/ Danielle Fishel)

Comedian Drew Droege (Search Party, Bob's Burgers) joins Nicole for a chat about why you should never blow out your own candle in a relationship, the creepy phenomenon of couples who look like twins, and how pop culture's been romanticized abusive relationships. Drew introduces Nicole to a new hookup app that is basically Yelp for blowjobs, and reads some of the incredible BJ reviews that are written like romance novels. Plus, they break down the new Alexander Skarsgård dom/sub rom-com movie, Pillion.

Los Angeles! See Drew Droege's show, Theatre Idiot at Dynasty Typewriter on April 1st. Get tickets at dynastytypewriter.com/calendar-squad-up?event-id=131942

Take our listener survey and shape the future of the podcast!

Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

Support this podcast and get discounts by checking out our sponsors:

» Jones Road Beauty: Use code DATEME at jonesroadbeauty.com to get a Free Shimmer Face Oil with your first purchase! #JonesRoadBeauty #ad 

» Equip: Learn more about Equip’s virtual eating disorder treatment at equip.health/dateme

» Planned Parenthood: Donate to support Planned Parenthood now at plannedparenthood.org/defend.

» NOCD: If you're struggling with OCD or unrelenting intrusive thoughts, NOCD can help. Book a free 15 minute call to get started: learn.nocd.com/DATEME

» Cash App: Download Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/3v6r90n6 #CashAppPod. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. See terms and conditions at https://cash.app/legal/us/en-us/card-agreement. Discounts and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit http://cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.

Follow:

All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudateme

Tour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastaken

YouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcast

TikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod 

Instagram: @nicolebyer

X: @nicolebyer

This is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Measuring Love & Male Delusion (w/ Tracie Thoms)

Lyt når som helst, hvor som helst

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