Father (Episode #109)

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Welcome to a new episode of The Way Out Is In: The Zen Art of Living, a podcast series mirroring Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh’s deep teachings of Buddhist philosophy: a simple yet profound methodology for dealing with our suffering, and for creating more happiness and joy in our lives.

In this episode, Zen Buddhist monk Brother Phap Huu and leadership coach Jo Confino reflect on the passing of Brother Phap Huu’s father and the power of community in difficult moments, as well as considering insights into the teachings of no birth, no death.

This emotional conversation touches tender places and explores the Brother’s personal journey of grief and loss, from first hearing the news of his father’s stroke, to the funeral and the subsequent processing. Brother Phap Huu further explores his complicated relationship with his father, the sacrifices made by his parents, and his regret at not being able to fully express his gratitude and love.

Indeed, “It’s one thing to teach about ‘no birth, no death’, the passing of a loved one, but it’s a very different thing to experience it.”

The episode ends with a short meditation guided by Brother Phap Huu.

Co-produced by the Plum Village App: https://plumvillage.app/

And Global Optimism: https://globaloptimism.com/

With support from the Thich Nhat Hanh Foundation: https://thichnhathanhfoundation.org/

List of resources

Bodh Gaya https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bodh_Gaya

Bodhi tree https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bodhi_tree

Christiana Figueres https://www.globaloptimism.com/christiana-figueres

‘The Fourteen Mindfulness Trainings’ https://plumvillage.org/mindfulness/the-14-mindfulness-trainings

Interbeing https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Interbeing

Jeta Grove https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jetavana

Joan Halifax https://www.joanhalifax.org/

‘Listening to Namo Avalokiteshvara’ https://plumvillage.app/listening-to-namo-avalokiteshvara/

Plum Village Tradition https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plum_Village_Tradition

Sister Chan Khong https://plumvillage.org/about/sister-chan-khong

Upaya Zen Center https://www.joanhalifax.org/upaya

The Way Out Is In: ‘Slow Down, Rest, and Heal: The Spirit of the Rains Retreat (Episode #7)’ https://plumvillage.org/podcast/slow-down-rest-and-heal-the-spirit-of-the-rains-retreat

The Way Out Is In: ‘The Three Jewels (Episode #89)’ https://plumvillage.org/podcast/the-three-jewels-episode-89

Quotes

“Be kind in life because that kindness is something that you can never underestimate. It will come back. Just trust that.”

“For a lot of us immigrants in Canada, the temple was not just a spiritual and religious refuge, it was a cultural refuge. It was where we would see each other as Vietnamese. It was where we would smell the incense, eat the Vietnamese food, and hear the language… The temple was where we touched our little Vietnam and where everyone could feel that their longing was being answered by this community coming together.”

“The good training of Plum Village is to learn to see the flowers first.”

“It is never too late to say what needs to be said, even if someone has passed.”

“‘Enjoy and easy.’ Enjoy that no matter how hard life is, we can always taste joy. And no matter how hectic life is, learn to be at ease; be easy with yourself.”

“The practice of no birth, no death is also to see that life is also right here, right now.”

“For me, the practice of no birth and no death gives us permission to hold both and to not be tied down by only sorrow.”

“We’re here to connect the ultimate and the historical – not to see them as separate, but to bring them closer together.”