Why Your Partner's Sexual Past Is Haunting Your Present

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Episode Description

In this Sex with Emily hotline episode, Dr. Emily answers honest questions about sex, relationships, and pleasure. Ben struggles with intrusive thoughts about his girlfriend's sexual past—how do generational differences in sexual norms play a role, and what can he do when his mind won't stop wandering?

A caller whose day-long fantasies about his wife cause premature ejaculation wonders if this is actually a problem. Emily explores when mental foreplay becomes too much of a good thing and how to approach these conversations with your partner.

For finding thirds for threesomes, what's the safest way to meet like-minded people? Emily discusses the essential conversations couples need to have before inviting someone into their bedroom.

Nathan worries his girlfriend only orgasms with toys despite her past relationships not requiring them. Is this about his performance, her anatomy, or something deeper about emotional connection and letting go?

Finally, how do you rebuild your relationship with your own sexuality after a major life change? Emily helps a caller navigate solo pleasure during divorce when motivation is low and old fantasies no longer serve.

Throughout, Emily reinforces that sexual satisfaction looks different for everyone.

Timestamps:

0:00 - Introduction

1:29 - Dealing with Partner's Sexual Past

5:42 - How to Replace Negative Thoughts with Positive Relationship Focus

11:45 - Premature Ejaculation from All-Day Mental Arousal

17:07 - Starting Sexting in Long-Term Relationships

20:04 - Finding a Third for Threesomes

29:52 - The Field Effect

34:13 - When Emotional Connection Changes Physical Response

40:13 - Prioritizing Solo Pleasure During Divorce and Life Transitions

46:44 - Closing Thoughts and Resources