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JLML Press

In the 25+ years Janet Lansbury has worked with children and parents, she's learned a lot. She's here to share it with you. Each episode of Unruffled addresses a reader's parenting issue through the lens of Janet's respectful parenting approach, consistently offering a perspective shift that ultimately frees parents of the need for scripts, strategies, tricks, and tactics.

Janet is a parenting author and consultant whose website (JanetLansbury.com) is visited by millions of readers annually. Her work informs, inspires, and supports caregivers of infants and toddlers across the globe, helping to create authentic relationships of respect, trust, and love.

Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at NoBadKidsCourse and JanetLansbury. Her best-selling books “No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline without Shame” and "Elevating Child Care: A Guide to Respectful Parenting" are available in all formats at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or wherever you buy your books.

Featured in The New Yorker, recommended 'Best Parenting Podcast' by The Washington Post, The New York Times, USA Today, The Cut, Fatherly, Today's Parent, and many, many more.

Please note: This podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only. The views and advice presented on this podcast by Janet Lansbury and her guests are based on their training and experience. Opinions are offered in good faith but do not constitute professional, psychiatric, or medical advice, neither are they intended to be. You do not have to use this information, and it should not be substituted for qualified medical expertise.

Copyright JLML Press (2026) All Rights Reserved

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled

Toddler twins are suddenly melting down at bedtime. A 5-year-old is struggling to manage his unruly friend. Janet explains how parents in both these cases can help to resolve these issues by better understanding their children's sensitivity to change. 

Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

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Lost in Transition - How Changes Affect Our Kids' Behavior

Janet believes that one of the biggest hurdles for us as parents is our own self-doubt and hopes that 2026 will be the year we stop second-guessing ourselves. With this in mind, she offers suggestions to 3 families who've written to her about their current struggles. The first is a mom whose 2.75-year-old seems to be stalling during transitions and melting down when the mom doesn't comply with her demands. This parent says, "... my biggest struggle and question is how do we trust our kids' feelings and be there for them when we feel the pressure to keep our schedule on track and move forward?" A second parent is caring for three young children and worries she's not giving them enough play time with her. "I struggle to be playful and silly with my kids because I'm constantly navigating the mental load of being a mom of multiple children." Finally, a parent who just gave birth to her second child is feeling lost as to how to handle her 4-year-old's rudeness towards friends and family members. "This is the button she instinctively knows to push that will leave me ruffled and floundering as a parent because I greatly value manners, gratitude and politeness." Janet offers each of these families what she hopes is encouraging and helpful feedback. 

Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

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The Year to Stop Doubting Yourself

A parent struggles to control emotions like anger, frustration, and disappointment when they’re triggered by her toddler. While she strives to be a confident leader by appearing calm and unruffled, she also wants to model her emotions authentically for her child. In this encore episode, Janet clarifies what it really means to be "unruffled" and how parents can approach this goal without faking or stuffing their emotions.

Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

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Can We Be Sad or Angry And Still Be Unruffled?

A parent wants to get out of a cycle of bribing her 3.5-year old and writes to Janet for help. “It seems that in order to get him to do anything, I have to offer a reward, treat, or special outing.” If these strategies don’t work, she says, she will threaten to take something away. This mom admits that she is a people pleaser, so when she does set a boundary, she feels guilty about it. She worries that she’s teaching this to her son. “I don’t want him to feel guilty about his feelings or his boundaries.”

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Threats and Bribes Aren't Very Helpful (What to Do Instead)

Every child is certainly unique, but when it comes to their behavior, we can sometimes complicate a situation that might really be quite simple to address. This week Janet shares an email from a parent who says her nearly 4-year-old has lately been argumentative and having meltdowns over the smallest things. "She seems to want to self-sabotage and create problems where there are none." This parent has tried to be consistent in her responses but to no avail. "Is it a cry for attention?" she wonders. "Either way we're not making any progress or seeing the light at the end of the tunnel." A second note comes from the mother of a 4.5-year old looking for book recommendations "for guidance on how to help her follow our instructions more readily." Janet recommends a single solution for both these parents. 

Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠⁠⁠⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠⁠⁠⁠.

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Finally! A One-Size-Fits-All Approach to Our Kids' Behavior

As parents, we do our best to raise kind, thoughtful, appreciative kids. But despite our efforts, our children can sometimes seem downright ungrateful. In this episode, a mom writes to Janet about her frustrations with her sons, aged six and four. Rather than appreciate the gifts and special outings she treats them to, they inevitably ask for more, more, more and then complain when she won't give it to them. "It feels like nonstop unhappiness when I'm trying so hard to make them happy." This mom wonders if perhaps it's expecting too much of her kids to feel grateful when they are legitimately disappointed, but she wants them to learn to focus on the positive. Janet offers her perspective on what causes children to behave this way and offers three suggestions that can help our kids to appreciate the efforts we make for them. 

Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠⁠⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠⁠⁠.

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3 Secrets to Raising Grateful Kids

Janet responds to emails from parents who describe struggling with their children’s strong emotions. One writes that her 2-year-old rejects her comfort when he has a meltdown. “It breaks my heart, and I feel like I must be doing something wrong.” Another writes that her 7-year-old says he doesn’t feel love from his mother. Another email describes how a 3-year-old’s tantrums last all afternoon and into the evening, disrupting the rest of the family’s routine, and they “all feel trapped by a 3-year-old.” And a therapist observes that her child holds in emotions in front of family and peers. In this encore episode, Janet identifies the common thread in all these situations and offers a hopeful answer to weather the storms.

Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠⁠.

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The Best Response to Our Children's Turbulent Emotions

We all aspire for our children to grow up with a positive self-image and an abundance of self-confidence. When life throws our child a dilemma, it’s our natural instinct to want to fix it, or at least work them through the uncomfortable feelings with a pep talk. In this encore episode, Janet answers questions from three listeners and offers a more helpful – albeit counterintuitive – perspective that can help children learn resilience and find the kind of confidence in themselves that lasts a lifetime.

Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠ and ⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠.

Her best-selling books ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline without Shame”⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠"Elevating Child Care: A Guide to Respectful Parenting"⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ are available wherever books are sold. 

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How to Boost Your Child's Self-Confidence

A parent describes her 5.5-year old as the love of her life. Lately, though, her daughter has been dissolving into silly, immature behavior at inappropriate moments, melting down over nonsensical things, and demanding her mother's attention. "It goes on and on, and I get tired and annoyed." On the other hand, this parent says she feels guilty for not playing along with her daughter's spontaneous games (like joining her in a crab-walking race down the stairs). She worries that at 5.5 years old, her daughter should be moving beyond this type of behavior. "Will she ever stop testing me, or is she just going to keep on seeing how much I can withstand?" Janet has some ideas.

Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Her best-selling books ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline without Shame”⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠"Elevating Child Care: A Guide to Respectful Parenting"⁠⁠⁠⁠ are available wherever books are sold. 

Please Support Our Sponsors.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Don't Play Along With Annoying Behavior

In this episode: Janet receives a follow-up message from the mom she helped last week in the episode "Demanding, Stressed, and Aggressive—What's Happened to My Gentle Child?" The parent candidly shares aspects of Janet's advice that did and didn't work. She then reveals a transformative discovery: "We were getting boundaries and discipline all wrong. We were not being confident leaders or using honest consequences." This mom shares how the situation finally clicked for her and she was able to achieve positive results just three days later. "... The change is already incredible. I can see our four-year-old's real smile, silly loving nature, happiness for the day in the morning, and so much less aggression."

Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Her best-selling books ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline without Shame”⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠"Elevating Child Care: A Guide to Respectful Parenting"⁠⁠⁠ are available wherever books are sold. 

Please Support Our Sponsors.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The Kindness of Consequences

In response to Janet's article “When Your Child Seems Stuck Seeking Negative Attention,” a parent says her daughter will whine and cry while making "reasonable" requests for snuggles and food and play, but when she obliges, her daughter often then refuses those things. If she says no to her daughter’s requests, “it escalates into crying hard and being truly upset.” These reactions lead the parent to suspect that her daughter may actually want to hear ‘no’ so she can have an emotional release. She's confused as to how much attention her daughter really needs versus when to set a boundary.
Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at NoBadKidsCourse.com and JanetLansbury.com.
For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barnes & Noble, and Apple Books. 
Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (www.SessionsAudio.com).
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

 
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How Do We Know When to Set a Boundary?

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