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Voxtopica

No Crying In Baseball

Interpret it as you like, either the unusual more than a year since the last major league no-hitter, or the disappointing and angry-making corporate culture associated with the Detroit Tigers. We kick off the police blotter by sharing the outcome of the Athletic’s investigation resulting in eight men, including six from Ilitch Sports and Entertainment, which operates the team, the former assistant manager, and a former player/current broadcaster for the team, of an appalling range of misconduct toward women staff. We move on to the behavior of the NYY in light of the killing of Charlie Kirk, someone completely unrelated to the Yankees organization, yet honored with a moment of silence – a gesture not extended to victims of school shootings or the killing of elected officials. It's a choice. In boyfriend news, Patrick Bailey has a grand slam walk off adding to Tanner Tightpant’s very bad week. Walker Buehler started off his PHI tenure with a win. Sal Frelick contributes to MIL being the first team to clinch, and Anthony RIzzo commits an error on the first play coming his way in retirement, but makes up for it in a round of beers for his fellow fans. We ponder the range of options of sea witches / mermaids / selkies / sirens available through Etsy vs Craig’s List but the witch that was booked set SEA on a winning streak. Met’s owner Stephen Cohen invests in the renovation of Beyer Stadium, home of the Rockford Peaches. Robinson Canó reaches 4000 professional hits, probably. And there is still hope for Tequila.

We say, “That’s the person who would wear a dickie,” “It’s more you than it is hair,” and “I’m missing 19 hits.” Fight the man, send your game balls to Meredith, get boosted, and find us on Bluesky @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. We now have episode transcripts available! They are available for free at our Patreon site. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

No Means No-No

Patti and Pottymouth will never forget “the screamable baseball game,” which you may know alternatively as the 30th anniversary of Cal Ripken, Jr. breaking Lou Gehrig’s record for consecutive games, Yamamoto’s nearly no-no, or the craziest comeback in the history of the Orioles. We celebrated the importance of showing up every day no matter the challenges. We celebrated a friend to labor, a dad who started the biggest day of his professional life by taking his daughter to her first day of school, and the ballplayer who understood that connecting with fans may be the most important part of the job. We also chanted “Eddie! Eddie!” with cans of Steady Eddie in our hands. We then watched Yoshinobou Yamamoto pitch the game of his life, and that legacy kid Jackson Holliday break it up with a big swing and a smile.

Other baseball things happened too – we ponder what life is like this week for the Phillies fan who berated another Phillies fan at loanDepot Park until he gave up the Harrison Bader home run ball he had retrieved and given to his birthday boy son. DBacks pitching comes back for Pottymouth but is it too little, too late? And the Butler did it. As we do like to lean into a theme, the Serie del Tequila played right into our shot glass clutching hands. Charros del Jalisco may find a home in our NCiB hearts as we learn that both tequila and mariachi come from Jalisco.

We say, “my boyfriend is not the perpetrator," “I was yelling, it’s not a symptom,” and “Ergo, Tequila.” Fight the man, send your game balls to Meredith, get boosted, and find us on Bluesky @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. We now have episode transcripts available! They are available for free at our Patreon site. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

Not Quite Guadalajara

What happens in Vegas definitely gets shared on the pod. Pottymouth reports back on the “moving dirt around” stage of the new ballpark in Las Vegas and ponders the slot machine per capita question. Kyle is nipping at Cal’s heels – is there an actual home run race happening here at the stretch? We make a verbal Manny/Kiké/Manny sandwich. Josh Naylor keeps stealing bases with brains over speed. We are not impressed with Mark Teixeira’s run for congress. The flipped Little League bat brings in $10K at auction and it all goes to support the local league. Samuel Basallo answers the question about how many zeros it takes to be happy. 

September is Suicide Prevention Month. We encourage you to support local organizations, and/or if you are able, contribute to this American Foundation for Suicide Prevention fundraiser led by a friend of the show.

We say, “I remember the distaste more than the facts,” “Maybelle Blair is life goals,” and “a lot of cred in the vibe.” Fight the man, send your game balls to Meredith, get boosted, and find us on Bluesky @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. We now have episode transcripts available! They are available for free at our Patreon site. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

It Was Funnier on the Plane

Sure it’s the name of this episode’s beer of choice but it really does capture the moment. This week, from the nation’s occupied capitol, we bring you boyfriends getting out of slumps. Connor and Christian turn things around, PCA and Kyle remember the long ball. Zach is out for the season and we learn some new medical terms. Adley is out for at least a while and we learn some contract extension terms for Samuel Basallo and see a little smack down on extending other Os. We dig deep about NYY prospect Core Jackson and look for context around his quite horrible actions in college. Maybe more opportunities to teach about lessons of the past are better than fewer. We celebrate the Little League World Series and wish we all had the poise of Monica Arcuri. And we absolutely believe the Fascist in Chief when he assures us that the millions of people coming to the US for next year’s World Cup will have a “very easy time” getting in.

We say, “Mistaked? Mistaken? Mistooken?” “When you throw a squirrel into the game things get a little nutty,” and “I usually save those grains of salt for margarita rims.” Fight the man, send your game balls to Meredith, get boosted, and find us on Bluesky @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. We now have episode transcripts available! They are available for free at our Patreon site. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

The Bold and The Bitterful

Pottymouth’s inner 12 year old may giggle at episode 420 but her grown up teacher self lays out MLB’s drug policy and how it’s changed over time and between leagues, from “smoke your way to the 40 man” to “don’t show up high.” Player’s weekend brought us foods on bats, some philanthropy, and nostalgia for the good old days of nicknames on jerseys. We both have fantasy team pitching woes, but there’s also Junior making a name among the 21 year olds, and Zach turning that triple play. Marco’s little league bat flip gets pinned and monetized. The first women’s professional baseball tryouts are happening in your nation’s capital this weekend. If you can navigate through all the unnecessary National Guard currently invading DC, please try to join Patti at Nats Park on Monday to watch the final games to determine who is eligible for the draft. And say what you will about the Phanatic, but he did give us the vodka solution for beating the heat.

We say, “Star Warsy-looking people,” “ICE is picking up people trying to make a living mowing lawns,” and “Buy a bottle of wine for your favorite teacher.” Fight the man, send your game balls to Meredith, get boosted, and find us on Bluesky @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. We now have episode transcripts available! They are available for free at our Patreon site. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

Just Keep Your Swivel

We celebrate the “gravity” and the “magnitude” of the moment as Jen Pawol makes history as the first woman to umpire a regular season MLB game. We also put it into the disappointing context that not only is MLB 28 years behind the NBA, but, as Chelsea James notes, we almost had robo-umps before a woman had the gig. Our continuing excellent taste in baseball boyfriends is reinforced as the Heart and Hustle winners are announced, with an 80% NCiB BF showing. The PCA report turns into a vocabulary lesson with Outs Above Average and 5-Star catches. Shea turns batting lead-off into a show and we discover a Correa/Caratini/childhood link. The NYY Old-Timers are looking a little weekend-warrior-ish but we appreciate the effort. Our crosstraining/police blotter/rant is over the dangerous and demeaning throwing of sex toys onto the court at WNBA games. Pottymouth checks in with some old friends in the LMB. And please bookmark this link to the PWHL/Tim Horton Barbie because Patti needs one for Christmas and this fantastic little fundraiser is currently sold out.

We say “Hall-ish of Fame or Hall of Fame-ish?” “eye of the beardholder,” and “what’s weirder? Me saying dildo or me saying meme coin?” Fight the man, send your game balls to Meredith, get boosted, and find us on Bluesky @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. We now have episode transcripts available! They are available for free at our Patreon site. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

Gravity Always Wins

What a weekend for baseball. Patti witnesses small children in the stands absolutely take down a full grown booing adult for his poor sportsmanship, and then fireworks. Pottymouth gets a winning double header, dubious mascots, an imaginary friend, and then fireworks. Oh and also there was that trade deadline. The Os lose 100% of their Ramons and Cedrics, but their 21% of the Jacksons in the league turn a relay to throw out the runner at home. There’s a whole Taylor/Tyler trade and beer fridge situation, and some pitchers commute to their new team by walking from one bullpen to another. There was a Clemens on the mound, and a Kyle taking down Yankees with big swings. 

Teams can’t decide if they are marketing to Women, Ladies, or Girls but we think they all mean the same group of people. CLE cleans out some pitcher cubbies while the league conducts another possible career-ending gambling investigation. We decide the return of the Presidential Fitness Test is firmly in Police Blotter category. We have takes, and flashbacks. Bryce, Max, and others question the commissioner’s squirrely end run around union leadership and aren’t afraid to call it out. It seems Cuban girls playing softball are not a security threat but clearly their adult supervision cannot be trusted. The WBC brings the return of Dusty Baker, and a surprisingly stacked coaching staff for Venezuela. Patti recommends The Last Manager, mostly. And oh, hey, one CAN find the results of the Baseball for All Nationals in one handy place!

We say, “His name is Mort and he is a casket,” “booing with his whole diaphragm,” and “extravaganza lollapalooza situations.” Fight the man, send your game balls to Meredith, get boosted, and find us on Bluesky @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. We now have episode transcripts available! They are available for free at our Patreon site. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

Kids vs. Boo

In a surprising twist, this week’s police blotter is Little League-centric, from the policy to the personal. The entire Venezuelan Senior Little League team, made up of 13-16 year olds, was denied visas to participate in the Senior Little League World Series held in South Carolina this week. Yes, the United States broke the hearts of an entire team who not only proved themselves the best in Venezuela, then traveled to Bogotá in order to obtain visas, to then be told they are too much of a security threat to enter the US. And here at home, a player competing for the NJ Little League title was ejected from a game and then suspended for a bat flip. Which is not against the rules. “Horseplay” was added later to the “unsportsmanlike conduct” charge because even though it is in the eye of the beholder, horseplay appears in the safety rules.

In boyfriend news, Pottymouth’s catcher continues to be all Wong, even if her infielders are adorable (cue the drinking game). Cristopher Sanchez tosses a complete game to stay in Patti’s good graces. Cal menaces more records, and Cedric’s incredible game may be a swan song. Old guy Justin Turner jokes with old guy Rich Hill, while Tito and Kevin trade manager-level pranks. Nick Kurtz makes his young presence known, even if that triple is elusive. Women in Baseball Week is bracketed by the end of Baseball for All Nationals, and the lead up to the All-American Women's Baseball Classic.

We say, “Italian-sized pilsner – it’s shaped like a boot,” “That’s a little Amish joke,” and “I get to woo, you get to woo, we both get woo.” Fight the man, send your game balls to Meredith, get boosted, and find us on Bluesky @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. We now have episode transcripts available! They are available for free at our Patreon site. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

Horseplay

No kidding, the Swing Off as the ASG tiebreaker is in the collective bargaining agreement. CBAs also show up when we crosstrain with the WNBA – players are getting crap for backing off social justice activism in favor of “business.” And by business they mean negotiating their CBA. Here to tell you, fair pay is a social justice issue. We’ve got ASG takes – mic’d up players, unis, bling vs meaning in fashion coverage, and a crayon bat to make a statement. PCA started a new club, Kyle won’t back down, and Brayan came back up. Pottymouth mourns her Diamondbacks in the rough. Thank you, owners of the Guardians and the Commanders for your “no thank you” response to the fascist in chief’s directive to go back to their former, racist, team names. Travel bans and ICE activity cause the MLBPA to instruct international players to keep their immigration docs on them at all time, and have us revisiting FIFA logistics. Good luck to all the participants in the 10th Annual Baseball For All Nationals!

We say, “You educate so hard,” “Wrexham Massholes,” and “Guadalajara won’t do.” Fight the man, send your game balls to Meredith, get boosted, and find us on Bluesky @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. We now have episode transcripts available! They are available for free at our Patreon site. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

That’s a Labor Thing, Man

Again, we have publicly committed to predictions an hour before the (all NCiB Boyfriend) Home Run Derby begins, that you won’t hear until you already know who won. How’d we do? We also check in on our pre-season predictions on standings and individual awards and learn that while some are just as terrible as history has taught us to expect, we are surprisingly right on in some places. Those places are not the American League. We’ve got some pretty good running “for a catcher,” more benchmarks for PCA, Kyle treating OPACY like home, and some pretty irate Phillies. Congrats to Tito Francona for winning #2000! We wonder what’s in the HS drinking fountain water in Oklahoma that produced the #1 and #4 picks in this year’s draft. More commitments in the WBC, and some travel ban cross-training with FIFA.

We say, “It’s just not aerodynamic when your shirt is unbuttoned so far,” “His golf caddies have named him Pelé,” and “How do you solve a problem like Pottymouth?” Fight the man, send your game balls to Meredith, get boosted, and find us on Bluesky @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. We now have episode transcripts available! They are available for free at our Patreon site. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

It Was Funnier on the Plane

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