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BBC Radio 4


Natalie Haynes takes a fresh look at the ancient world, creating stand-up routines about figures from ancient Greece and Rome.


Natalie Haynes Stands Up for the Classics

No togas today please. Natalie celebrates the mid-winter festival of Ancient Rome, Saturnalia. According to Catullus, it's the 'best of days'. 

Expect cross-dressing, sweets, drinking games and the wearing of special pyjamas. Oh and anarchy and jokes. Sounds a bit like a Christmas pantomime? Not surprising, according to veteran pantomime dame André Vincent, who traces the origins of panto back to the fifth century. Early in that same century - late antiquity - a Roman Christian named Macrobius wrote the most comprehensive extant guide to Saturnalia, which was celebrated in some places, in one way or another, until possibly the eleventh century.

You are invited to be part of this festive show which includes gifts for the entire Radio Theatre audience (cue noisy rustling of sweet bags) and the wearing of traditional Saturnalian pointy hats (the 'pileus') to celebrate. Even Professor Llewelyn Morgan has one. Honest.

Producer...Mary Ward-Lowery

Saturnalia

Join Natalie Haynes and guests for half an hour of comedy and the Classics from the BBC Radio Theatre in London.
 
Natalie is a reformed comedian who is a little bit obsessive about Ancient Greece and Rome.
 
Today she stands up in the name of one of the most powerful women of Ancient Rome and Caligula's big sister, Agrippina the Younger. 
 
Julia Agrippina was pretty well-connected all round given that her granddad was the Emperor Augustus, her husband (also her uncle: don't ask) was Emperor Claudius and her son was Emperor Nero. 
 
And she was no slouch. Turns out it was her handiness with the purse strings that kept the Empire going. Also, who else has survived an assassination attempt by a specially built collapsible boat?
 
Producer: Mary Ward-Lowery

First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in May 2016.

Agrippina

Join Natalie Haynes and guests for half an hour of comedy and the Classics from the BBC Radio Theatre in London.
 
Natalie is a reformed comedian who is a little bit obsessive about Ancient Greece and Rome.
 
She stands up in the name of Greek playwright and inventor of 'old comedy', Aristophanes. Expect a chorus of frogs, rather too much information about padded costumes, and a sex strike. Oh, and a lot of gossip from two and half thousand years ago.
 
With special guests:

Rosie Wyles
Edith Hall 
Fiona Laird.

Producer: Mary Ward-Lowery

First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in April 2016.

Aristophanes

Join Natalie Haynes and guests for half an hour of comedy and the Classics from the BBC Radio Theatre in London.
 
Natalie is a reformed comedian who is a little bit obsessive about Ancient Greece and Rome.
 
She stands up in the name of Roman poet, Ovid. Expect frottage at the races, Greek myths from a female perspective, and enough inspiration for painters, writers and sculptures to last a couple of millenia. 

With special guests: 

Llewelyn Morgan
Michael Squire 
 
Producer: Mary Ward-Lowery

First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in April 2016.

Ovid

Join Natalie Haynes and guests for half an hour of comedy and the Classics from the BBC Radio Theatre in London.

Natalie is a reformed comedian who is a little bit obsessive about Ancient Greece and Rome.

She's standing up in the name of one of the world's greatest thinkers, Plato.

With the help of:

Psychotherapist, Philippa Perry
Classicist, Professor Edith Hall. 
 
Plato wasn't perfect, even though he talks about perfection all the time. Turns out he was on the chunky side and had bad eyesight. On the other hand, he was very good at wrestling.

Producer: Mary Ward-Lowery

First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in April 2016.

Plato

Join Natalie Haynes and guests for half an hour of comedy and the Classics from the BBC Radio Theatre in London. 

Natalie is a reformed comedian who is a little bit obsessive about Ancient Greece and Rome. 

Now she's standing up in the name of the Roman lawyer, politician and orator Cicero. 

Maybe we'd all love him a bit more if Shakespeare had had a nicer Latin teacher. Expect a lot of gossip from a thousand years ago. 

With special guests:

Lawyer Mark Stephens
Professor Llewelyn Morgan 

Producer: Mary Ward-Lowery

First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in August 2017.

Cicero

Join Natalie Haynes and guests for half an hour of comedy and the Classics from the BBC Radio Theatre in London.

Natalie is a reformed comedian who is a little bit obsessive about Ancient Greece and Rome.

This time Natalie stands up in the name of Greek writer Lucian. Expect to hear about the possible origins of 'The Life of Brian', the possible inspiration for Mickey Mouse and a trip to the moon about a thousand years before NASA.

With special guests Professor Edith Hall and Matthew Sweet.
Producer: Mary Ward-Lowery

First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in 2017.

Juvenal

Join Natalie Haynes and guests for half an hour of comedy and the Classics from the BBC Radio Theatre in London. 

Natalie is a reformed comedian who is a little bit obsessive about Ancient Greece and Rome. 

Now she standing up in the name of Greek writer Lucian. Expect to hear about the possible origins of 'The Life of Brian', the possible inspiration for Mickey Mouse and a trip to the moon about a thousand years before NASA. 

With special guests:

Professor Edith Hall
Writer and broadcaster Matthew Sweet. 

Producer: Mary Ward-Lowery

First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in August 2017.

Lucian

Natalie Haynes and guests return for half an hour of comedy and the Classics from the BBC Radio Theatre in London. 

Natalie is a reformed comedian who is a little bit obsessive about Ancient Greece and Rome. 

This time she's standing up in the name of Greek poet, Sappho, about whom we know so little, and most of what we think we know is made-up. But one thing is certain: her poetry is scorching, and unforgettable. 

There will also be a lot of gossip from over a thousand years ago. 

With special guests:

Novelist Stella Duffy
Classicist Professor Edith Hall 

With music from:

LiTTLe MACHiNe. 

Producer: Mary Ward-Lowery

First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in 2017.

Sappho

Join Natalie Haynes and guests for half an hour of comedy and the Classics from the BBC Radio Theatre in London. 

Natalie is a recovering comedian who is a little bit obsessive about Ancient Greece and Rome. Each week she takes a different figure from the Ancient World and tells their story through a mix of stand-up comedy and conversation.

Today she stands up in the name of Horace, the Roman poet who made friends of his enemies through the beauty of his writing, whom we all still quote today, often without realising. You know that bit of Latin in the Wilfred Owen poem? That's Horace. The son of a freedman, Horace was a master at avoiding political controversy. He was no looker, being by his own account short and fat, but he definitely had a racy side (think mirrors on the ceiling).

A town mouse, a country mouse, and a lot of gossip from a thousand years ago. 

With special guests novelist and poet Ben Okri and classicist Professor Llewelyn Morgan.
Producer...Mary Ward-Lowery.

Horace

Natalie Haynes tells stories of Penelope, the clever woman and perfect wife behind The Odyssey. 

Penelope fends off a hundred idiot would-be suitors with an exhausting programme of weaving and un-weaving; is the ideal single mother for most of her marriage and devises a cunning trick to make sure her husband is really who he says he is. Also she must have been a looker because Odysseus preferred her over her cousin Helen, who was objectively the most beautiful woman in the world.

Natalie finds new ways of thinking about ancient myths in this locked-down version of her stand-up show, with the help of Professors Edith Hall and Llewelyn Morgan.

Penelope

Lyt når som helst, hvor som helst

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