Help Me Be Me

Episodes

• Ep 288: Restoring Belonging + Agency: A Check-in ReflectionA lot of people are feeling a loss of agency, as though their efforts aren’t translating into the outcomes they hoped for. Many are also experiencing a loss of belonging; feeling like the path everyone told them to follow is no longer the right one. Maybe you had a grand plan, but things aren’t playing out the way you imagined. We all have a drive for happiness, love, and connection; it’s just that the old routes are evolving. In some ways, they’re becoming quite retro, reminiscent of our grandparents’ approach to life. Everything is being reinvented by technology, and in response we have to create routines that ground us and help us thrive amid the changes. This is an era of pivoting away from the race toward efficiency. In this episode, I’m channeling The Flaming Lips’ song “Do You Realize?” because the truly meaningful moments in life are the ones in which we deeply affect one another—when we show up for others, and when they show up for us. Those are the moments we have to curate and deliberately create context for. Sending love! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  374|50M
• 287: Freedom Recipe – Letting Go of the Measurements of OthersAs adults, subconsciously a lot of us are looking for someone to tell us what’s wrong with us. Like the subconscious is seeking out measurers–asking, “Are you someone who can tell me my worth in this particular way?” What part is doing this? The part that has a scar. And we are drawn to people who validate that implication – that subconscious fear/an unseen subconscious belief. This is for generating love, beauty and personal freedom. Adulthood– for me–has been the process of FREEING MYSELF from mental conditioning of all kinds. New things STILL dawn on me as I grow older. Which is so exciting – after you go through therapy and “solve yourself” to still recognize new insights as the years continue on. This is about freeing yourself from a limiting set of thoughts that is induced by someone else’s harsh or dysfunctional values and specific expectations. It’s also about coming home to a truer definition of love, beauty and ultimately a higher vibration for yourself. I send you all love – I wish you all beauty, love and success. Sponsors: Quince.com/helpme for free shipping and 365 day returns Wayfair.com to shop all things homeZenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over $65. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  373|54M
• 286: Losing Your Fear Goggles - Allowing Value to Guide OutcomesWhen we are feeling seated in our own value and worth, we can be guided by our highest hopes for ourselves. This is about navigating from a constant place of course-correction toward our “highest compass” which I am loosely defining as that awareness we have when we first wake up in the morning. This has tools for navigating relationships that are formed on codependent terms: growing out of trigger-based loops. It is also about overcoming the self who is energetically depleted and reacts from a place of lack. We can always choose higher if we can recall our higher goals and use tools to jump the train tracks toward that higher goal. Sending love! Sponsors: AquaTru.com - get 20% off your purifier using promo code HELPMEBEME Quince.com/helpme for free shipping and 365 day returns Wayfair.com to shop all things home Zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over $65. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  372|47M
• Ep 285: Can vs. Should: The little engine that needs reliefYes, you think you can, but should you? If you are a “doer” who tends to do lots for everyone else, there is likely a part of you that is stuck in that position. It’s one that feels bound by duty and the expectations of others, yet it’s conditioned and created by us. But it almost feels as if we don’t have a choice. If you’re feeling overworked and threadbare, the first step is to recognize that you are living at the cost of yourself versus designing life based on the truth of who you are. This is a small lens shift. I think a lot of people live from a state of urgency and must – I must do it all, I cannot say no. This condition is sometimes referred to as “too perfect parenting” or being “high functioning" or "type A." For a recovering codependent, there’s an almost invisible line between being productive and being dysfunctional. I think the key question to ask yourself is “is it still working?” Sometimes in life– it is working. Sometimes it is too much and we need to take a step back to reassess. If you are a person who muscles through life – this is a restorative episode that is aimed at creating balance and a more joyful experience of your life. A creative energy manifestation episode, if you are a person who has lost your path to creativity because of having zero room for play. Reference to the enneagram types: https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/ Sponsors: Betterhelp.com/helpmebeme - sign up and get 10% off your first month of therapy Quince.com/helpme for free shipping and 365 day returns Wayfair.com to shop all things home Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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• Ep 284: The Safe Container: Moving from Healed + HigherThe hardest thing to do is be guided by the highest self versus the weakest, triggered self. The weakest self wants a fix: wants to self-soothe in the face of a low feeling. When we can create a strong routine and a safe container, we can be guided by our highest, wisest self and we will witness our life be guided by what we actually want. What does it mean to have a safe container? It means you can create a consistent pattern in your life where you are able to feel grounded, you can honor yourself, and you can boundary your life around the treatment you choose for yourself. When we are able to create consistency for ourselves in our personal bar for treatment – by eliminating negative treatment from others that violate that bar, what happens is we create a new normal: we see growth, healthy change and an increased feeling of value. This creates a feeling of safety and happiness. The little you – the inner child – feels honored, seen, respected. This is when healing and self-work really “takes” and we see progress: our patterns of coping, self-soothing and compromise, fall away. We literally grow out of them. Sending love!! Sponsors: AquaTru.com - get 20% off your purifier using promo code HELPMEBEME Quince.com/helpme for free shipping and 365 day returns Wayfair.com to shop all things home Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  370|48M
• Ep 283: Attention is Your SuperpowerYour attention is your superpower means that whatever you give attention to will grow. That is the simple takeaway I want to give you with this episode. The most powerful force in your life is your attention: what you focus on, what you grow with your focus, and what you move past with deliberate soothing very much dictates what the dominant trajectory is in your life. You can alter every situation with what you intend: it’s what creates outcomes in your relationships, and in the way you choose to view the world. This is an episode inspired by a training I recently attended about enhancing intuition and being able to channel yourself toward your highest self. What it boils down to is not being driven by fear and shadow: remembering to lead from the good and trust that you can act from this place and let the doubt go. Sending much love! Support this week’s sponsors: Quince.com/helpme for free shipping and 365 day returns Wayfair.com to shop all things home Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  369|54M
• Ep 282: Cutting Invisible Ties – a practice of freeing oneselfThis episode is for creating emotional relief and soothing. I have tools for healing unhealthy loops, tools for giving yourself kindness and calm, and clearing your energy in the moment something old arises. I am pretty excited about this episode because it’s something I have been practicing myself frequently and I think it’s pretty magical. It’s about giving your brain external feedback to alter the hold of runhealthy energy. I think one thing that people often underestimate is visual feedback: how your space being clear and open translates directly to how calm you feel, for example. I have some visual practices that I will describe but if it helps you can also watch this on YouTube. Here is the podcast channel on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOWnmmRaDe-yI2A1IVUhUx0Zi1mKnH3gj Here’s the book I am reading and loving that inspired some of the tools: https://amzn.to/4xzCYmF Sponsors: Betterhelp.com/helpmebeme - sign up and get 10% off your first month of therapy AquaTru.com - get 20% off your purifier using promo code HELPMEBEME Quince.com/helpme for free shipping and 365 day returns Wayfair.com to shop all things home Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  368|44M
• Ep 281: Calming Self + Generating CoherenceWhen we practice a solid routine of taking care of ourselves, we build a resource we can return to and rely on. It grows from the practice of calming the self when we would otherwise be reactive to the drama of the outside world. When we override the base level responses, we grow our locus of control. A quiet reserve, a core that is much like a friend. That center can hold space: it has a memory that you can trust yourself, that you have been here before, and yes, everything will be okay. You can float through the waves. We become our own resource. This is an episode about recalling a sense of trust, faith, calmness in the face of a familiar, old panic. That panic might arise from a trigger of powerlessness: a perspective of lack that might come from any number of things – loss of title, not getting a job, a number on a scale. These familiar old triggers initiate a mental scarcity narrative that generates unhealth: your body receives a message that you are not safe, that there is ongoing threat. So this is an episode with tools for calming in the face of that. Calming, non-attachment allows us to reset reality anew and live in a different future. A positive and possible one. Support this week’s sponsors: Quince.com/helpme for free shipping and 365 day returns Wayfair.com to shop all things home Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  367|58M
• Ep 280: Going Along With it Anyway– Growing out of karmic loopsWhen an issue recurs in your life and you attract a specific kind of person or conflict, some would label that as karmic. A loop can also be a pattern we fall into that draws energy and creative force away from us – something that doesn’t align with our goals in life. The loops that I am talking about in this episode are mostly relationship-based there are also tools around individual behaviors. I called this “going along with it anyway” because it’s really about that moment of override: when our bodies tell us that something is wrong and we still get pulled into a conflict that makes us lose track of our values. What I find is when I get into these situations, there is something origin-based being triggered: a need to please or appease or prove our validity. When we heal from these wounds, we can completely skip them and do not get pulled into a compromising negotiation. That book I keep talking about is: The game of life and how to play it. https://amzn.to/3T3qaWY Sponsors: Betterhelp.com/helpmebeme - sign up and get 10% off your first month of therapy AquaTru.com - get 20% off your purifier using promo code HELPMEBEME Quince.com/helpme for free shipping and 365 day returns Wayfair.com to shop all things home Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  366|49M
• Ep 279: Wonderful Change – Intentional EnergyWe affect a lot in our life path with our energy and our intentionality. You quite literally get back what you put out – like attracts like. This is about having faith and putting the right magnets into this world. Leading with love. One thought from one of the books I am reading is, “The subconscious is energy without direction.” Meaning, it just flows at whatever you think about, it doesn’t factor in the qualifiers you may mentally be wrapping around that concept. So if you are thinking about a future situation, thinking “I don’t want this thing,” your subconscious energy is really just channeling the thing. With that in mind, how can you be really clear and intentional about what you focus on and what you tell yourself with your actions and the contexts you place yourself? This has exercises for welcoming only goodness, love and success. I have a couple books I am reading right now that I love and they very much inspired this episode. If you’d like to check them out: https://amzn.to/4gjPW2G https://amzn.to/4v9YuNm Support our sponsors: Quince.com/helpme for free shipping and 365 day returns Wayfair.com to shop all things home Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  365|45M