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Hey Happy Campers! Camp Counselors is a good natured podcast hosted by your favorite fake camp counselors Zachariah and Jonathan. Here at Camp Shady Birch we love the great outdoors in theory, but we’d rather spend our time making friendship bracelets, spreading camper gossip, keeping our heads in the clouds, and avoiding archery. We know we would make great camp counselors minus the fact that we know nothing about camping. So grab your sunscreen and bug spray because things are about to get campy.

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan Carson

We have strong opinions about pasta this week. Zachariah takes a controversial stand against homemade pasta, and Jonathan tries to take down big Manhattan clam chowder. Plus, the story of a treasure hunter who found millions in sunken gold and then sat in jail for a decade because he refused to say where the rest of it was. We also meet Luigi Primo, the Italian semi-pro wrestler whose finishing move is chucking pizza dough in his opponent's face. Zachariah buys a pole chainsaw and is LITRALLY obsessed. Plus so much more. Just listen, okay? You'll get it.

This episode was mixed and edited by Kevin Betts.

Sponsors:

➜ Go to Progressive.com to see if you could save on insurance.

➜ Get 20% off your first order, plus free shipping at MeUndies.com/counselors and using our code: counselors

Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!

Works Cited:

➜ "Italian Wrestler Shows Off Unique Pizza-Slinging Move in Viral Video, Pizza Hut Reacts." NDTV Food, edited by NDTV Food Desk, 13 Mar. 2026.

➜ "Treasure Hunter Freed from Jail after Refusing to Turn over Shipwreck Gold." BBC News, 14 Mar. 2026.

Camp Songs:

Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape

Social Media:

Camp Counselors TikTokCamp Counselors InstagramCamp Counselors FacebookCamp Counselors Twitter
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

174 - Homemade Pasta Is Actually Bad

In this mini episode we are reading listener submitted stories about a camper who was no match for basic home improvement projects, a camper who turned a minor issue into a full-BLOWN fiasco, and a harrowing tale of a camper who committed to a terrible cover-up with a splash of vodka.

Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!

Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror stories!

Camp Songs: Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape

Social Media:

Camp Counselors TikTokCamp Counselors InstagramCamp Counselors FacebookCamp Counselors Twitter
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Dumping Bong Water on His Couch - Trail Mix #124

Wellp... this episode starts in Hollywood and somehow ends in the emergency room. We talk about Zachariah’s debut Hollywood gig, staying at the Beverly Wilshire Hotel (yuh the hotel from Pretty Woman), and a night out in WEHO before Jonathan’s injury that sent the trip off the rails and into the hospital.

This episode was mixed and edited by Kevin Betts.

Sponsors:

➜ Go to Progressive.com to see if you could save on insurance.

➜ Skip the junk without overspending. Head over to ThriveMarket.com/camp to get 30% off your first order and a FREE $60 gift.

➜ Go to FactorMeals.com/camp50off and use code camp50off to get 50% off plus FREE breakfast for a year!

➜ Feel your best self, every day with IM8. Go to IM8health.com/CAMPCOUNSELORS and use code CAMPCOUNSELORS for a Free Welcome Kit, 5 free travel sachets, plus 10% off your order.

Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!

Works Cited:

➜ “Galway Hospital Accident Turns Mam’s Eyes ‘Alien’ Green.” Irish Star, 19 Feb. 2026.

➜ “Older Male Whales More Successful at Mating Because They’re Better Singers, Shows Study.” Good News Network, 28 Feb. 2026.

Camp Songs:

Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape

Social Media:

Camp Counselors TikTokCamp Counselors InstagramCamp Counselors FacebookCamp Counselors Twitter
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

173 - From Hollywood to Hospital Hell

In this mini episode we are reading listener submitted stories about a camper whose Payless rain boots turned her into a gaslighting queen, a getaway driver for a local dominatrix, and a horror story about a camper who witnessed something unspeakable in a party house bathroom.

Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!

Sponsors:

➜ Go to Progressive.com to see if you could save on insurance.

Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror stories!

Camp Songs: Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape

Social Media:

Camp Counselors TikTokCamp Counselors InstagramCamp Counselors FacebookCamp Counselors Twitter
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I Was A Dominatrix Getaway Driver - Trail Mix #123

We finally got enchiladas under the waterfall in Denver at the famous Casa Bonita! What a fever dream <3

This episode was mixed and edited by Kevin Betts.

Sponsors:

➜ Go to Progressive.com to see if you could save on insurance.

➜ Go to BollAndBranch.com/camp (and use code: camp) to get up to 15% off, plus free shipping on your first set of sheets. Exclusions apply. See site for details.

Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!

Works Cited:

➜ Reuters, “Turkey Soccer Player Gani Catan Uses CPR to Revive Seagull Struck by Ball During Playoff Match.” New York Post, 26 Feb. 2026.

➜ Marshall, Colleen. “Why Millions of Dollars Is Shredded by the Federal Government Each Day.” NBC4 WCMH-TV

Camp Songs:

Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape

Social Media:

Camp Counselors TikTokCamp Counselors InstagramCamp Counselors FacebookCamp Counselors Twitter
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

172 - We Went to Casa Bonita!

Get your tickets to see Zachariah Porter's new Live Comedy Tour!

Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!

Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror stories!

Camp Songs: Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape

Social Media:

Camp Counselors TikTokCamp Counselors InstagramCamp Counselors FacebookCamp Counselors Twitter
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How I Almost Ended Up On Dateline - Trail Mix #122

Sorry we missed you on Monday but we are HERE! In this episode we recap our trip to Level99 where we drank, swung from ropes, and Jonathan got locked in a magician's box. Its a super fun and obnoxious episode. love youuu! 

This episode was mixed and edited by Kevin Betts.

Sponsors:

➜ Tear. Pour. Live more. Go to LiquidIV.com and use code CAMP at checkout to get 20% off your first order.

➜ Go to Progressive.com to see if you could save on insurance.

➜ Talk it out, with BetterHelp. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at BetterHelp.com/CAMP

Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!

Works Cited:

➜ Lu, Donna. “Good Luck Dua Leaper: Scientists Return Frogs Wiped Out by Fungal Disease to Wild.” The Guardian, 3 Feb. 2026.

➜ Corbley, Andy. “Frog Wiped Out by Disease Returns to the Wild With the Help of ‘Frog Spas’ and ‘Frog Saunas’.” Good News Network, 10 Feb. 2026.

➜ “Chef Saves Customer’s Life (Shrimp Basket, Pensacola, Florida).” TODAY.com, Accessed 10 Feb. 2026.

Camp Songs:

Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape

Social Media:

Camp Counselors TikTokCamp Counselors InstagramCamp Counselors FacebookCamp Counselors Twitter
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

171 - Jonathan Got Locked Inside The Magician's Box

We’re back from the road with a fresh batch of tour tales! We were staying on the same floor as the Chicago Bulls and got the chance to train like an athlete when a fire alarm caused us to haul these big ole thighs up 13 flights of stairs! From there we get into the important stuff: the very questionable legality of NYC bodega cats, the man who broke into a Little Caesars to make and sell pizzas (kinda a hero... very Sammich coded). We address the special kind of torture that is "trying to buy concert tickets online," Canadian cafe haters on Yelp, and so much more!!

This episode was mixed and edited by Kevin Betts.

Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!

Works Cited:

➜ Agence France-Presse. “New York Seeks Rights for Beloved but Illegal ‘Bodega Cats’.” The Straits Times, 10 Feb. 2026.

➜ “Man Breaks into Little Caesars, Starts Making and Selling Pizzas, NC Police Say.” The Charlotte Observer, 3 Feb. 2026.

Camp Songs:

Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape

Social Media:

Camp Counselors TikTokCamp Counselors InstagramCamp Counselors FacebookCamp Counselors Twitter
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

170 - TSA Searched Zach's Silicone Yabbos

In this mini episode we share listener submitted stories about a camper looking to make a life change and become a work force diva, a blind dog who turned one summer night upside down, and a camper's wet and wild lake day went south.

Get your tickets to see Zachariah Porter's new Live Comedy Tour!

Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!

Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror stories!

Camp Songs: Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape

Social Media:

Camp Counselors TikTokCamp Counselors InstagramCamp Counselors FacebookCamp Counselors Twitter
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Patty's Plummet - Trail Mix #121

In this episode of Camp Counselors Podcast, we continue the tour saga with a trip to Charleston, an absolutely fabulous stop for our first time at Buc-ee's, a long haul to Raleigh, and then a cute little meltdown moment when our flight to Atlanta got canceled because of a freak snowstorm. AYY!

This episode was mixed and edited by Kevin Betts.

Get your tickets to see Zachariah Porter's new Live Comedy Tour!

Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!

Works Cited:

➜ Frederick, Nathan. “High School Students Repair Cars and Give Them to Single Moms: ‘You’re Really Making a Change in the World.’” Good News Network, 24 Jan. 2026.

➜ Tierney, Brendan. “Nashville Family Fights HOA over Generator Use during Ice Storm.” WSMV, 28 Jan. 2026.

Camp Songs:

Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape

Social Media:

Camp Counselors TikTokCamp Counselors InstagramCamp Counselors FacebookCamp Counselors Twitter
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

172 - We Went to Casa Bonita!

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