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Lyt når som helst, hvor som helst 

Dear Media


"Absolutely not" to legitimately everything.....Comedian Heather McMahan creates a safe-space for us to tell-all and bitch about the rest. No topics are off-limits as we break down the everyday struggles of doing the most, and the least, at the same damn time. Come for the humor, authentic discussion or call in the Hotline or should we say "Absolutely NOT-Line" with your life complaints. We will discuss it all. It's a joyful take on life's craziest moments. 


Absolutely Not

On this episode, Heather is in Atlanta and gearing up for a couple of wild upcoming weeks. She chats about the stresses of still living with Robin and solutions like joining a dojo or becoming a kickboxer. Decision fatigue has fully set in. She takes your voicemails about psychotic husband behavior, how to be a good neighbor, southern pronunciations, what the heck is happening with Sacramento show as well as the Unwell weekend.

Episode Sponsors:

Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

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Want to try a FREE pack of Goodwipes? Just buy a pack at Target, Walmart, Kroger—or your local store—then head to goodwipes.com/ABSOLUTELY, text them your receipt and get reimbursed!

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Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hope and a Prayer

On this episode, Heather is back in the Atlanta studio after getting back on the road with The Bamboozled Tour in Memphis and Charlotte. The Showgirl is back on the road and another showgirl is engaged! She chats about what went down in each city and goes down sorority rush memory lane. We get back to the voicemails where she takes on another type of wedding proposal, airline chicken etiquette and if too much baby oil is a thing.

Episode Sponsors:

Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information.

Visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT or use code ABSOLUTELYNOT at checkout to take an additional 10% off your next purchase.

Shop my favorite bras and underwear at SKIMS.com.

Don't be the friend who's always complaining about feeling like garbage—do something about it with LiverMD! Head to 1MD.org and use code [ABSOLUTELY] for 15% off your first order.

Go to cokeurl.com/simplyPOP to find out where you can try Simply Pop!

Ready to clean up your home and your health? Head to BranchBasics.com to shop their Premium Starter Kit and save 15% off with code ABSOLUTELY at BranchBasics.com.

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Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The Showgirl is Back!

On this episode, Heather is in LA and welcomes her fabulous friend, Retta to the pod! Retta and Heather met at a friend's birthday in Mexico and connected over margaritas and steak. They chat about auditions, how Glen Powell smells, and what’s a must have in her dressing room. 

Episode Sponsors:

Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information.

Go toSquarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

Elevate your fall wardrobe essentials with Quince. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.

Earn points on rent and around your neighborhood, wherever you call home, by going to joinbilt.com/absolutely.

Treat yourself to the most comfortable and innovative bras on earth and save 20% Off sitewide at honeylove.com/ABSOLUTELY.

OpenPhone is offering my listeners 20% off of your first 6 months at OpenPhone.com/absolutely.

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Well Done but Juicy with Retta

This week, we’re reminiscing tales from Heather’s last tour ahead of some stops in Tennessee and Texas. In this replay episode, she breaks down the details of the insane predicament she found herself in at the Memphis airport. She also ran into a couple Lasso kids in Texas and was slinging art in Mississippi for Robin like drug dealer from the 80's. That and more!

Episode Sponsors:

Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information.

For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT.

For a limited time, you can be first in line to experience the new Next Gen at special savings. Prolon is offering Absolutely Not listeners 15% off sitewide plus a $40 bonus gift when you subscribe to their 5-Day Nutrition Program at ProlonLife.com/ABSOLUTELY.

Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

Right now, ABSOLUTELY NOT listeners can save 30% on their first order! Just head to cornbreadhemp.com/ABSOLUTELY and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout.

Go to cokeurl.com/simplyPOP to find out where you can try Simply Pop!

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Return of Joy Ride to the ATM

On this episode, Heather is back in Atlanta after her annual European summer vacay. She has weeded through her tik-tok trolls only to realize she has come out ahead as America’s Unc. She relives her boat days, her Air France journey home, and her back to school shopping memories. She takes voicemails from girls on a best friend trip to Italy, gift giving and golf bag woes, and why she is going to Iowa. 

Episode Sponsors:

Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information.

You can shop Caraway Risk-Free! Enjoy fast, free shipping, easy returns, and a 30-day trial. Plus, if you visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase.

This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ABSOLUTELY and get on your way to being your best self.

To explore coverage, visit ASPCAPetInsurance.com/absolutely.

Elevate your fall wardrobe essentials with Quince. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Who’s Unc Now?

On this episode, Heather is recording straight from a pool house in Mallorca—armed with nothing but her phone, a questionable Wi-Fi signal, and enough acid reflux to ignite a small fire. She’s giving us a mid-vacation dispatch packed with thoughts on travel etiquette, her ongoing battle with GLP-1, and a passionate tribute to the unsung pop legacy of Brooke Hogan. Plus, a quick tour update and a reminder that boat days are the best days.

Episode Sponsors:

Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information.

For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT.

OpenPhone is offering my listeners 20% off of your first 6 months at OpenPhone.com/absolutely.

To explore coverage, visit ASPCAPetInsurance.com/absolutely.

Start paying rent through Bilt and take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/absolutely.

Philadelphia makes everything creamier. Visit creamcheese.com for recipe inspiration and so you can start adding Philadelphia to your recipes at home!

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Stronger than Ozempic

On this replay of the pod from almost exactly 3 years ago, we get Heather fresh off her extra long honeymoon. While she should feel refreshed, renewed and wildly in love- she is lucky to not be in an italian jail cell after clearly spending too much time with her new husband, Jeff. She breaks down the importance of communication, how much wine she drank every day at lunch and her plans to do it all over again (which she currently is doing in Portugal).

Episode Sponsors:

Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information.

Head to https://www.squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code ABSOLUTELY.

Go to cokeurl.com/simplyPOP to find out where you can try Simply Pop!

Right now, ABSOLUTELY NOT listeners can save 30% on their first order! Just head to CornbreadHemp.com/ABSOLUTELY and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout.

OpenPhone is offering my listeners 20% off of your first 6 months at OpenPhone.com/absolutely.

Give your summer closet an upgrade—with Quince. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and three hundred and 365-day returns.

To find out what all the hype is about for yourself, go to cakesbody.com. You can even use code ABSOLUTEY for 20% off your first order this summer.

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Two Weeks Too Long (Replay)

On this episode, Heather welcomes the one and only Robin McMahan to the studio. Robin is back from Portugal with a group of fabulous older women and bestows some advice before Heather's trip. They discuss the infamous EGG HAT, European Zara’s and the price of seabass. They obviously go into Robin’s dating dilemmas. They take your voicemails about boomers, summers at Chateau McMahan and the amount of virgin piña coladas Heather used to drink.

Episode Sponsors:

Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information.

Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

Head to https://www.squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code ABSOLUTELY.

If you visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase.

Prolon is offering Absolutely Not listeners 15% off sitewide plus a $40 bonus gift when you subscribe to their 5-Day Nutrition Program! Just visit ProlonLife.com/ABSOLUTELY

To find out what all the hype is about for yourself, go to cakesbody.com. You can even use code ABSOLUTEY for 20% off your first order this summer.

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Summer at Chateau McMahan with Robin

On this episode, Heather is in LA and welcoming her favorite bitch, Jackie Schimmel, who is about to head out on her own tour- Dim the Lights. They discuss how we all need to zoom out, berating each other's husbands, and social boundaries. Jackie takes Heather down on her unsolicited kindness to strangers while Heather then gets to the bottom of why Jackie didn’t join us on the cruise. 

Episode Sponsors:

Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully). Visit dukesmayo.com for more information.

Right now, you can get up to $200 off Square hardware at square.com/go/absolutely.

This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ABSOLUTELY and get on your way to being your best self.

 Get 15% off your first order of $100 or more at hillhousehome.com with code ABSOLUTELY15.

Start paying rent through Bilt and take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/absolutely.

Go to cokeurl.com/simplyPOP to find out where you can try Simply Pop!

To explore coverage, visit ASPCAPetInsurance.com/absolutely.

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Zoom Out with Jackie Schimmel

On this episode, Heather is on the up and up after the events of the last few weeks. She chats about how turtles and cardinals are now showing up as signs, what it was like 100 years ago, and how she plans to spend her time in Europe. While her life may be hectic right now, she turns to your voicemails to bring her back to reality. She hears about Louisiana gay uncles, how comfortable people have gotten in public and totally unhinged church facebook group requests.

Episode Sponsors:

Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information.

Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT.

OpenPhone is offering my listeners 20% off of your first 6 months at OpenPhone.com/absolutely.

Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

Right now, ABSOLUTELY NOT listeners can save 30% on their first order! Just head to CornbreadHemp.com/ABSOLUTELY and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout.

Produced by Dear Media

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Return of Joy Ride to the ATM

Lyt når som helst, hvor som helst

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